The Landover Baptist Church Forum

The Landover Baptist Church Forum (
-   Bible in a Year (
-   -   Day 293. Mark 4-6 (

Brother V 07-10-2014 04:39 PM

Day 293. Mark 4-6
Mark 4-6

Mark 4.

1 And he began again to teach by the sea side: and there was gathered unto him a great multitude, so that he entered into a ship, and sat in the sea; and the whole multitude was by the sea on the land.

In today's reading, Jesus spends a lot of time in, around, and on the water. Remember, Moses was the Ram (heck he even had horns); Jesus is the manifestation of Pisces. He spends a lot of time with water, he calls himself water, he makes people fishers of men, the ICHTHYS (or Jesus fish) is a fish. So he spends a lot of time doing neato things to water. Astrology is horseshit, but Jesus is real!

He then tells the parable of the sower. Seed lands on the side, on the stone, in the weeds, and in fertile ground.

The seeds on the side are eaten by birds, which is Satan.

The seeds on the stone, sprout, but die because there is no soil. These are people who are just modern easily offended christians.

Seeds in the weeds, are people who try to grow, but then care more about money, power, fame... than Jesus. They get choked out and don't grow.

We, the True Christians™, are the seeds growing in fertile soil. We grow roots, and we flourish, and we provide for the master, when he comes around and harvests us.

Remember, Jesus spoke in parables, because he didn't want the people back then to get into heaven. He told his disciples the meaning, but he didn't tell the others. I wonder at exactly what point he thought "I guess everyone can know these things". Well, Mark was written about 30 years after his death, so probably around then. So, then, during Jesus life, there were probably only 30-50 people who he allowed to understand his teachings. Everyone else on earth at the time, went to hell.

11 And he said unto them, Unto you it is given to know the mystery of the kingdom of God: but unto them that are without, all these things are done in parables:


34 But without a parable spake he not unto them: and when they were alone, he expounded all things to his disciples.

They get on a ship, there's a storm, Jesus sleeps through it, his pansy-ass disciples wake him up because they are afraid.

39 And he arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, Peace, be still. And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm.

Many believe that this story is included to show that Jesus has divine powers, that no other mortal really possessed. Weather control is a big thing. Other than Moses parting the sea, except that Moses didn't do it, God held back the waves, no one had really controlled the weather.

41 And they feared exceedingly, and said one to another, What manner of man is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?

If you want to be God, you gotta have God's powers.

Mark 5

1 And they came over unto the other side of the sea, into the country of the Gadarenes.

The modern location is Umm Qais. (use that word in scrabble!) There, there is high ridges and steep slopes, and there are hills above the port. Also, in 1973 a Roman tomb from around the time of Jesus was discovered, which means there were tombs... oh yeah...

2 And when he was come out of the ship, immediately there met him out of the tombs a man with an unclean spirit,

3 Who had his dwelling among the tombs; and no man could bind him, no, not with chains:

He was either possessed, or on PCP. As I don't think they had PCP, he was possessed.

5 And always, night and day, he was in the mountains, and in the tombs, crying, and cutting himself with stones.

In the tombs, crying, and cutting himself... what was he a H.I.M. fan? He was the first emo!

Then Jesus cast out the demons into pigs which jumped off the cliff and drowned themselves. The guy wanted to spend some time with Jesus, but he said go home and tell your friends.

20 And he departed, and began to publish in Decapolis how great things Jesus had done for him: and all men did marvel.

Decapolis isn't a city. It's 10 towns. Pliny the Elder (not the beer) named them.

Gerasa (Jerash) in Jordan
Scythopolis (Beth-Shean) in Israel, the only city west of the Jordan River
Hippos (Hippus or Sussita) in Israel
Gadara (Umm Qais) in Jordan
Pella (West of Irbid) in Jordan
Philadelphia, modern day Amman, the capital of Jordan
Capitolias (Beit Ras) in Jordan (Dion, Jordan)
Canatha (Qanawat) in Syria
Raphana in Jordan
Damascus, the capital of modern Syria; Damascus was considerably north of the others and so is sometimes thought to have been an "honorary" member.

(In other news, I never realized the Pliny the Elder was a contemporary of Jesus. Pliny was born in AD 23 and died at Pompeii on August 25, 79)

The guys then go to the other side, and a guy named Jairus had a sick daughter, so Jesus and the boys go to heal her.

On the way a lady who had womenly issues for 12 years (eew) touched Jesus.

27 When she had heard of Jesus, came in the press behind, and touched his garment.

28 For she said, If I may touch but his clothes, I shall be whole.

I'm a big fan of the narratives where we know what people other than the author are thinking, and then we can't even get exact words from Jesus the same throughout the Gospels.

29 And straightway the fountain of her blood was dried up; and she felt in her body that she was healed of that plague.

30 And Jesus, immediately knowing in himself that virtue had gone out of him, turned him about in the press, and said, Who touched my clothes?

Who touched me!!!?!!!

The disciples were like... uh ... dude... EVERYONE!!

Then someone comes from Jairus house and says the daughter died. Jesus is like "nah, she's just sleeping".

40 And they laughed him to scorn. But when he had put them all out, he taketh the father and the mother of the damsel, and them that were with him, and entereth in where the damsel was lying.

I don't remember ridicule being one of the stages of grief, but whatever.

41 And he took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha cumi; which is, being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise.

Hey, wake up.

43 And he charged them straitly that no man should know it; and commanded that something should be given her to eat.

So, no one listened to him, and that's why we have the story. Now, go get a sammich.

Mark 6

Jesus goes home, and teaches in the synagogue. The towns people are like, who the hell is he to teach us???

2 And when the sabbath day was come, he began to teach in the synagogue: and many hearing him were astonished, saying, From whence hath this man these things? and what wisdom is this which is given unto him, that even such mighty works are wrought by his hands?

3 Is not this the carpenter, the son of Mary, the brother of James, and Joses, and of Juda, and Simon? and are not his sisters here with us? And they were offended at him.

They had expected Jesus to be some massive guy, all the build up, and it's just Jimmy's brother!!! WTF?! If I wanted to see Mary's kid's work, I'd let him build me a bookshelf! (Hey, isn't he a bastard?)

4 But Jesus, said unto them, A prophet is not without honour, but in his own country, and among his own kin, and in his own house.

5 And he could there do no mighty work, save that he laid his hands upon a few sick folk, and healed them.

Do you have someone famous from your hometown? I know the mother of the former drummer from Static X. She's a really nice lady, kind of reminds me of the principal's assistant in Ferris Buehler. Just a pleasant, nice lady. I don't really know her son. I'd ask her how he was doing, and what they were up to. She'd be like "oh, they are on tour with Slayer... I don't like those boys, they have such potty mouths". And i'm like, have you listened to the words on the album??? But, when "kenny" was still in Static-X, i'd imagine when he was on tour, there'd be groupies and girls waiting for him. Then, he'd go home, and the people he went to high school with, who used to give him swirlies, would go up to him, and give him a wedgie... welcome home Ken, you nerd.

That's what it was like for Jesus when he went home. You may be famous out there, but here you are still the son of the carpenter. And all he ever wanted was to be popular at home.

How many college students go away and "find themselves" while at school? And you are like... uh, when did you become a hippy?

6 And he marvelled because of their unbelief. And he went round about the villages, teaching.

Then Jesus tells the 12 to go out and preach and cast out spirits, two by two.

8 And commanded them that they should take nothing for their journey, save a staff only; no scrip, no bread, no money in their purse:

9 But be shod with sandals; and not put on two coats.

(scrip is like a credit card).

There's a lot of discussion on the whole take a staff thing. Matthew 10:9-10 seems to say don't take one. Luke 9:3 seems to say the same. Whereas today, we see take a staff. You can make up your own mind on if it's a biblical contradiction or not.

12 And they went out, and preached that men should repent.

13 And they cast out many devils, and anointed with oil many that were sick, and healed them.

Good job boys.

14 And king Herod heard of him; (for his name was spread abroad : ) (note there's an emoticon in the bible right there, I separated it so there wouldn't be a smiley face) and he said, That John the Baptist was risen from the dead, and therefore mighty works do shew forth themselves in him.

Oddly, there is more evidence for the historicity of John the Baptist than there is for Jesus.

16 But when Herod heard thereof, he said, It is John, whom I beheaded: he is risen from the dead.

John was in prison of Herod, because he told Herod that he shouldn't be married to Herodias. Well, Herodias didn't like that and wanted John dead. Herod and Herodias had a daughter (here named Herodias as well) other places name her Salome. She did a dance for Herod. Herod liked it so much that he gave her a choice of rewards, she asked her mom what to get, and mom said John's head. So Herod had John's head cut off. Salome's dance wasn't just a dance recital piece. It's commonly thought of as a strip tease.

So, that's what happened to John.

Jesus and the boys go to the desert, then fed the 5000. Then Jesus sent the disciples out on a ship, while he stayed back and prayed.

So he walked out to them.

48 And he saw them toiling in rowing; for the wind was contrary unto them: and about the fourth watch of the night he cometh unto them, walking upon the sea, and would have passed by them.

Jesus strolls on the water. They were having a heck of a time rowing against the wind, and he was about to pass them.

49 But when they saw him walking upon the sea, they supposed it had been a spirit, and cried out:


50 For they all saw him, and were troubled. And immediately he talked with them, and saith unto them, Be of good cheer: it is I; be not afraid.

So, they get to the other side, and everyone is impressed with rock star Jesus.

56 And whithersoever he entered, into villages, or cities, or country, they laid the sick in the streets, and besought him that they might touch if it were but the border of his garment: and as many as touched him were made whole.

Except in his hometown, where to this day they still call him Jesus, Jose's brother. Dude just can't catch a break in Nazareth.

So what have we learned today.

1. In the rest of the world, Jesus is the saviour, in Nazareth, he's still the kid who messed up that one project in woodworking class.

2. Jesus is not a fish. Fish are in the water, Jesus was on it.

3. There seriously were a lot of evil spirits in people during this time.


All times are GMT. The time now is 05:45 AM.

Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2021, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Landover Baptist Forums 1620, 2018 all rights reserved