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Reload this Page A vast right-wing conspiracy - of GIFT IDEAS!
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Default A vast right-wing conspiracy - of GIFT IDEAS! - 11-09-2007, 03:48 AM

Since the vast majority of Landover Baptists refuse to use the internet due to fear of being exposed to pornography, satanic propaganda, and AIDS viruses, we can safely talk about what gifts we're getting for which of them, without them reading it.

This way we can avoid embarrasing incidents of two of us giving the same gift, and we can co-ordinate gifts of firearms with gifts of ammunition of the appropriate caliber.

First, I think it's safe to talk about Dr. Laurie because she swore she would never go online again following that unfortunate ****** incident, and she tends to stick by her word. Last year we all got her edibles, which nearly killed her. So, unless you're getting her celery, no food.

No food, except what I'm giving her: a gift certificate for her new favorite treat, which on a dollar-for-calorie ratio is actually very healthy:



"...the "Frrozen Haute Chocolate," a $25,000 chocolate sundae. The new dessert is made from a blend of 28 cocoas from all around the world and is infused with five grams of edible 23-karat gold and served in a goblet lined with edible gold. It is topped with whipped cream, more gold and a side of La Madeline au Truffle from Knipschildt Chocolatier, which sells for $2,600 a pound...It makes yesterday's $1,000 bagel look positively simple by comparison.

(And people say we're not generous - nonsense!)


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