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  • #16
    Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

    Le:13:3: And the priest shall look on the plague in the skin of the flesh: and when the hair in the plague is turned white, and the plague in sight be deeper than the skin of his flesh, it is a plague of leprosy: and the priest shall look on him, and pronounce him unclean.

    Read that and shudder, Brother Percy! I suspect that your intended has leprosy and is disguising the fact!
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    “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

    Author of such illuminating essays as,
    Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

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    • #17
      Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

      Now, the Bible speaks nothing about this issue. It neither endorses it, nor prohibits it. However, we should look at certain aspects to see whether this is good or not for her to do...

      1. As mentioned earlier in the thread, Muslims do it. Why would you want to emulate a terrorist?
      2. Many men prefer a totally bald mons veneris because they have pedophiliac fantasies of young pre-pubescent girls. Surely you don't want to be lumped into that category.
      3. By shaving, she is spending time with her fingers down near her woman-flower unnecessarily. The only time a woman's fingers should be anywhere near there are when she either goes to the bathroom, showers, or readies herself to receive her husband's turgid member.

      If you would like, I could talk to your wife one-on-one. Sometimes women are more at ease with a pastor than their own husbands and might relax and open herself up to me.

      Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.

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      • #18
        Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

        If God made it this way then why change it? Shaving it means God did it wrong when He designed it.

        I dunno about you but if and when I get married and I find anything less than a rainforest down there I'd be questioning her moral values.
        Upon the wicked he shall rain snares, fire and brimstone, and an horrible tempest: this shall be the portion of their cup. (Psalm 11:6)

        GOD HATES FAGS
        Romans 1:18-32, 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, 1 Timothy 1:8-11, Jude 7, etc
        DEATH PENALTY FOR FAGS

        WHITE AND PROUD

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        • #19
          Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

          Originally posted by Brother_Percy View Post
          WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?
          Yes, and get that butch dyke to shave her moustache too. Jesus hates women with moustaches!

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          • #20
            Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

            Originally posted by MarkBroccardo View Post
            Yes, and get that butch dyke to shave her moustache too. Jesus hates women with moustaches!

            Easy Bucko that could get you in trouble around here.
            Wrestling with Demons.
            Apostle at LARGE to the Heathen Latin Chicas.
            LBCs Token compliance to NAFTA

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            • #21
              Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

              1 Corinthians 6:11 tells us

              For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered.

              If she is to be uncovered, she should be shaven. I assume we have relations with our wives while she is uncovered. We aren't magical underpants wearing mormons or joos doing it through a hole in a sheet, after all.
              Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.


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              • #22
                Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

                Originally posted by Brother_Percy View Post
                Friends,

                As you all know my Wedding Day is fast approaching (I hope you all got the invites), and I have a rather delicate question to ask. Why do women shave their vaginas? Is this normal? Is it ok for a Christian woman to trim her lady garden?

                I am only asking, because while I was discussing the Wedding arrangements with my Fiancee' the other night, she asked me if I wanted her to have her cooter trimmed for our wedding night. Needless to say I kinda choked, and spat my venti non-fat Vanilla Frappucinno all over her - I was THAT shocked!

                What should I do? And does it make a difference? I mean, it's not like I would ever want to look at it. Would God approve of such a thing?
                First of all, forgive me Jesus for posting in the men's forum. But it seems like we might have drifted off subject and failed to answer Brother Percy's questions...

                I will assume that Brother Percy's bride is the only person who has seen her vagina, so she may not be able to answer . . . Do you have an enormous hairy beaver? But perhaps she knows that she has an enormous, hairy, beaver and perhaps, she fears that her enormous hairy beaver might become an obstacle to the newlywed couple's first experience. Worse yet, bride of Percy might cause our Brother's seed to be spilt as her enormous hairy beaver gets in the way of nature.

                So it is not unreasonable for the bride to shave herself, and I agree with the verse... For if a woman is not covered, let her also be shorn. (1Co 11:6) But I do think it is important to warn the bride that once she has opened that door (shaving the Devil's Valley), she has created a constant maintenance problem as ..."All that do wickedly shall be stubble." (Mal 4:1) So the decision should be weighed cautiously. Perhaps on of our certified heterosexual pastors should take a quick peek and help the bride with her decision-making?

                HELPFUL, MOTHER GLENDORA
                Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.

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                • #23
                  Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

                  Originally posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
                  First of all, forgive me Jesus for posting in the men's forum. But it seems like we might have drifted off subject and failed to answer Brother Percy's questions...

                  I will assume that Brother Percy's bride is the only person who has seen her vagina, so she may not be able to answer . . . Do you have an enormous hairy beaver? But perhaps she knows that she has an enormous, hairy, beaver and perhaps, she fears that her enormous hairy beaver might become an obstacle to the newlywed couple's first experience. Worse yet, bride of Percy might cause our Brother's seed to be spilt as her enormous hairy beaver gets in the way of nature.

                  So it is not unreasonable for the bride to shave herself, and I agree with the verse... For if a woman is not covered, let her also be shorn. (1Co 11:6) But I do think it is important to warn the bride that once she has opened that door (shaving the Devil's Valley), she has created a constant maintenance problem as ..."All that do wickedly shall be stubble." (Mal 4:1) So the decision should be weighed cautiously. Perhaps one of our certified heterosexual pastors should take a quick peek and help the bride with her decision-making?

                  HELPFUL, MOTHER GLENDORA
                  Are you suggesting that any of our pastors could be anything other than heterosexual?
                  Old Man Hatchet wears Old Spice and that borders on being a metrosexual, but, woman! You are out of place here.
                  Matthew:
                  5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                  5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                  10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                  10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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                  • #24
                    Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

                    Hey man, I have more than a little experience with vaginas so I hope I can help. There are basically two reasons you want your lady to shave her cat.

                    The first reason derives from the old proverb "don't stick your hand anywhere you can't see." Let's say you're a cop and you're investigating a drug house, I think we can both agree that it would be unwise to reach anywhere that you can't see, for fear of pricking your finger on a needle or something like that. The same can be applied for reaching down snake or gopher holes. Apply this to a woman's vagina. If you can't see down there why are you sticking your Johnson in it? Who knows what kind of shit might be hiding in there.

                    The second reason is pretty simple: you don't want to do a chick that has a massive bush, but the only problem is that the only way to find out if a girl has a massive bush is by taking her pants come off, and once a person's pants are off you have to have sex with them. Once those pants come off you've reached the point of no return, bro. It's better to be safe than to be sorry, you know? You don't want to be sitting there naked when she pulls down her pants and you get to see how she has some ZZ Top shit going on down there, because at that point it's too late to get out of there and you gotta just go with it.

                    Therefore, it is my suggestion that you also ask and insist on the girl shaving beforehand. And by "shave" I don't mean "trip" or "leave a landing strip" or something like that, I mean her crotch needs to look like a WWI no man's land with barbed wire and dead trees all over the place-- looks like a bomb full of mustard gas went off and will kill anything that steps foot in it.
                    My story is like that of most, if not all Born Again Christians: I was lost, I did some drugs, I had sex with a lot of women, then I had sex with a lot of men, then I did it with some children, then I did it with some animals, then I went back to women for a little bit but also did it with animals on the side, then I did it with men and some children, then I got a bunch of irreversible STDs and can no longer get an erection so I decided to give my life to Christ since I can't bone women or men or children or animals anymore. Read my testimony here: http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=21140

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                    • #25
                      Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

                      Im not sure about somethin. When my buddy Hank downstairs over here to the Motel 6 in Davenport made me go in that bar Saturday night after we got throwed out a the mass and he made me let that girl in her underpants sit on my lap even though she wouldnt sit still for nothin I didnt see where she mighta had hair except on her head. So you mean gals get hair down there like guys do? What? Seriusly? That sounds creepy if its for real. Why would a gal wanna look like a guy down there? My aunt up to Dubuque she had a mustash and some hairs on her chin too and she looked a little guy like but I dont know if she woulda done that muich to go lookin like a guy. Why on earth would a gal wanna look like a guy down there? Who see it anyway? I just dont get it. Well when I gets marryed Im gonna lay down the law and no gal a mine is gonna grow hair like a man anywheres on her self. Thats for sure. I always thought the only place for hair on a gal is her head and maybe a little on her arms long as it aint too think or dark like a monkey. I think if you let a gal grow hair where ever she wants next thing you know she gonna wanna braid it or tie it in nots or put beads in it or turn it a differnt color. Praise Jesus they dont grow hair under there arms too.
                      GOT DEMONS? WE CAN HELP! THEY'RE EVERYWHERE AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO FIGHT THEM ALONE! JESUS WANTS YOU TO BE RID OF THEM ONCE AND FOR ALL! YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO IT ALONE! LET US HELP YOU RIGHT AWAY!

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                      • #26
                        Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

                        Hey amigo, there is nothing rong with a little hair si? When you lick the chesse out of her pink taco you use the hair as floss, si. In mexico if she has hair it mean that she is old enough for sex.

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                        • #27
                          Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

                          Originally posted by Pedro Chavez View Post
                          Hey amigo, there is nothing rong with a little hair si? When you lick the chesse out of her pink taco you use the hair as floss, si. In mexico if she has hair it mean that she is old enough for sex.
                          Well I dont eat messican food and Lola she dont cook it either. She makes pot roast and pie. And I use dentle floss not hair you dum beener. And most babies are born with hair but you do what ever you want with your children in messico. They all look like monkeys when they grow up anyhoo. No wonder messicans wanna come to Gods favorit country the USA and specialy Gods favorite state Iowa. Jesus lives here you know. Best watch youR step and have a good green card here AMIGO!
                          GOT DEMONS? WE CAN HELP! THEY'RE EVERYWHERE AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO FIGHT THEM ALONE! JESUS WANTS YOU TO BE RID OF THEM ONCE AND FOR ALL! YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO IT ALONE! LET US HELP YOU RIGHT AWAY!

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                          • #28
                            Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

                            Let your fiancée do what she pleases it is her body and you have no control over it and you people are homophobes. Gay people are just the same as you there are no differences and God loves them just the same.xxxx

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                            • #29
                              Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

                              Dear, this forum is for the menfolk to have a place to discuss important matters without fear of stray women nagging them. Besides, this discussion is many years old now. In the meantime, you are most welcome to introduce yourself HERE so we can greet you properly! You can read all kinds of helpful information on this thread for newcomers like yourself. If you’d like to share your opinion, kindly provide the Scriptural Support where we can see how wonderfully God said it first. Finally, your rights on our forum can be found HERE.

                              Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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                              • #30
                                Re: WEDDING QUESTION : SHOULD MY FIANCEE' SHAVE HER VAGINA?

                                Originally posted by Go girls View Post
                                Let your fiancée do what she pleases it is her body and you have no control over it and you people are homophobes. Gay people are just the same as you there are no differences and God loves them just the same.xxxx
                                Actually, the Lord God has provided written instructions vis a vie homosexuals and how we ought act toward them.. The Word is that they are to suffer smiting.

                                Also, your comments regarding the female body and ownership thereof are scandalous.

                                And pay attention to the advice Sister Mary Etheldreda has provided.
                                God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11

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