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It seems to me that a few new hymns would be a good idea so the Bathfire Prize for Excellence in Tuneful Praise has been announced. The winner will receive $50,000 and have his (or her – though this is unlikely) hymn published and then sung by the Choir of Landover Baptist Church on a suitable occasion (e.g. the defeat of Obama, the reintroduction of segregation, the outlawing of all homosexuality, completely unrestricted gun sales, etc.)
Hymns should be in traditional form, I attach an example written by my nephew Zebulun, which probably needs a few amendments but will give you the idea:
Jesus, Immanuel,
Who is our rock,
Came to this world
And He showed us His
Glory so wondrous
No man can surpass,
With entry to heaven.
By the hole in his
Tomb in the garden,
With a stone at the front,
Mary, His mother, stood
Rubbing her
Forehead with grief
and with sorrow. In fits,
She sobbed for her Son
And she fondled her
Beads that she held
In her hand, for a bit
She adjusted her dress
And she started to
See His wonders were holy;
They were not a trick,
And young ladies fainted
At the size of His
Following and Wisdom,
Whilst he pulled his stunts,
Rubbing fine oil
Into numerous
Sores that afflicted
The old and the poor,
Whilst Mary, His friend,
Walked the streets as a
Saint, in Judea
With faith and with pluck
She taught all the Jews a
New way to
Worship their maker.
While Paul gave a gloss
on the meaning of Jesus
and the best way to interpret His Words.
I wish you all the best of luck and hope the Spirit enters your soul.
Hymns should be in traditional form, I attach an example written by my nephew Zebulun, which probably needs a few amendments but will give you the idea:
Jesus, Immanuel,
Who is our rock,
Came to this world
And He showed us His
Glory so wondrous
No man can surpass,
With entry to heaven.
By the hole in his
Tomb in the garden,
With a stone at the front,
Mary, His mother, stood
Rubbing her
Forehead with grief
and with sorrow. In fits,
She sobbed for her Son
And she fondled her
Beads that she held
In her hand, for a bit
She adjusted her dress
And she started to
See His wonders were holy;
They were not a trick,
And young ladies fainted
At the size of His
Following and Wisdom,
Whilst he pulled his stunts,
Rubbing fine oil
Into numerous
Sores that afflicted
The old and the poor,
Whilst Mary, His friend,
Walked the streets as a
Saint, in Judea
With faith and with pluck
She taught all the Jews a
New way to
Worship their maker.
While Paul gave a gloss
on the meaning of Jesus
and the best way to interpret His Words.
I wish you all the best of luck and hope the Spirit enters your soul.
I LOVE YOU JESUS! 
Jesus!
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