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  • #1

    Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

    I'm tired of Homers and witches and Walt Disney trying to make unicorns some kind of cute warm fuzzy animal. This is what God says:




    Isaiah 34:7
    And the unicorns shall come down with them, and the bullocks with the bulls; and their land shall be soaked with blood, and their dust made fat with fatness.

    Does that sound cute? No! A Unicorn is a mean beast!
    Matthew:
    5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
    5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
    10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
    10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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    Tags: god's wonderful creations, goths will burn in hell, unicorns, vampires zombies and witches
  • #2
    Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

    PRAISE JESUS!! I share your outrage Brother Eliot! Look in any frilly gift shop and you'll see pink plastic unicorns, waiting to convert little boys into the nightmare world of sodomy.

    The REAL unicorns were a manly, masculine beast, as the Holy Word of God tells us.

    Numbers 23:22 God brought them out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn.
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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    • #3
      Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

      Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
      PRAISE JESUS!! I share your outrage Brother Eliot! Look in any frilly gift shop and you'll see pink plastic unicorns, waiting to convert little boys into the nightmare world of sodomy.
      It gets worse. Atheists, in their more candid moments, admit that they worship a demon called the Invisible Pink Unicorn. That proves that this is all part of a seamless web of evil, cast by the devil himself.
      This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

      Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance

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      • #4
        Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

        Whats next? Teddy Bears being cursed by the devil?
        A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.

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        • #5
          Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

          Originally posted by Ixi View Post
          Whats next? Teddy Bears being cursed by the devil?
          Actually, Ixi, if you ever put away your candles, crystals, and Silver Ravenwolf books long enough to read Scripture, you'd know that bears are not cute little stuffed toys, but instruments of Divine wrath:

          II Kings 2:23-24: And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head. And he turned back, and looked on them, and cursed them in the name of the LORD. And there came forth two she bears out of the wood, and tare forty and two children of them.

          Now, do you have any other ridiculously easily answered questions for us?
          This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

          Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance

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          • #6
            Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

            Unicorns are awesome! They don't even exist!
            A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.

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            • #7
              Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

              Originally posted by Ixi View Post
              Unicorns are awesome! They don't even exist!
              They're awesome, and they don't even exist? You're even further gone than I thought.
              This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

              Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance

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              • #8
                Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

                In stories thier awesome.
                A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.

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                • #9
                  Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

                  Originally posted by Ixi (with grammar correction by MSTT) View Post
                  In stories they're awesome.
                  Oh, I get it. You care what those "stories" say, but you don't care what the Holy Bible says. Let's see how "awesome" you find hell to be.
                  This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

                  Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance

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                  • #10
                    Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

                    Originally posted by Ixi View Post
                    In stories thier awesome.
                    Awesome as in going around looking for virgins to violate with that horn of theirs? Or what do you think the phrase "conduct themselves familiarly" means?

                    Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

                    Hot Must ReadThreads!


                    Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

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                    • #11
                      Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

                      Originally posted by Ixi View Post
                      In stories thier awesome.
                      Ixcki, I know what you are referring to. HAIRY POTTER! A series of books written by an English witch. THROW THOSE BOOKS AWAY! THEY WILL LEAD YOU STRAIGHT TO HELL!
                      Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
                      "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
                      Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


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                      • #12
                        Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

                        Actually, there is speculation that there might indeed have been unicorns, though now extinct, although there is no evidence for it.

                        If they existed, it's possible they were a mutation of some sort.
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                        Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

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                        • #13
                          Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

                          Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
                          Actually, there is speculation that there might indeed have been unicorns, though now extinct, although there is no evidence for it.

                          If they existed, it's possible they were a mutation of some sort.
                          So you are willing to speculate that unicorns, which are first mentioned in the Bible may have existed but the INSPIRATION for the Bible itself doesn't?

                          I have heard speculation that a woman with a functional brain might indeed have existed, though now extinct, although there is no evidence for it.
                          Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
                          "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
                          Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


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                          • #14
                            Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

                            I said it is speculated that unicorns existed. The bible is so full of illogical things, contradictions, and soforth. There is much to support the fact that the bible is a bunch of balderdash.

                            I'm not saying I believe in unicorns 100%, merely stating that it is not impossible that they MIGHT have existed.
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                            Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

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                            • #15
                              Re: Unicorns are not "cute" They are a terrible tool from God.

                              Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
                              I said it is speculated that unicorns existed. The bible is so full of illogical things, contradictions, and soforth. There is much to support the fact that the bible is a bunch of balderdash.

                              I'm not saying I believe in unicorns 100%, merely stating that it is not impossible that they MIGHT have existed.
                              So.....unicorns, first described in the BIBLE may have existed. Do you agree thus far?
                              Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
                              "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
                              Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


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