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  • Kerplunki Zerplopski
    Unsaved Trash Suspected Polack
    • Apr 2008
    • 111
    #31
    Re: Angelic ancestors

    THOU
    *Smash*
    SHALT
    *Wack*
    NOT
    *Stab*
    MESS
    *Strangle*
    WITH
    *Cleave*
    CHOCOLATE!

    *SMACKS EVERYONE WHO DARES TO INSULT CHOCOLATE OVER THE HEAD (REPEATEDLY) WITH A HUGE CHOCOLATE BAR... then eats the bar... staring gleefully at the bloodied corpse*
    I CALL REVOLUTION!!
    I DEMAND RIGHTS FOR UNSAVED SCUM!

    VIVA LA REVOLUTION!

      Comment

      • Ezekiel Bathfire
        Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
        Christ's Rottweiler
         
        • Jan 2008
        • 22897
        #32
        Re: Angelic ancestors

        Originally posted by Kerplunki Zerplopski View Post
        THOU
        *Smash*
        SHALT
        *Wack*
        NOT
        *Stab*
        MESS
        *Strangle*
        WITH
        *Cleave*
        CHOCOLATE!

        *SMACKS EVERYONE WHO DARES TO INSULT CHOCOLATE OVER THE HEAD (REPEATEDLY) WITH A HUGE CHOCOLATE BAR... then eats the bar... staring gleefully at the bloodied corpse*
        Proof, if needed, of the evils of chocolate...
        sigpic


        “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

        Author of such illuminating essays as,
        Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

          Comment

          • Kerplunki Zerplopski
            Unsaved Trash Suspected Polack
            • Apr 2008
            • 111
            #33
            Re: Angelic ancestors

            no... that was proof of the deranged state of my mind... not of the Evils of Chocolate...
            I CALL REVOLUTION!!
            I DEMAND RIGHTS FOR UNSAVED SCUM!

            VIVA LA REVOLUTION!

              Comment

              • Brother Temperance
                Senior Usher
                True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
                A very nice young man
                True Christian™
                • Sep 2006
                • 15621
                #34
                Re: Angelic ancestors

                Originally posted by Kerplunki Zerplopski View Post
                THOU*Smash*SHALT*Wack*NOT*Stab*MESS*Strangle*
                WITH*Cleave*CHOCOLATE!

                *SMACKS EVERYONE WHO DARES TO INSULT CHOCOLATE OVER THE HEAD (REPEATEDLY) WITH A HUGE CHOCOLATE BAR... then eats the bar... staring gleefully at the bloodied corpse*
                This just shows how dangerous chocolate is. It's fine if consumed in moderation - say, once a fortnight or so - by a healthy heterosexual Christian gentleman like myself, but if consumed in excess by a feeble-minded Polack like the poster above, the effects can be most worrying.
                O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                  Comment

                  • just Jimi
                    Unsaved trash
                     
                    • Apr 2008
                    • 69
                    #35
                    Re: Angelic ancestors

                    Originally posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
                    As I see it, chocolate came from the Incas and other similar heathens: (i) it is thus heathen, (ii) Cortez slaughtered them all because they were heathens and stole chocolate for the pope (iii) therefore not only is chocolate heathen, it is tainted by the Antichrist, the vicar of Rome, otherwise known as the pope!

                    Spit it out! Your very soul is at risk!
                    But if Cortez stole the chocolate for the pope......then I think that the pope liked the little brown and yummie piece of food and that he wanted it all for itselfs....

                    tsk,tsk, tsk... that poor pope...
                    Thou shall fear the truth and will not change someone's signature!!

                      Comment

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