Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

[Mary Etheldreda]

We all know that when Jesus was resurrected, many dead people came out of their graves and tombs no longer dead, and joined the big party in downtown Jerusalem.

And, behold, the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom; and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent;
And the graves were opened; and many bodies of the saints which slept arose,
And came out of the graves after his resurrection, and went into the holy city, and appeared unto many.
Matthew 27:51-53

I'll be praying for my best friend Cynthia who died from melanoma last year, despite praying to Jesus to be supernaturally protected from the UV rays from the sun He created for us. I don't know if her body will be decomposed or if, like Jesus and Lazarus, it will be perfectly healthy and she'll smell clean. I wonder if her ear will be back. They had to remove it, ultimately. Anyway, I don't want to presume but it would be nice if she didn't look like an extra on Walking Dead. Anyway, who are you praying for Jesus to resurrect this Easter?

(PS, I don't think she'll look like this, but I couldn't find a better picture. Also, I like the question.
Yes, I take all the Holy Bible literally. Jesus meant what He said and said what He meant.


Glory!)

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

I am asking, if Jesus feels that it is appropriate, to raise President Ronald Reagan and a selection of velociraptors from the dead to help President Trump in His battle against the swarming sodomites and federal judges.



Ezekiel 20:33
As I live, saith the Lord GOD, surely with a mighty hand, and with a stretched out arm, and with fury poured out, will I rule over you:


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Des]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

Sweet little Rufus the weasel. I so miss the way he would launch himself into the faces of strangers, showering them with toothy kisses as a way of introductions. He left a mark on everyone he ever met. Sometimes seven or eight marks.

[Alvin Moss]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

I'm praying for Jesus to return.

I've always felt like there is a good chance that when Jesus does make His triumphant return, it will be on Easter Day. It would be fitting to come back on the anniversary of the same day He rose, but it would also take advantage of the general world wide awareness that it is the anniversary of the glorious resurrection of Jesus Christ. That's the kind of free advertising that helped President Trump overcome the forces of Satan in America.

That's why I always keep a window slightly open around Easter. I definitely don't want to miss the shout and the trumpets. It will be grand to look up in the sky and see Jesus descending, while the local heathens run for their lives, knowing their hour is come round at last.

[Basilissa]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

Sweet little Rufus the weasel. I so miss the way he would launch himself into the faces of strangers, showering them with toothy kisses as a way of introductions. He left a mark on everyone he ever met. Sometimes seven or eight marks.

Oh yes, sweet Rufus. It's been a year since he chewed through the wiring of Large Hadron Collider, hasn't it? Have you been able to recover his charred remains?

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

It might seem strange for a True Christian™, but I want to see Cristopher Hitchens alive for just a brief time. I want to tell him again what a jerk he is. And, I'd like to hear how he likes burning in hell.

If I could make him just a little more miserable it would make Easter all the more joyful.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

Is there a time limit? I'd like to see Samuel and could ask him about David's hair.

I Samuel 16 . KJV
12a And he sent, and brought him in.
12b Now he was ruddy, and withal of a beautiful countenance, and goodly to look to.
12c And the LORD said, Arise, anoint him: for this is he.
13a Then Samuel took the horn of oil, and anointed him in the midst of his brethren:
13b and the Spirit of the LORD came upon David from that day forward.

I think this would be a strong witness for the doubters, especially at such a special time of year.

[Thomas Taylor]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

I think I would like to sit and chew the fat with Jeffrey Dahmer as I would like to know about his walk with Jesus just before he was executed.


YIC
TT

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

I think I would like to sit and chew the fat with Jeffrey Dahmer as I would like to know about his walk with Jesus just before he was executed. []

YIC
TT

Dear Friend,

Brother Jeffrey was never executed but, in fact, brutally murdered by a fellow criminal while in prison, as explained by our Godly Pastor Osborne. It is very important that Christians keep to the tested facts that can be studied in both the Bible and secular research in order not to appear ridiculous in the eyes of vile unbelievers.

While in prison, Brother Jeff realized what a horrible life he led. He felt the tugging of Jesus on his heart. So Brother Jeff began to talk with Pastor Roy Ratcliffe about repenting his sins and accepting Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior. In 1994, Brother Jeffrey was baptized and become a fellow brother in Christ. Praise Jesus!

Sadly, Brother Jeff was murdered in prison by being beat to death by an unsaved negro monster with a barbell.

Of course, this does not change the ultimate outcome (John 3:15, and the sad and horrible story of Mr. Dahmer remains one of the ultimate examples of the goodwill of Jesus (see also Jonah 4:2 and, what the heck, the whole Chapter!) towards those who discard sin and accept Him sincerely. The party when Mr. Dahmer entered Heaven must have been grandiose!

Luke 15:7
I say unto you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which need no repentance.




Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Thomas Taylor]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

Dear Friend,

Brother Jeffrey was never executed but, in fact, brutally murdered by a fellow criminal while in prison, as explained by our Godly Pastor Osborne. It is very important that Christians keep to the tested facts that can be studied in both the Bible and secular research in order not to appear ridiculous in the eyes of vile unbelievers.
Of course, this does not change the ultimate outcome (John 3:15, and the sad and horrible story of Mr. Dahmer remains one of the ultimate examples of the goodwill of Jesus (see also Jonah 4:2 and, what the heck, the whole Chapter!) towards those who discard sin and accept Him sincerely. The party when Mr. Dahmer entered Heaven must have been grandiose!

Luke 15:7
I say unto you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which need no repentance.




Yours in Christ,

Elmer

Dear Brother Elmer,


Thanks for the correction, but surely if that negro had been instructed to perform this brutal act of aggression then would it not be an execution. This negro buck was probably a low level gang member and was told to murder dear Brother Jeff. Please advise.


YIC
TT

[DemocratsAreHeretics]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

I really want to bring back Galileo because then I could beat his ass lol jk I am not going to do that, since that is against the word of God.

___________________________________

She lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses. Ezekiel 23:20

[Basilissa]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

I really want to bring back Galileo because then I could beat his ass lol jk I am not going to do that, since that is against the word of God.

Which part of your statement is against the Word of God, sweetie? Are you referring to a) you having some kind of lustful feelings towards a dude who's been rotting in the ground for a few hundred years (enough to want to bring him back to life), or b) having a weird wish of beating up the aforementioned rotten/decomposed by now dead body?

Please support your claim with appropriate Bible verse! You may want to read 1 Samuel 28, there's a story of a king who had the same unhealthy attraction towards the dead as you seem to have.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

I'm going to be honest here. I hope no one is praying that Jesus raise Billy Graham. He did no miracles and put off his death for so many years.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

Is there a restriction on nationality? A chat with Yasser Arafat would be interesting, especially what he spent his NOBEL PEACE PRIZE money on.

Yasser Arafat was chairman of the Palestine Liberation Organization
from 1969 until his death in 2004 a tumultuous period in which
clashes with neighboring Israel were prevalent.

[DolliMoans]

Re: Who are you praying for Jesus to raise from the dead this Easter?

I would love to get my little Modesty back, taken from us too soon, damaging certain financial prospects we were looking forward for.