Pentecostals Above Me

[BrotherLarry]

A new family moved in the apartment above me - oh why didn't I move before now - and I heard quite the uproar earlier this afternoon. So much so that I called the building security. I heard LOUD music by someone called The Crabb Family and lots of PRAISE JESUS and GLORY and speaking in tongues.


The security officer told me they were having a between services prayer meeting and they invited him in. They came home from Sunday morning worship and started praying and this noise was the result. Then they will go back this evening at 7 PM and have a "Sunday Night Praise Service." I was fine with the shouting until I heard all these strange language. I've shouted many a GLORY and HALLELUJAH in my apartment before, and I can't count the OH GOD's that I've sounded off. I don't know what to do to get them to move but I'm going to work on it. Please keep me in prayer as I fight the devil over undesirable neighbors yet one more time.

[Dennis Lukes]

Re: Pentecostals Above Me

Beware.

Here are some of the most famous Pentecostals:



Aimee Semple McPherson - who created a scandal by falsely claiming to have been kidnapped by beaners, died of a barbiturate overdose, and, worst of all, violated 1 Corinthians 14:34 by preaching in front of massive congregations in her megachurch.



Denzel Washington - (Pretty sure that's a picture of him), famous jigaboo and Obama supporter, magic negro in many Hellywood films as part of a Jewish plot to convince whites that negroes are just like us and aren't so bad.



Jim Jones - Marxist, negro-loving, drug-addicted, maniac charlatan cult leader. Brainwashed 900 coons and liberals into killing themselves, also had a congressman assassinated.


Pentecostals are dangerous freaks. They'll set snakes on you or go into some kind of retarded seizure and bite you and give you rabies or something. I would urge you to get them evicted by any means possible. Failing that, move out. If you need temporary lodging while looking for a new place, Christians are always welcome at my motel.

[Basilissa]

Re: Pentecostals Above Me

Pentecostals are so weird. The first time I saw one of these people start shaking, I was sure that she was suffering from an epilepsy attack or something, and I threw a bucket of water on her to make her come to her senses.... I was deeply hurt by the negative reaction to my selfless act of Good Samaritan, by these ungrateful people.

[Jim C. Lombardo]

Re: Pentecostals Above Me

Pentecostals are so weird. The first time I saw one of these people start shaking, I was sure that she was suffering from an epilepsy attack or something, and I threw a bucket of water on her to make her come to her senses.... I was deeply hurt by the negative reaction to my selfless act of Good Samaritan, by these ungrateful people.

Perhaps she was mad as you thwarted her in the middle of shape-shifting back into her true demon form. Sort of like the creature from The Thing.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Pentecostals Above Me

Wasn't Aimee Semple McPherson related somehow to the demonrat failed president James Earl Carter? She resembles him somewhat.


I do think you've made a faux pas with your picture of Denzel, though, Brother. If I'm not mistaken you've posted a photo of Will Ferrell - that actor from several Blaxpoitation films of the 30's and 40's. I'd never have known that without having AMC on my satellite TV.


I've hatched a plot to get these folks evicted - let's just hope it doesn't backfire since I've had similar complaints about ME from neighbors - but it's different since I'm a True Christian(TM). Praise God!

[Dennis Lukes]

Re: Pentecostals Above Me

Wasn't Aimee Semple McPherson related somehow to the demonrat failed president James Earl Carter? She resembles him somewhat.

Do you mean James Earl Ray? He wasn't a failure, he was a divinely-inspired American hero.

I do think you've made a faux pas with your picture of Denzel, though, Brother. If I'm not mistaken you've posted a photo of Will Ferrell - that actor from several Blaxpoitation films of the 30's and 40's. I'd never have known that without having AMC on my satellite TV.

Whoops, I think we're both wrong. My son, George Bush Lukes, informs me that the boy in the picture is actually Samuel L. Jackson. No big deal, those people all look alike.

I've hatched a plot to get these folks evicted - let's just hope it doesn't backfire since I've had similar complaints about ME from neighbors - but it's different since I'm a True Christian™. Praise God!

I'll pray for your success.