[juggalo]

Re: False Religions Register

No one can understand a word you're saying here, son. When you come down off your drugs, try again.

bloody sob why do you assume im high, triping or what ever?


"I have a question and another false religion"

that means i have a question and then another false religion for the register

"Warrior in Christ please do not insult me when I ask what is exactly evil about buhdists? beside the whole worships satan thing?" i was asking warrior not to insult me like you did and then i asked my question


"I thought they did not like violence in any size shape or form and they wont even preform surgery."

just some information i had heard


"And this might already be on here but here goes: Budists (not to be confused with Buhdists) They worship the Cannabis plant and satan"
the false religion

[Brother Temperance]

Re: False Religions Register

Yea, ol' uncle Al was a character, to say the least. I guess that being brought up in a filthy rich, Ultra-Conservative Xian household can do that to a person.

Uncle Al? What? I always thought that story about Pastor Pistle's Unsaved brother impregnating a sheep was just another foul liberal slander, but it appears I could be wrong...

I have a question and another false religion

Warrior in Christ please do not insult me when I ask what is exactly evil about buhdists? beside the whole worships satan thing?

Because worshipping Satan isn't enough?

I thought they did not like violence in any size shape or form and they wont even preform surgery.

In other words, they would happily leave you to die rather than operate on you, but they wouldn't try and fight against a bloodcrazed gook who was about to shoot 30 people? Does that sound moral to you?

bloody sob why do you assume im high, triping or what ever?

From the amount of tripe you have been posting, there can be no doubt whatsoever that you are tripping, and we assume you're high because we are full of Christian lovingkindness, and assuming you're mashed off your head on the Devil's Weed is more charitable than assuming that this is you functioning at full capacity.

[obadiah (On Moderation)]

Re: False Religions Register

Hi there y'all, I'ma kinda new aroun' heyah. I wanna know 1 ting did you all know I'm the only true kristen in da worl? God hates everybody but me SO THERE.

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: False Religions Register

Someone call a pastor! We have another malt-liquor-swilling, crack-snorting negro on our hands! I swear, they come out of the woodwork around this time of year.

[obadiah (On Moderation)]

Re: False Religions Register

Someone call a pastor! We have another malt-liquor-swilling, crack-snorting negro on our hands! I swear, they come out of the woodwork around this time of year.

First of all I'm no darkie! I just wanted to use non-standard English to get to see your true colors. Any way you NEVER snort crack, you smoke it. And I never swill anything I savor Good Single Malt Scotch Wiskey. And I don't live in the woodwork, I live in a multi million dollar mansion. Excuse me while I get another shot and Curse the Baptist Church. AND smoke my Big-A** cigar.

[OnYourKnees]

Re: False Religions Register

Someone call a pastor! We have another malt-liquor-swilling, crack-snorting negro on our hands! I swear, they come out of the woodwork around this time of year.

I believe she may, indeed, be the only Kristen around here, though.

So it could be that she speaks some truth!

I wonder why she thinks God hates everyone but her, when clearly this is God's Favorite Forum, filled with True Christians whom he loves dearly for obeying His every word.

[obadiah (On Moderation)]

Re: False Religions Register

I am a man, I was just joking before about being the only true Christian.

[OnYourKnees]

Re: False Religions Register

I am a man, I was just joking before about being the only true Christian.

So . . . either you lied before, and are a man and not named Kristen, or you're lying now.

You certainly know how to establish yourself as a respectable person quickly, especially on a Baptist Church forum.

[obadiah (On Moderation)]

Re: False Religions Register

So . . . either you lied before, and are a man and not named Kristen, or you're lying now.

You certainly know how to establish yourself as a respectable person quickly, especially on a Baptist Church forum.

My Oh My THOU DOST PROTEST TOO MUCH I did not say MY NAME was kristen, that was a play on words Christian/Kristen. Get it???
AND if you look at my profile, you'll see I have a man's name. Unless you think I'm a Lesbion trapped in a man's body. WAIT!?!! I am a lesbion trapped in a man's body... Oh my goddess, I mean god, Oh, Oh, I've been found out!

[obadiah (On Moderation)]

Re: False Religions Register

I am god's true profit. She is the true goddess, er,god!!! . I am the ninja of god's prosperity.

[obadiah (On Moderation)]

Re: False Religions Register

Um that was what used to happen in the Old Testament. I didnt say it was going to happen right now. Its what happens after u die and confront Jesus and asks u why u did that? I know these things slip out sometimes, but the way u say u guys cant sin is the problem. Also u say u are incapable of sinning, but the adds posted on ur front page say other wise. Why put a picture of wat is percieve as Jesus on underwear. Why must it be womens underwear as well. 1 simple way of expressing sin is, have u ever lied? Lying is a sin. A white lie is still a lie.


Also the most important thing im really looking for is what u believe will grant eternal life.

Dear Brother/sister Um, regardless of what the HEATHEN Baptists say, believe in your heart, nobody know's you but your heart. when you confront Jeesus, hit him upside the head with a baseball bat and drink a shot of whiskey. It'll calm you down. Jeesus doesn't mind, He forgives all sin. Just say " I'm sorry lord, I just had a conniption fit.

[obadiah (On Moderation)]

Re: False Religions Register

howdare you say I'm under investigation? Your'e crucifying me.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: False Religions Register

Dear Brother/sister Um, regardless of what the HEATHEN Baptists say, believe in your heart, nobody know's you but your heart. when you confront Jeesus, hit him upside the head with a baseball bat and drink a shot of whiskey. It'll calm you down. Jeesus doesn't mind, He forgives all sin. Just say " I'm sorry lord, I just had a conniption fit.

howdare you say I'm under investigation? Your'e crucifying me.

Are you finished now? All done with your childish display?

Friend, Jesus has drawn you here for some reason. I guess that reason is to hear the TRUTH about the Holy bible and God's plan for your Salvation. I'd suggest you read through these threads, read about our beliefs, and maybe even thumb through the Holy Word of God a bit before you run off half-cocked.

You see, Jesus never said that he'll accept your lies or jokes. Jesus cannot be fooled or tricked, and He HATES being mocked. He will certainly can and does forgive most sins (not all), but there are certain conditions. Its not a free-for-all. See the Bible for details.

You are under investigation by the DOF just as all newcomers are in God's favorite forum. We can't be too careful. We get all manner of unsaved scum in here, trying to mock Jesus and have a laugh at our expense. Well the joke won't seem so funny when those mockers are being sodomized by satan for all eternity, now will they? Are you seeking the Lord? If so, better get with the program. If not, your fate is written in the Holy Bible.

2 Chronicles 15:13
Whosoever would not seek the LORD God of Israel should be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman.

If you have respectful questions, feel free to ask. If you are just here to prove your ignorance and persecute us, then piss off.

[obadiah (On Moderation)]

Re: False Religions Register

Put my last joke on YOU UNSAVED TRASH.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: False Religions Register

Put my last joke on YOU UNSAVED TRASH.

That was your last joke, homer. I did warn you.