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  • Witch Hammer
    True Christian™
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 1717

    #1

    Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

    Myself, I use a good old fashioned knout. Nothin' says lovin' like a series of well placed blows with this baby:



    I've saved my wife and children from damnation and hellfire dozens of times with with it. Highly recommended!
  • Capt. Aaron Portway
    One of the Lord's Airborne Rangers
    Salvation from Above
    God's Favorite Pilot™
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2008
    • 6309

    #2
    Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

    One of the only good things I discovered when I was living in Fresno, CA was manzanita branches. God only lets manzanita grow in certain places, and the California foothills is one them. On my days off, I'd drive up into the foothills to get away from all the Mexicans, and there was manzanita growing EVERYWHERE.

    The wood is really hard, and the branches are really gnarly and twisted, making for a spread out contact area, leaving lots of minor bruises but no deep tissue damage!


    sigpic


    Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



    God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



    Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!

    Comment

    • Nobar King
      Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
      Christ's Guardian
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2007
      • 23748

      #3
      Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

      Nothing wrong with just using a wooden spoon.
      May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

      Comment

      • Billy Bob Jenkins
        Family Man of the Year 2010-2013
        About as Straight and Manly as you can get
        Hates anal sex. And trees.
        True Christian™
        • May 2010
        • 8337

        #4
        Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

        Nothing beats just laying her down flat, putting a washcloth over her face, and pouring a pitcher of water over her nose and mouth for a good solid minute or two.
        Last edited by Billy Bob Jenkins; 02-13-2013, 07:03 PM.
        The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!

        Comment

        • Jack O'fagan
          With faith as immovable as the Earth
          True Christian™
          • Feb 2011
          • 4836

          #5
          Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

          Originally posted by Witch Hammer View Post
          Myself, I use a good old fashioned knout. Nothin' says lovin' like a series of well placed blows with this baby:



          I've saved my wife and children from damnation and hellfire dozens of times with with it. Highly recommended!
          And of course something very similar was Jesus's weapon of choice when He needed to get 'tooled up'.

          John 2:15
          And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables;


          Plus swords, we all know He liked swords.

          YIC

          Jack
          Genesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.

          sigpic

          I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.

          Comment

          • lukasekman
            True Christian™
            True Christian™
            • Mar 2011
            • 614

            #6
            Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

            I use branches, PVC pipes and wooden spoons. My wife is also skilled in using the rolling pin when our kids distract her when baking.

            Thanks for the tip about manzanita branches. I'll try to get some of them for better discipline.

            sigpicCorporal Punishment Advisor, U.S. Department of Family Values
            Cyber-bullying Instructor, Christian Commission on Human Rights
            Apple CEO is gay - Important DFV security considerations
            Higgs field theory disproved - Universe is a cotton field
            Viagra forces man to have his penis amputated

            Comment

            • lukasekman
              True Christian™
              True Christian™
              • Mar 2011
              • 614

              #7
              Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

              Another good rod of correction is a dumbbell without attached plates (weight 5 lbs).

              sigpicCorporal Punishment Advisor, U.S. Department of Family Values
              Cyber-bullying Instructor, Christian Commission on Human Rights
              Apple CEO is gay - Important DFV security considerations
              Higgs field theory disproved - Universe is a cotton field
              Viagra forces man to have his penis amputated

              Comment

              • John Creeser
                Warning: In case of Rapture, this account will be unmanned.
                 
                • Aug 2009
                • 7248

                #8
                Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

                Originally posted by Nobar King View Post
                Nothing wrong with just using a wooden spoon.
                That brings back memories, Mom used this on me. Dad his leather belt, his confederate flag buckle belt is still embedded on my backside.

                I like to walk Abigail out into the forest where I pick a long spruce branch.

                "How's this one look Abigail? Fitting of a True Christian(tm)? Don't lie, it will only make it worse."

                I have her sit while and watch as I take my time stripping it of foliage to a fine tuned whispy wooden whip.

                The effectiveness of correction is outstanding!!
                -Every young man's battle - PORN AND MASTURBATION![/SIZE]
                -DISOWN your ATHEIST children - just like this good mother did!!

                -FINALLY!! Some rights for the rapists!!
                -There is no such thing as animal abuse!!
                -Pregnancy through RAPE is a GIFT from God
                -Keep the Fags out of the Boy Scouts!!
                -WIVES!! Stay in your abusive relationship!

                STOP, DROP & ROLL DOESN'T WORK IN HELL!!!!


                Comment

                • Mary Etheldreda
                  Gushing for Jesus
                   
                  • Sep 2011
                  • 23775

                  #9
                  Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

                  Originally posted by John Creeser View Post
                  I like to walk Abigail out into the forest where I pick a long spruce branch.

                  "How's this one look Abigail? Fitting of a True Christian™? Don't lie, it will only make it worse."
                  My husband allows me to go out and find a switch for him to use when he feels led by the Holy Spirit to offer some "corrective advice." If I t big find one that isn't adequate enough, he'll find a better one. My children have learned a valuable lesson themselves - don't let Father pick the switch! Find one first!




                  Personally, when disciplining my children, I like to be resourceful and use whatever is around.



                  Originally posted by John Creeser View Post
                  The effectiveness of correction is outstanding!!
                  Indeed! The LORD tells us the effectiveness of correction yields "peaceable fruit of righteousness." (Hebrews 12:11) Now who wouldn't want that in their family?
                  Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

                  Comment

                  • Levi Jones
                    Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
                    Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
                    Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
                     
                    • Jul 2009
                    • 13930

                    #10
                    Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

                    I say why mess with perfection? It was good enough for Abraham, Jesus and Moses.

                    It's good enough for my children.

                    Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

                    Comment

                    • Pastor Ezekiel
                      Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                       
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 78556

                      #11
                      Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

                      As many of you know, I am a collector....







                      Who Will Jesus Damn?

                      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                      Comment

                      • Sammy The Penitent
                        Forum Member
                        Forum Member
                        • Nov 2012
                        • 289

                        #12
                        Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

                        Originally posted by Witch Hammer View Post
                        Myself, I use a good old fashioned knout. Nothin' says lovin' like a series of well placed blows with this baby:



                        I've saved my wife and children from damnation and hellfire dozens of times with with it. Highly recommended!

                        These have become very popular in South Africa lately.

                        YIC
                        Attached Files
                        2 Samuel 11:13 And when David had called him, he did eat and drink before him; and he made him drunk: and at even he went out to lie on his bed with the servants of his lord, but went not down to his house.

                        Comment

                        • Alphonse Alban
                          Apostle to the Samites and Laplander Eskimos.
                           
                          • Feb 2011
                          • 5724

                          #13
                          Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

                          Originally posted by Sammy The Penitent View Post
                          These have become very popular in South Africa lately.

                          YIC
                          Hmm, apparently there is a whole magazine for that genre of rod of corrections. Maybe everything out of britland is not so bad after all.

                          Comment

                          • husbandslover
                            Forum Member
                            Forum Member
                            • Mar 2013
                            • 51

                            #14
                            Re: Rods of Correction...your personal favorites?

                            Originally posted by Witch Hammer View Post
                            Myself, I use a good old fashioned knout. Nothin' says lovin' like a series of well placed blows with this baby:



                            I've saved my wife and children from damnation and hellfire dozens of times with with it. Highly recommended!
                            Ouch! This looks quite painful! What is the name of this? I certainly would not want to be whipped by this!

                            Comment

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