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  • Mary Etheldreda
    Gushing for Jesus
     
    • Sep 2011
    • 23775

    #1

    Happy Birthday Brother Temperance!

    May you have a rich and joyous Birthday, and may God Bless You!

    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

  • Roland
    Obese Swedish Meatball
    Delusional Forum Member
    • May 2014
    • 2189

    #2
    Re: Happy Birthday Brother Temperance!

    Happy birthday Temperance.



    Kind regards,

    Roland
    Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.

    Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.

    Comment

    • Brother Temperance
      Senior Usher
      True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
      A very nice young man
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2006
      • 15621

      #3
      Re: Happy Birthday Brother Temperance!

      Sister Mary: thank you, and thank Jesus for blessing me with another year on this earth.

      Roland: I don't think I've encountered you before, but I cannot for the life of me understand why you would think it was appropriate to commemorate my birthday by posting a picture of a Muslim emerging from a cave. What is that supposed to signify?
      O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



      God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

      Comment

      • Roland
        Obese Swedish Meatball
        Delusional Forum Member
        • May 2014
        • 2189

        #4
        Re: Happy Birthday Brother Temperance!

        Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
        [...]

        Roland: I don't think I've encountered you before, but I cannot for the life of me understand why you would think it was appropriate to commemorate my birthday by posting a picture of a Muslim emerging from a cave. What is that supposed to signify?
        Hello Temperance,

        My focus was on the cute teddy bear. I thought you would like it. I still fail to find the Muslim in the picture though. If you really don´t like the picture I can post another one.

        Kind regards,

        Roland
        Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.

        Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.

        Comment

        • Daisy Mae Johnson
          The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
          Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
          aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
          True Christian™
          • Sep 2006
          • 15708

          #5
          Re: Happy Birthday Brother Temperance!





          sigpic

          Tweet me Here
          My GODLY Bio Here

          Comment

          • Ezekiel Bathfire
            Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
            Christ's Rottweiler
             
            • Jan 2008
            • 22855

            #6
            Re: Happy Birthday Brother Temperance!

            Your return after years struggling against the abominations of this life and preaching the Gospels to all who have ears has brought joy to my heart and, on this your birthday, it is this that I share with you together with an understanding expressed, accurately in your case, by Eusebius: “I myself have read the writings and teachings of the heretics, polluting my soul for a while with their abominable notions, though deriving this benefit: I was able to refute them for myself and loathe them even more.”
            sigpic


            “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

            Author of such illuminating essays as,
            Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

            Comment

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