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  • So called Pastor Eaten by Crocodiles



    God says this about crocodiles:


    Job 41


    3 Will he make many supplications unto thee? will he speak soft [words] unto thee?
    4 Will he make a covenant with thee? wilt thou take him for a servant for ever?
    5 Wilt thou play with him as [with] a bird? or wilt thou bind him for thy maidens?


    The answer to all these questions is a resounding No. Looks like they can't be trusted.


    sic [He promised he would demonstrate his faith to us today, but he unfortunately ended up drowning and getting eaten by 3 large crocodiles in front of us.]


    Obviously this man did not have faith in Our Lord.


    Hebrews 11:1 - Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.


    He hoped he could walk on water - he did not believe he could walk on water. He did not see the evidence of the things he could not see - so the crocodiles ate him. So it looks as though this nigra masquerading as a Pastor deserved what he got.


    YIC
    TT
    Isaiah 66:15

    For behold, the Lord wil come with fire, and with his charets like a whirlewinde, to render his anger with furie, and his rebuke with flames of fire.

  • #2
    Re: So called Pastor Eaten by Crocodiles

    It is said that God never sends us more than we can bear - I can bear the death of an outright fraud.

    These characters are a dime a dozen in "the Dark Continent" - cheap rabble-rousers with no faith in anything other than the money they can extract by scamming the gullible.

    Which reminds me - Landover needs $100,000 to provide a new venue for our own prayer warriors - without whose intervention most of the congregation would be suffering all the ills that atheists and catholics suffer - please give generously.
    sigpic


    “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

    Author of such illuminating essays as,
    Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: So called Pastor Eaten by Crocodiles

      Jesus has provided us with many glorious things - boats, airplanes, automobiles, jetskis, surfboards - but He does seem to guard His signature Miracle rather closely.
      Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
      brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
      ...and get off my lawn
      sigpic

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: So called Pastor Eaten by Crocodiles

        Crocodiles are known to enjoy eating humans. They eat more Africans every year than all the lions and cannibals put together. I think that it is unwise, under the circumstances, to get into any river called the Crocodile River and known to be full of crocodiles for any reason at all.
        God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: So called Pastor Eaten by Crocodiles

          Originally posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
          It is said that God never sends us more than we can bear - I can bear the death of an outright fraud.

          These characters are a dime a dozen in "the Dark Continent" - cheap rabble-rousers with no faith in anything other than the money they can extract by scamming the gullible.

          Which reminds me - Landover needs $100,000 to provide a new venue for our own prayer warriors - without whose intervention most of the congregation would be suffering all the ills that atheists and catholics suffer - please give generously.

          Brother Ezekiel,
          As the insurance premium on my dear lately departed wife has just payed out I may be in a position to help with the new venue. Please feel free to contact me and we can discuss it further.


          YIC
          TT
          Isaiah 66:15

          For behold, the Lord wil come with fire, and with his charets like a whirlewinde, to render his anger with furie, and his rebuke with flames of fire.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: So called Pastor Eaten by Crocodiles

            Many thanks - I hear you will be traveling to Las Vegas to help you recover from the grief - contact me when you get back.

            PS, what sort of a new wife are you looking for - I may be able to help.
            sigpic


            “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

            Author of such illuminating essays as,
            Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: So called Pastor Eaten by Crocodiles

              Originally posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
              Many thanks - I hear you will be traveling to Las Vegas to help you recover from the grief - contact me when you get back.

              PS, what sort of a new wife are you looking for - I may be able to help.

              Brother Ezekiel,


              Yes, I am of to Vegas, the home of the heathen Mormons, whilst I am there I intend to mission and provide fellowship for as many poor destitute souls as I possibly can. Once I return I will contact wrt the new center you are proposing. It seems like a financially sound prospect and I am rather excited to get it of the ground.


              As far as a new wife goes I am still considering options but any offers will be seriously considered.


              YIC
              TT
              Isaiah 66:15

              For behold, the Lord wil come with fire, and with his charets like a whirlewinde, to render his anger with furie, and his rebuke with flames of fire.

              Comment

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