X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 1
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous template Next
  • Talitha
    Deaconess
    Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
    True Christian™
    • Apr 2026
    • 15118
    #1

    Along came a Spider................

    The Lord sent a Spider as a message to the world warning of the Antichrist.



    Isaiah 59:4-6
    None calleth for justice, nor any pleadeth for truth: they trust in vanity, and speak lies; they conceive mischief, and bring forth iniquity.
    They hatch cockatrice' eggs, and weave the spider's web: he that eateth of their eggs dieth, and that which is crushed breaketh out into a viper.
    Their webs shall not become garments, neither shall they cover themselves with their works: their works are works of iniquity, and the act of violence is in their hands.


    .

    Sister Talitha

    Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


    HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
    being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41


    Tags: None
    • Father Maurice Lester
      Ring-kissing Papist dog
      • Sep 2006
      • 3366
      #2
      Re: Along came a Spider................

      Of course most people would be soiling their undergarments or at least loosing general control of their speech but this incident only shows once again how His Holiness The Pope is slicker than deer guts on a doorknob as one would expect from Christ's own earthly Vicar.

      From the days of hungry lions being set upon the first (Catholic) Christians right up until now we see just how faithful and devout real Christians can be when filled with the power and love of The Holy Spirit.

      Proof once again that The Pope is here to set a perfect example of Christian control and dedication.



      Bless you, my jealous Jezebel,
      Father Mo



      .
      A Cardinal in the making.

        Comment

        • Pastor Ezekiel
          Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
           
          • Sep 2006
          • 78556
          #3
          Re: Along came a Spider................

          Since it has already been well-established that the pope of Rome is the antichrist, it doesn't shock me at all to see him produce spiders from his person. It was a bit disconcerting to see it live on TV though.
          Who Will Jesus Damn?

          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

            Comment

            • Talitha
              Deaconess
              Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
              True Christian™
              • Apr 2026
              • 15118
              #4
              Re: Along came a Spider................

              I think it actually came out of hie left ear.
              No doubt there are hundreds if similar creatures living in his dried up old head.

              Here he is putting his eyeballs back in after releasing a swarm of Flies..........

              Click image for larger version Name: pope.jpg Views: 1 Size: 20.3 KB ID: 1908019

              Sister Talitha

              Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


              HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
              being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41


                Comment

                • Father Maurice Lester
                  Ring-kissing Papist dog
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 3366
                  #5
                  Re: Along came a Spider................

                  Originally posted by Talitha View Post
                  ...Here he is putting his eyeballs back in after releasing a swarm of Flies..........

                  [ATTACH]9986[/ATTACH]

                  No... he was answering the question of how many members of LBC can expect to go to Heaven.



                  Bless you, my pouty propagandist,
                  Father Mo



                  .
                  A Cardinal in the making.

                    Comment

                    • John Scopes
                      Unsaved Trash, Monkey worshiping Darwinista
                      • Sep 2009
                      • 666
                      #6
                      Re: Along came a Spider................

                      I realize this discussion is about arachnids, but I find some of the assertions being made to be quite fascinating.

                      For instance, what natural process is involved when an individual becomes internally infested with the aforementioned creatures ?

                      I find the ocular assertions to be the most interesting, what do you theorize the genetic changes required to accomplish this would have to be ?
                      sigpic
                      “Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge: it is those who know little, and not those who know much, who so positively assert that this or that problem will never be solved by science.” Charles Darwin The Descent of Man (1871)

                        Comment

                        • Ezekiel Bathfire
                          Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
                          Christ's Rottweiler
                           
                          • Jan 2008
                          • 22892
                          #7
                          Re: Along came a Spider................

                          Originally posted by John Scopes View Post
                          [...] I find the ocular assertions to be the most interesting, what do you theorize the genetic changes required to accomplish this would have to be ?
                          God did it.
                          sigpic


                          “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

                          Author of such illuminating essays as,
                          Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

                            Comment

                            • FoundGirlJNB
                              Found Sheep
                              Forum Member
                              • Sep 2009
                              • 351
                              #8
                              Re: Along came a Spider................

                              Originally posted by John Scopes View Post
                              I realize this discussion is about arachnids, but I find some of the assertions being made to be quite fascinating.

                              For instance, what natural process is involved when an individual becomes internally infested with the aforementioned creatures ?

                              I find the ocular assertions to be the most interesting, what do you theorize the genetic changes required to accomplish this would have to be ?
                              Typical train of thought for a Darwinist!!
                              You know what they say - if you can't dazzle them with your wit, confuse them with your B.S!
                              Psalm 1:5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgement, nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.

                                Comment

                                • Oakland "Reb" Griner
                                  True Christian™
                                  True Christian™
                                  • Jun 2009
                                  • 2241
                                  #9
                                  Re: Along came a Spider................

                                  I am surprised the Catholic heathens aren't building a shrine to the spider.

                                  Rare for them to miss an opportunity to commit idolatry.



                                  Jud 1:15 To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are unGodly among them of all their unGodly deeds which they have unGodly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which unGodly sinners have spoken against him.

                                    Comment

                                    • Unfalsifiable
                                      Forum Member
                                      Forum Member
                                      • Jan 2008
                                      • 836
                                      #10
                                      Re: Along came a Spider................

                                      What a surprise, the Pope is infested with arachnids.
                                      READ THE BIBLE

                                        Comment

                                        • Father Maurice Lester
                                          Ring-kissing Papist dog
                                          • Sep 2006
                                          • 3366
                                          #11
                                          Re: Along came a Spider................

                                          To be honest here we have been having a good chuckle over this whole spider (who we've named Boris) episode here in Vatican City. (I say city but it really is a country in some legal respect... as opposed to a county full of cow-corn in the middle of nowhere... but Je digress...)

                                          Even his Holiness has seen the video and laughed at the way the little spider tried to steal the spotlight... the Pope, like most Germans, has a great sense of humour and knows a belly laugh when he sees one.

                                          It's not like the time a pigeon soiled JP2 while speaking after Christmas Mass on the balcony and all of this shows what great bunch of self-deprecating and humble folks we have running the Church.



                                          Bless you, my hysterical hermaphrodites,
                                          Father Mo




                                          .
                                          A Cardinal in the making.

                                            Comment

                                            • Sungstra
                                              Unsaved trash
                                              • Sep 2009
                                              • 76
                                              #12
                                              Re: Along came a Spider................

                                              Aww I think it was just a coincidence....

                                              Sometimes people here go way too far into these things, it's like the people who believe they have seen the statue of Mary crying, or have seen the face of Jesus in a potato chip.

                                              But I don't see any hesitation in believe these things if it reinforces your faith in the bible.

                                                Comment

                                                Previous template Next
                                                Working...