X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • Luci Mourningstar
    True Christian™
    True Christian™
    • Dec 2009
    • 247

    #1

    Is God a PC or a Mac?

    1. Macs are beautiful and glimmery white in their design. Christ and God are always represented as the “light of the world.” PCs are often dark. God is definitely a Mac. 2. As soon as you own an iPhone you start to feel a potpourri of pity and shame for anyone who does not own one. Someone whips out a Blackberry and you immediately, smugly think inside, “That poor person. Pushing on physical keys. The horror.” God doesn’t like that arrogance. God is a PC.
    3. Apple makes real efforts to improve the planet and recycle their products. God loves that. God is a Mac.
    4. Apple is notorious for rejecting apps that people try to put on the iPhone. God doesn’t reject anyone. God is definitely a PC.
    5. PCs are often plagued by viruses and crashes. Much like sin, God hates that. God is definitely a Mac.
    6. Mac commercials are constantly mocking people who use PCs. God hates mockery. God is definitely a PC.
    7. You don’t have to learn a complicated operating system to use a Mac. You turn it on and go. Same with God. Repentance and salvation are not complex systems designed to confuse people. God’s a Mac.
    8. PCs are constantly needing to be upgraded and updated with the latest software and operating systems. Just like sanctification. You are constantly changing and being renewed. God’s a PC.
    9. Macs take a very holistic approach to computing. There’s iLife and iTunes and iPhone. They all work together seamlessly. Just the way God wants to be integrated into every part of our life. God’s a Mac.
    10. Some people treat Apple’s Steve Jobs like he’s God in a mock turtle neck. Turns out God is not cool with that. God’s a PC.
    11. Macs are very intuitive. When you want to do something, you don’t look up how to do it, you just do it. With a PC, things are often backwards. When you want to shut down for instance, you have to click “Start.” The Bible is very intuitive too. Proverbs lays out pages of simple wisdom that just makes sense. God is a Mac.
    12. Macs are all about outside appearances. They look fantastic. But God cares more about what’s inside. Macs are too vain. God’s a PC.
    13. Macs make music easy to enjoy. They’re more artistic and often the choice of graphic designers and photographers. God is a great fan of the arts, as evidence by the colorful sunsets and sunrises he paints each day. God’s a Mac.
    14. Macs are really expensive. God’s not. He paid the cost. He paid the debt we owed to him. God’s a PC.
    15. The Mac logo, an apple with a bite out of it, is reminiscent of our fall from grace in the garden of Eden and God’s forgiveness of us. God’s a Mac.
    16. The Gates Foundation has given millions and millions of dollars to help people around the world. God’s all about generosity. God’s a PC.
    17. Apple stores are not designed like traditional retail outlets, but are more like aesthetic sanctuaries. They’re practically consumer churches. God’s a Mac.
    18. Mac is constantly teasing us with information. There is a tablet. There’s not a tablet. God, on the other hand, is much more direct with his love and purpose in our lives. God’s a PC.
    There’s the list and I’ve got to tell you, I’m stuck. I have a PC desktop and an Apple laptop. I don’t know who to score this one as anything other than a tie. How about you?
    Is God a Mac or a PC?
    What evidence would you offer to support or deny either decision?
    http://stuffchristianslike.net/2010/01/debating-whether-god-is-a-mac-or-a-pc/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaig n=Feed%3A+stuffchristianslikeblog+(Stuff+Christian s+Like+-+Jon+Acuff)


    sigpic

    God loves me so much
    that he killed his only son so I can live forever.


  • klaangen
    Unsaved trash
    • Jan 2010
    • 36

    #2
    Re: Is God a PC or a Mac?

    Neither, God is a Lixus kinda dude....

    Comment

    • Daisy Mae Johnson
      The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
      Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
      aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2006
      • 15708

      #3
      Re: Is God a PC or a Mac?

      He's JesOs!!

      Attached Files
      sigpic

      Tweet me Here
      My GODLY Bio Here

      Comment

      • Gabriel Reproba
        Head Attorney of Landover's Legal Team
        The Most Honest Lawyer in America
        True Christian™
        • Nov 2009
        • 2479

        #4
        Re: Is God a PC or a Mac?

        Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post

        End of thread. Thank you, BTB!
        Yours In Christ,

        Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

        Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

        Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
        Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
        The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
        Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
        How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
        20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
        God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
        Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
        Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
        Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
        There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
        Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

        Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.

        Comment

        Working...