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  • Dr Awkward
    Unsaved trash
    Under Investigation
    • Dec 2007
    • 4

    #1

    Delusional To The Extreme

    It took me some time, after reading pages of forum posts here, before it began to sink in that you people take yourselves seriously. I kept saying to myself things like - any minute now I will load a page saying : "ha! the joke's on you!" But it never happened.

    One one hand I have to admire your sheer tenacity in pursuing these beliefs and life choices, although this admiration is the same sort I would have for a particularly dedicated and fastidious serial killer.

    Some points that have piqued my interest are in the discussions about science which members of this faith so readily refute. The mere fact that these discussions are taking place on the internet using computers fills me with such ironic glee it's almost too much.

    Then there's the whole flat Earth thing - you must have been really annoyed when deciding to take the bible literally as these sorts of things became apparent. Seeing your members argue over points like this is a real jaw dropping experience which demonstrates the absurd lengths humans will go to in order to validate their convictions.

    My conclusion is that members of this faith are similar to furries, plushies, people who love animals (I mean really love them), that guy who thinks reptiloids are in control and so on, in their sheer audacity in maintaining these delusions.
  • Brother Guy Bayard
    Anvil of the Antipodes
    True Christian™
    • Jul 2007
    • 1271

    #2
    Re: Delusional To The Extreme

    Why do you call yourself 'Dr"?
    Are you some sort of Scientist? Our text book is the Bible, just as your textbooks are 'your bible'.
    Ours was written by God. Yours were written by men.
    Your textbooks are being continually updated, changed, modified, and ultimately replaced with different ones.
    Our textbook has remained unchannged, and there are no plans to replace it with one that contains 'more up to date' information.
    (PS.I don't think you're a 'real' Doctor. You fake.)
    The devil, whose business is to pervert the truth, mimics the exact circumstance of the Divine Sacraments. He baptises his believers and promises forgiveness of sins...he celebrates the oblation of bread, and brings in the symbol of the resurrection. Let us therefore acknowledge the craftiness of the devil, who copied certain things of those that be divine."
    Tertullian (155-222 AD) from The Prescription Against Heretics' Ch XL

    Comment

    • lord warrior
      Confirmed Enemy of God
      • Sep 2007
      • 406

      #3
      Re: Delusional To The Extreme

      Then there's the whole flat Earth thing - you must have been really annoyed when deciding to take the bible literally as these sorts of things became apparent. Seeing your members argue over points like this is a real jaw dropping experience which demonstrates the absurd lengths humans will go to in order to validate their convictions.
      Oh yes, you must be one of them scitests. Well I can't help but notice you'all keep changing what you believe is right, and then got back the other way. [ Like with global warming] But our message hasn't changed in 2000 years.
      Just trust in God, with your whole heart, and he will show you the way.

      Comment

      • Wide-Open
        Director of European Evangelical Outreach
        A Shining Example of Christ's Love
        Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
        True Christian™
        • Nov 2007
        • 18449

        #4
        Re: Delusional To The Extreme

        Originally posted by lord warrior View Post
        [ Like with global warming]
        They even changed the name of their "religion", lord warrior... it's now called "climate change", So that if it gets really really cold again, they can blame CO2.
        Psalm 81:10:
        I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
        open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.

        Comment

        • Larry Lee
          Predestinated Servant of Jesus Christ by the Will of God
          True Christian™ Theologian
          True Christian™
          • Sep 2006
          • 4464

          #5
          Re: Delusional To The Extreme

          Originally posted by Dr Awkward View Post
          It took me some time, after reading pages of forum posts here, before it began to sink in that you people take yourselves seriously. I kept saying to myself things like - any minute now I will load a page saying : "ha! the joke's on you!" But it never happened.
          Ha ha ha ha Well, I like a good joke as much as the next fellow, but you're absolutely right in your perception that we here at Landover love the Lord God with all of our heart, soul and mind. We cannot do anything else -- AND THAT'S NO JOKE!

          Have you, Dr. Awkward, accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Saviour? It doesn't sound like you have. I can guarentee that once you let Him into your heart, you'll be one of us.
          sigpic

          I loved Newt before Newt was invincible

          Comment

          • Bobby-Joe
            Landover Security Superviser
            Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert
            NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
            True Christian™
            • Sep 2006
            • 18405

            #6
            Re: Delusional To The Extreme

            Originally posted by Dr Awkward View Post
            One one hand I have to admire your sheer tenacity in pursuing these beliefs and life choices, although this admiration is the same sort I would have for a particularly dedicated and fastidious serial killer.
            Friend,

            Is it wrong to want to be a good person? To what is right? To live in a good world? Are these not worthy goals? I mean were would we be if people just gave up. If the Pilgrims had been quiters and left America a wasteland filled with naked savages?

            The best way is not the easy way Dr Awkward.

            Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

            Hot Must ReadThreads!


            Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

            Comment

            • Dr Awkward
              Unsaved trash
              Under Investigation
              • Dec 2007
              • 4

              #7
              Re: Delusional To The Extreme

              Originally posted by Brother Guy View Post
              Why do you call yourself 'Dr"?
              Are you some sort of Scientist? Our text book is the Bible, just as your textbooks are 'your bible'.
              Ours was written by God. Yours were written by men.
              Your textbooks are being continually updated, changed, modified, and ultimately replaced with different ones.
              Our textbook has remained unchannged, and there are no plans to replace it with one that contains 'more up to date' information.
              (PS.I don't think you're a 'real' Doctor. You fake.)
              You speak of change like it's a bad thing, if it weren't for mans ability to change we wouldn't be here having this discussion. I don't call myself "Dr", my nicname, Dr Awkward, was chosen because I like palindromes.

              Comment

              • Pastor Ezekiel
                Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                 
                • Sep 2006
                • 78556

                #8
                Re: Delusional To The Extreme

                Originally posted by Dr Awkward View Post
                I like palindromes.
                So does satan.

                Allah la valhalla.

                We panic in a pew.

                Evil I did dwell, lewd did I live.

                Am God: Dogma!

                Dogma in my hymn: I am God.

                Deirdre wets altar of St. Simons - no mists, for at last ewer dried.

                I, Rasputin, knit up Sari.

                God! A red nugget! A fat egg under a dog!

                "Reviled did I live," said I, "as evil I did deliver."

                Satan, oscillate my metallic sonatas.

                O Memsahib, Bart! Rabbi has memo!

                Amen enema.
                I will thank you to NOT post in demoncode here in God's favorite forum.
                Who Will Jesus Damn?

                Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                Comment

                • One-eyed Jack
                  True Christian™
                  True Christian™
                  • Nov 2007
                  • 1092

                  #9
                  Re: Delusional To The Extreme

                  Uh-oh. Wordplay. I better not get involved.

                  Repent, DrAwkward! Repent!

                  ~~ OEJ

                  Comment

                  • Dr Awkward
                    Unsaved trash
                    Under Investigation
                    • Dec 2007
                    • 4

                    #10
                    Re: Delusional To The Extreme

                    This site is awesome, I haven't been fooled by an internet parody ever until this. Haha, kudos to those responsible, keep up the good work. I love a bit of subversion now and then.

                    (That'll teach me for not doing my research)

                    Comment

                    • Dr Awkward
                      Unsaved trash
                      Under Investigation
                      • Dec 2007
                      • 4

                      #11
                      Re: Delusional To The Extreme

                      I wonder what other words apart from UNCHRISTIAN WORD DELETED your site changes, that's just awesome.

                      EDIT: Do not repeat our enemies lies on our forum Dr Awkward. BJ

                      Comment

                      • Sister Noddy
                        True Christian™
                        True Christian™
                        • Jun 2007
                        • 1843

                        #12
                        Re: Delusional To The Extreme

                        Originally posted by Dr Awkward View Post

                        This site is awesome, I haven't been fooled by an internet divine revelation ever until this. Haha, kudos to those responsible, keep up the good work. I love a bit of subversion now and then.

                        (That'll teach me for not doing my research)
                        You are going to hell when you die, you know that, don't you? God would like you to repent and accept Jesus' sweet love, but in the end after you've had all the chances you're ever gonna get, he will say he never knew you. You won't be loving it so much when you are doggie-paddling satan's lakes of fire, will you, awkward person?
                        1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
                        1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...


                        1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...

                        Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
                        Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...

                        Comment

                        • Brother Lindh
                          Confirmed Enemy of God
                          BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                          • Feb 2007
                          • 130

                          #13
                          Re: Delusional To The Extreme

                          Well, Dr Awkward, meet another Landover Church goer. I am Brother Lindh and I live under the Landover sanctuary in the crypts (never go hungry here). Pastor Pistle saved me and gave me a home here after I sent him $10. Cheap for the price I say. I only have one complaint about the members here, or some of them, I should say. Their avatars show such succulent necks. Of course I don't bother anyone during daylight hours. Praise Jesus!

                          Comment

                          • eliot mayfield
                            God Squad
                            True Christian™
                            • Sep 2006
                            • 9324

                            #14
                            Re: Delusional To The Extreme

                            Originally posted by Brother Lindh View Post
                            Well, Dr Awkward, meet another Landover Church goer. I am Brother Lindh and I live under the Landover sanctuary in the crypts (never go hungry here). Pastor Pistle saved me and gave me a home here after I sent him $10. Cheap for the price I say. I only have one complaint about the members here, or some of them, I should say. Their avatars show such succulent necks. Of course I don't bother anyone during daylight hours. Praise Jesus!
                            speaking of delusional to the extreme.
                            Matthew:
                            5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                            5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                            10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                            10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                            sigpic

                            Comment

                            • One-eyed Jack
                              True Christian™
                              True Christian™
                              • Nov 2007
                              • 1092

                              #15
                              Re: Delusional To The Extreme

                              Indeed, DrAwkward, we will "keep up the good work" of the LORD! For the Great Work of Salvation is real as Jesus' blood and serious as God's prohibition on eating snails.

                              These also shall be unclean unto you among the creeping things that creep upon the earth; the weasel, and the mouse, and the tortoise after his kind,

                              And the ferret, and the chameleon, and the lizard, and the snail, and the mole.
                              Leviticus 11:29, 30

                              This is VERY IMPORTANT! God says eating snails is an abomination, and therefore the snail-chomping Frenchies are doomed to be damned!

                              Also, since God prohibits eating seafood that has not fins and scales, those abominable sushi dishes that include octopus (DEVILFISH!) and squid are certain to result in eternal damnation!

                              These ye shall eat of all that are in the waters: all that have fins and scales shall ye eat:

                              And whatsoever hath not fins and scales ye may not eat; it is unclean unto you. Deuteronomy 14:9, 10


                              This is a slippery slope, DrAwkward, and the dark, dim slipperiness of snails and octopi is the very slime of evil!


                              Evil amid tons 'o snot: dim, alive!

                              Hope you stick around and enjoy our Godly preachments. Praise ye the Lord!


                              ~~ OEJ

                              Comment

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