foul internet demon!

[barton]

I encountered my first internet demon just now. I don't even know what to do about it. It's not a human we can stone to death, after all. Perhaps a Church elder could address this abomination?

The demon's name is Akinator... and it's foul address is here: WARNING, GIRD LOINS BEFORE CLICKING It seems to read minds! Judging from comments I've been reading, it is no joke either. It seems to enjoy poisoning the minds of children the most but I found there are victims of all ages.

I did not dialogue with the demon to see for myself, I immediately felt the wrongness of that place and quickly clicked the red x on my browser. I cleared the cache and wiped my free space but I may have to reinstall Windows... I'm just not sure if any remnants of that demon are lying in wait somewhere on my hard drive.

If anyone can suggest a Christian drive scanner/cleaner, I'd sure appreciate it.

[Talitha]

Re: foul internet demon!

I cannot even see a link brother.

You need to use the JesOS Operating system to protect against such things.

[barton]

Re: foul internet demon!

I cannot even see a link brother.

Wow! Your computer is clearly blessed by the Lord. I can only wonder at the Godly routines it employs in protecting you from harm!

You need to use the JesOS Operating system to protect against such things.

I would like to buy a copy, if possible. Can I do it by mailorder or do I need to get it from the church giftshop, in person? I'm planning a trip to Iowa next year but maybe I shouldn't wait that long?

[Unfalsifiable]

Re: foul internet demon!

Is it one of those shock videos? The guy looks like he's going to explode at any moment.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: foul internet demon!

Try http://us.akinator.com/ a remarkable piece of devilry. The beast sees into your very soul and he is clearly an islamofascist. However, there is weakness and imperfection in his ways, hence we know he is of Satan: he has to ask you your name, age and sex!

[James Hutchins]

Re: foul internet demon!

Wow! Your computer is clearly blessed by the Lord. I can only wonder at the Godly routines it employs in protecting you from harm!
I would like to buy a copy, if possible. Can I do it by mailorder or do I need to get it from the church giftshop, in person? I'm planning a trip to Iowa next year but maybe I shouldn't wait that long?

The JesOs is only available to True Christians(tm). It can be ordered by phone, mail or picked up in person from the Church Office only after the requisite paperwork has been checked by Miss Cookie and signed off by the Pastor or Reverend who was your spiritual adviser making the transition from Forum member to True Christian(tm). The JesOs is only one of the perks that await the dedicated God fearing believers.

[SoulMan]

Re: foul internet demon!

The JesOs is only available to True Christians™. It can be ordered by phone, mail or picked up in person from the Church Office

It's freely avaliable on torrents.

[barton]

Re: foul internet demon!

Try http://us.akinator.com/ a remarkable piece of devilry. The beast sees into your very soul and he is clearly an islamofascist. However, there is weakness and imperfection in his ways, hence we know he is of Satan: he has to ask you your name, age and sex!

Yes, that's the beast. Can it be cast out of the internet? Should it be? I'm not learned enough to be able to discern the answer myself... I just know to avoid going there. I did find the following account of an interaction with it where the answer was God, though:

Question "Answer given" "Answer expected"
Is your character real? Yes Don't know
Is your character an actor? No No
Has your character ever been married? No No
Is your character an adult man? No No
Is your character famous? Yes Yes
Is your character a singer? No No
Is your character a female? No No
Does your character stand on two legs? Probably No
Is your character an animal? No No
Is your character a human being? No No
Does your character have seductive powers? No No
Is your character famous for having created the world? Yes Yes
Does your character have a son? Yes Yes
Does your character write webcomics? No No
Does your character fight with an unusual weapon? No No
Is your character's wife famous? No No
Is your character confident? Yes Yes
Is your character a doctor? No No
Does your character have Asian origins? No No

Note how subtly the demon manipulates things by saying the "expected answer" as to whether or not God exists is "don't know".

[BelieverInGod]

Re: foul internet demon!

Try http://us.akinator.com/ a remarkable piece of devilry. The beast sees into your very soul and he is clearly an islamofascist. However, there is weakness and imperfection in his ways, hence we know he is of Satan: he has to ask you your name, age and sex!

I stumped it, I was thinking of Ivan the Terrible and it gave me Friedrich II. I guess the Blood of Jesus protected me from its powers.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: foul internet demon!

It had to go a second round to get to mine; I was after Ulysses/Odysseus, it first gave me Jason, leader of the Argonauts.

What it seems to have gotten wrong is that it used the name Odysseus (I gave it credit, same person) instead of Ulysses, which is of course the title of two movies.

Has your character really existed?NoNo
Is your character a human being?YesYes
Is your character a citizen of the United-States?NoNo
Is your character from an anime (Japanese animation)?NoNo
Is your character from a video game?NoNo
Does your character live in England?NoNo
Is your character an adult man?YesYes
Has your character been into space?NoNo
Does your character fight with a sword?YesYes
Does the name of your character appear in the title of a movie?YesNo
Is your character from a Walt Disney animated feature?NoNo
Does your character fight against monsters?YesYes
Is your character a barbarian?NoNo
Does your character have an evil sibling?NoNo
Is your character black-haired?YesDon't know
Does your character appear in a real work inside a real work?No?
Is your character Japanese?NoNo
Is your character a sailor or a pirate?YesYes
Is your character from the the Persian Gulf states?NoNo
Does your character read comics?NoNo

Break when it offered Jason.

Is your character a war veteran?YesYes
Does your character have a flame tattoo?No?
Is your character part of folklore?YesYes
Does your character live in a container of some sort?No?
Is your character known for making sound effects with their mouth?No?
Does your character have a goatee?NoNo
Does your character live in the forest?No?
Does your character play chess?No?
Does your character look like a hero?YesNo
Does your character seek vengeance?NoNo

[Lisa H]

Re: foul internet demon!

I tried playing with the demon. I was trying so see if it could guess I picked myself. It failed.

[barton]

Re: foul internet demon!

I give you all credit for bravery, standing up to such evil power.

I wonder if this is a way to destroy it? Perhaps I can spend time there undermining it's knowledge, which is the source of its power. It seeks to absorb life/knowledge from everyone that approaches. Maybe its own rapacity will be its downfall. It won't know it's been poisoned until it's too late.

[Lisa H]

Re: foul internet demon!

I give you both credit for bravery, standing up to such evil power.

I wonder if this is a way to destroy it? Perhaps I can spend time there undermining it's knowledge, which is the source of its power. It seeks to absorb life/knowledge from everyone that approaches. Maybe its own rapacity will be its downfall. It won't know it's been poisoned until it's too late.

Like all demons it is scared of the powers of God and is unable to have power over you unless you let it.

[despising david]

Re: foul internet demon!

I stumped it, I was thinking of Ivan the Terrible and it gave me Friedrich II. I guess the Blood of Jesus protected me from its powers.

I got it too!! I was thinking of Jerry Seinfeld and it gave me robert downey Jr. I did just happen to spend my day recording some good Christian country music with my band, maybe I was still feeling the lord course through my ears!

[Lycia The Repentant]

Re: foul internet demon!

Friends! Even though you are trying to trip up the demon, I am still shocked and appalled you are playing with it!

"Regard not them that have familiar spirits, neither seek after wizards, to be defiled by them: I am the LORD your God." Leviticus 19:31

"And the soul that turneth after such as have familiar spirits, and after wizards, to go a whoring after them, I will even set my face against that soul, and will cut him off from among his people." Leviticus 20:6

"A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them." Leviticus 20:27

"When thou art come into the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee, thou shalt not learn to do after the abominations of those nations. There shall not be found among you any one that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire, or that useth divination, or an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch. Or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer. For all that do these things are an abomination unto the LORD: and because of these abominations the LORD thy God doth drive them out from before thee." Deuteronomy 18:9-12

I accidentally clicked on the link at first. Rest assured I threw my brand new Laptop out of the window and am now using my trusty old Commodore 64.