[Glendora Christianson]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

If I didn't know better, I'd say this is the climax before the demon comes spewing out of Mz. Bombhellsinker. She's babbling Biblical verses and claiming not to be a harlot. Sure, she's still defiant, but I think we're making genuine progress here. GLOATING GLYNNDIE

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

My what an interesting discussion...so Mary wasn't a virgin when she married Joseph & JC was in fact a bastard.

No Mary was a still a vigin because The Holy Spirit "came upon her", not "came in her". That important differance preserved her virginity.

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

Your god is male, right? So then if that were the case, if all True Christians™ are married to god would that make all the male True Christians™ 'homers'?

Watch your mouth, woman. Jesus has banned people for less.

There is a unique and very special relationship that exists between every True Christian™ and Jesus. That very special relationship is called "espousal." and a Biblical espousal is just as binding as a marriage.

We are espoused to a living Bridegroom, who loves us with an everlasting love. The bridegroom's father has selected the bride (Matthew 16.18), the father has paid the dowry (1 Cor 6.20, 1 Peter 1.18-19) and the bridegroom has given His pledge-gift (John 14:16), so now we are "sealed with that holy Spirit of promise" (Eph. 1:13). PRAISE! He pledged Himself to us. He gave Himself for us. We wear His ring.

The Song of Solomon describes the passion of the bride (i.e. the True Christian™ Church) waiting for her bridegroom. Jesus never married prior to the Cross, but soon He shall return and take His bride home to His father's house.

Song of Solomon 3:1 By night on my bed I sought him whom my soul loveth: I sought him, but I found him not.

Song of Solomon 2:4 He brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

Also remember God could not have possibly married Mary because that would be incest (Mary being Jesus' mother, Jesus being God).

[Dukie]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

Jesus will laugh when he asks you why you thought He wouldn't get into Heaven just before he pulls the clouds right out from under your feet, watching you tumble straight down to the desolate shores of the lake of fire where a horde of horny demons await your ample rectum. we'll all look down on you and giggle as they rip you to shreds and you screech for your soul. then you'll realize satan doesn't have ears for your gruesome sounds of pain. PRAISE!

[lilith]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

No Mary was a still a vigin because The Holy Spirit "came upon her", not "came in her". That important differance preserved her virginity.

And you know this how?
Not being there at the time (unless there's something you're not telling us & you're way overdue for your pension) you can't possibly know.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

And you know this how?
Not being there at the time (unless there's something you're not telling us & you're way overdue for your pension) you can't possibly know.

God was there Lilith and he wrote it down.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

Watch your mouth, woman. Jesus has banned people for less.

There is a unique and very special relationship that exists between every True Christian™ and Jesus. That very special relationship is called "espousal." and a Biblical espousal is just as binding as a marriage.

We are espoused to a living Bridegroom, who loves us with an everlasting love. The bridegroom's father has selected the bride (Matthew 16.18), the father has paid the dowry (1 Cor 6.20, 1 Peter 1.18-19) and the bridegroom has given His pledge-gift (John 14,16), so now we are "sealed with that holy Spirit of promise" (Eph. 1:13). PRAISE! He pledged Himself to us. He gave Himself for us. We wear His ring.

Are you calling yourself a bride? I'm sorry, PD, but it sounds like what it sounds like!

Also remember God could not have possibly married Mary because that would be incest (Mary being Jesus' mother, Jesus being God).

The bible speaks of god and jesus being two separate beings. How could god 'father himself'?

And you're forgetting the point.

NEITHER GOD NOR JOSEPH WAS MARRIED TO MARY. THE BIRTH WAS ILLEGITIMATE.
Although it seems what you're saying is that the laws of your god apply to all but him!

[lilith]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

Are you calling yourself a bride? I'm sorry, PD, but it sounds like what it sounds like!


The bible speaks of god and jesus being two separate beings. How could god 'father himself'?

And you're forgetting the point.

NEITHER GOD NOR JOSEPH WAS MARRIED TO MARY. THE BIRTH WAS ILLEGITIMATE.
Although it seems what you're saying is that the laws of your god apply to all but him!

Prune Danish...as a bride



BJ:"god was there & he wrote it down?"

And you know THIS how?

[SalvationSeeker]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

BJ:"god was there & he wrote it down?"

And you know THIS how?

Because we have what He wrote down; The book of Genesis in the KJV1611 Bible. duh!

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

Are you calling yourself a bride? I'm sorry, PD, but it sounds like what it sounds like!


The bible speaks of god and jesus being two separate beings. How could god 'father himself'?

Yes and they are also the same being too. What is so difficult about that?

And you're forgetting the point.

NEITHER GOD NOR JOSEPH WAS MARRIED TO MARY. THE BIRTH WAS ILLEGITIMATE.
Although it seems what you're saying is that the laws of your god apply to all but him!

Listen Van Hellspanker this isn't some kind of depraved wicker thing, no way is a Good Christian (which Jesus is) is going to marry his own mother. If God married Mary that means He would be 'knowing his own father's skirt'. Just sick. It is bad enough you wicker keep on suggesting Jesus is something out of a bad zombie movie; comes back from the dead and spreading His condition orally, but saying He should marry His own mother is too much!

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

Are you calling yourself a bride? I'm sorry, PD, but it sounds like what it sounds like!

What does it mean that the church is the bride of Christ?

Answer: The body of Christ is identified as those who have trusted in Jesus Christ as their personal savior and have been given the Holy Spirit to indwell them. The scriptures are clear that since the day of Pentecost in Acts 2, all believers are placed into the body of Christ by the baptizing of the Holy Spirit. So all believers today are in the body of Christ as Ephesians 4 states.

The bride of Christ speaks of the same persons mentioned above but is really a looking ahead to the time when we will be united with Jesus our groom. The bride is to prepare for her wedding by keeping herself pure and focused on the groom. The New Jerusalem is compared to the bride because of it’s beauty but is never said to be the actual bride. The bride will be brought into the New Jerusalem by the groom as often is the case of the carrying over the threshold to their new abode. Here are some verses that help clarify the concepts discussed earlier:


1 Corinthians 12:27 – You are the body of Christ – speaking of the church and those who have been given spiritual gifts.

Ephesians 4:12 – The edifying of the body of Christ is the reason we are equipped to minister, earlier in the beginning of this chapter is the discussion on who is in the body – one faith one baptism.

Rev. 21:2 – The new Jerusalem is beautifully adorned as a bride because it will be the home of His bride.

Rev. 21:9 – The bride is said to be the Lamb’s wife.

Rev. 22:17 – The Spirit and the bride say to the bridegroom, “come.”

John 3:29 – John the Baptist does not seem to be included as the bride.

Ephesians 5:25-28 – The discussion of husbands and wives. Jesus sets the example by how he loved the church and gave himself for it. Church must equal wife.

Revelation 19:7-9 – The marriage of the Lamb, the wife is dress in fine linen, clean and white which is the righteousness of the saints.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

Yes and they are also the same being too. What is so difficult about that?

Because you insist you are monotheists, yet at the same time this suggests polytheism, not to mention in the bible when Jesus prays to and talks to his FATHER....not to himself. And he refers to himself as 'the son' not 'the one'.

Listen Van Hellspanker this isn't some kind of depraved wicker thing, no way is a Good Christian (which Jesus is) is going to marry his own mother. If God married Mary that means He would be 'knowing his own father's skirt'. Just sick. It is bad enough you wicker keep on suggesting Jesus is something out of a bad zombie movie; comes back from the dead and spreading His condition orally, but saying He should marry His own mother is too much!

Whereas the idea of a one night stand with his own mother is perfectly acceptable. old

Prune....you can call it whatever you like, it still sounds like what it sounds like!

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

Whereas the idea of a one night stand with his own mother is perfectly acceptable. old

Prune....you can call it whatever you like, it still sounds like what it sounds like!

Madame, you are burrowing yourself into a deep hole in HELL from which you will never escape without some serious help and a HUGE tithe!

The filthy act of sex was invented by GOD in order to help keep track of the long genealogies involved. You can read them here, although GOD later tells us not to bother with long genealogies because they take time away from the business of collecting tithes in church:

http://www.parentalguide.com/Documents/Jesus_Desk/Jesus_Chronology.htm

They were necessary at the time in order to track bastards for ten generations to make sure they were not permitted in the house of the Lord.

Now, back to your point. GOD HIMSELF does not have sex with anyone! He creates things from dust and old bones and then kills them later to get their souls. So it is pretty obvious that any discussion involving sex and the LORD is merely gossip and women are directed NOT TO GOSSIP! In fact, Romans 1:26-32 lists gossips in the same context as homers and lezbeans!

REMEMBER JAMES 3:5-6

3:5 Even so the tongue is a little member, and boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth!
3:6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.

GOD SAYS NOT TO SET YOUR TONGUE LOOSE AMONG OUR MEMBERS!

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Would even Jesus get into heaven?

I was being sarcastic. The point being, that I was making the point that an illegitimate birth is an illegitimate birth, and it's just another biblical atrocity for the action to be damned down to 'the 10th generation' yet to do that very same thing.