[Oceanwander]

Re: My wife has vanished.

Especially now the pizza has arrived.

Pizza Drivers have to endure sleet, rain and now. The put put more wear and tear on their cars then other people. They also have to deal with all kids of ungodly people and even risk being robbed. Not to mention, they also make below minimum wage and rely on tips for income.

I hope you had a Christian Tract handy to give him for a tip.

[Catherine Moore]

Re: My wife has vanished.

I just had a terrible thought Brother.

Your dear Nephew, of whom you think so much - he wasn't on her side of the family was he? You'll still have regular and repeated access to him?

[WWJDnow]

Re: My wife has vanished.

I hope it's not the Rapture. I'd hate to be left behind.

[Adam Fag]

Re: My wife has vanished.

Now, if I can just work out this washing machine.

There's a pair of "beauty therapists" spare up here who know how to wash things out, I could send them down to you if you like.

I'll give them a car too to get rid of them..

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: My wife has vanished.

It arrived promptly and was received with thanks at this difficult time.

It is at times like these that I thank God for my faith.

YIC

I will pray that your pizzas are always delivered hot.

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: My wife has vanished.

Cheers, Brother! (You did get beer too, right?)

It arrived promptly and was received with thanks at this difficult time.

It is at times like these that I thank God for my faith.

YIC

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: My wife has vanished.

Well, she certainly would passive-aggressively ignore my effective rebukes and sermons.

I'm beginning to think I may be better off without her.

Especially now the pizza has arrived.

YIC

Cheers, Brother! (You did get beer too, right?)

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: My wife has vanished.

Well, she certainly would passive-aggressively ignore my effective rebukes and sermons.

I'm beginning to think I may be better off without her.

Especially now the pizza has arrived.

YIC

Brother Niles, as you live in Godless England, is there any way you can earn some well-deserved wages from this traumatic event?

[Noah Sole]

Re: My wife has vanished.

As ever the Good Book (The Bible KJV1611) is the only comfort a man needs!

Amen
And of course there is also:

Proverbs 21:19
It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: My wife has vanished.

I am please that you are taking note of

Proverb:21:9: It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.

As ever the Good Book (The Bible KJV1611) is the only comfort a man needs!

YIC

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: My wife has vanished.

I am please that you are taking note of

Proverb:21:9: It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: My wife has vanished.

You never mentioned that she was abusive! Was it bad?

My experience is that women can use passive-aggressive behavior very effectively. This is because they are basically born without morals; hence Eve in the Garden.

Well, she certainly would passive-aggressively ignore my effective rebukes and sermons.

I'm beginning to think I may be better off without her.

Especially now the pizza has arrived.

YIC

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: My wife has vanished.

Unfortunately there is not a great deal that I can do about it. She wants a divorce and will be citing so called 'abusive behaviour'.

You never mentioned that she was abusive! Was it bad?

My experience is that women can use passive-aggressive behavior very effectively. This is because they are basically born without morals; hence Eve in the Garden.

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: My wife has vanished.

As you have not committed adultery, I do not see how divorce is possible.
So you've not really lost anything.

Are there no nigras in your area? They work for all but free - but you have to watch them as they steal and break things.

I've seen Mrs Bathfire at the oven, you just put things in and they get cooked.

Unfortunately there is not a great deal that I can do about it. She wants a divorce and will be citing so called 'abusive behaviour'. She is using the incidents with the flannel and her so called limp as supporting evidence.

But if I just go with it I get to keep the car.

There are very few darkies in Plymouth but Poles are two a penny and work really hard for very little and besides I can understand what they say but I don't speak 'street'.

I think I might just have eat out until I can hire a house keeper.

When will women realise they can hurt people with their self centred insistance on putting themselves first?

Well, I've learnt my lesson.

TIC

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: My wife has vanished.

It seems she wants to disolve our marriage and has already 'taken steps', what ever that means.

As you have not committed adultery, I do not see how divorce is possible.

The deal is I let her go with out a fuss and I get to keep the 1997 VW Polo worth £800.

So you've not really lost anything.

I'm thinking that £800 could get me more than a few months service from a house keeper (as long as I go with Pole (I've heard they are hard working and very servile)).

Are there no nigras in your area? They work for all but free - but you have to watch them as they steal and break things.

I better figure out this oven.

YIC

I've seen Mrs Bathfire at the oven, you just put things in and they get cooked.