[Mary Etheldreda]

Actor Bernard Hill, best known for roles in Titanic and Lord of the Rings, has died aged 79.



I'm not sure how I feel about this because I never watched The Titanic Boat Show, but Lord of the Rings was clearly an advertisement for the Catholic Church. Think about it, Frodo has to destroy the ring despite Gandalf's ability to communicate with giant eagles who could have just done him a favor, and Sam could carry Frodo who was carrying the ring so the ring clearly wasn't dangerous to be around when removed by one hobbit. Frodo is an allegory for the Catholic priest who is the only one allowed to administer the sacraments, despite even the most feeble fool being fulling capable of picking up flavorless crackers by their own strength. Also this is why Frodo looked like a perpetual boy. It was the only way to get the priests into the movie theater.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

…………………………………………so-o-o, how many popes is that now?

Frank Liar =1 (he lies when he says The Bible does not prohibit what he does)
Coptic Pope = 2 (recently bumped up from 3rd place)
Sedevacantist Pope = 3 (no idea who this is but there could be more than one contender)

Wasn't Frank going to retire? That would create an opening for a fourth again, again. It's difficult to think of a more despicable position to apply for. What's really needed is a Baptist pope.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

GLORY GLORY

Mr. Ratzinger, the man (?) previously known as the Pope is DEAD!

Mr. Ratzinger, who used the alias "Benedict XVI" kicked the bucket at the unnatural age of 95. Why would he die so soon after the "Queen" Elizabeth died? No-one knows but it cannot have been a coincidence. Mr. Benedict exemplified the nauseating aspects of the Catlick cult, the organization that has for millennia concentrated on reaching the masses of altar boys with sturdy, homosexual sodomistic male copulatory organs. In addition , they have dismissed Jesus as the only and one and only Way to Eternal Enjoyment! In fact, the popes have for decades taught us that Christ is unnecessary, as stated in the evil catechism:

The plan of salvation also includes those who acknowledge the Creator, in the first place amongst whom are the Muslims; these profess to hold the faith of Abraham, and together with us they adore the one, merciful God, mankind's judge on the last day.

Obviously, Jesus disagrees:

John 14:6
Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

Everyone knows that Ratzinger was the model for the worst movie franchise ever, the "Star Wars" heresy, where he modelled the Emperor Palpating.


Jesus must be rejoicing and laughing in earnest joy as He is RIGHT NOW watching Mr. Benedict receive his first tungsten enemas in terrible but well-deserved agony in Hell! Great days for us, and for Catholics a fitting ending to their Anus horribilis 2022. Personally, I think that they are all horrible but it tells us a lot about the Catholics that they find all anuses inspiring and alluring.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Dennis Lukes]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

Power Rangers actor, Jason David Frank, died a few days ago.

He was known to having been the Green, the White, the Red and the Black Ranger all at the same time. How could he play so many roles in just one season?

Well glory be, I'm glad to hear it. But once again your priestly knowledge of nerd culture aimed at young boys leaves me more than a little disturbed.

[Romeo Rovagnati]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

Power Rangers actor, Jason David Frank, died a few days ago.

He was known to having been the Green, the White, the Red and the Black Ranger all at the same time. How could he play so many roles in just one season?

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

Hell. Will hymns be sung there? I could see perpetual hymn muzak to remind everyone they really made the wrong decision when they rejected God. Some freak on a saxophone pumps up the jazz or a Theremin ensemble increases its voltage. Maybe the metal band goes completely ape – but the hymns just get louder.

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

"Only" 72, Brother Dr. Toole, Sir? Psalm 90:10 - The days of our years are threescore years and ten; and if by reason of strength they be fourscore years, yet is their strength labour and sorrow; for it is soon cut off, and we fly away.

Sorry Sister, I missed the units. 72 stone. An archaic British measure of the body mass index.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

He was only 72.

"Only" 72, Brother Dr. Toole, Sir? Psalm 90:10 - The days of our years are threescore years and ten; and if by reason of strength they be fourscore years, yet is their strength labour and sorrow; for it is soon cut off, and we fly away.

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

Obese fantasy wizard and probable pedarist Robbie Coltrane joins an increasing cast of actors from the Harry Potter movies in Hell today. He's best remembered because he has a similar name to more famous Coltranes and because he was chronically, obscenely, morbidly fat. He was only 72.

[handmaiden]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

Angela Lansbury is spinning over an open fire even as we speak. We're talking about charges of demonic possession of a teapot and murders on a weekly basis.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

Nobody's ever seen a wormhole and Bajorans are not real. Hell on the other hand is and having represented the push for secular values, enshrined in the Trekkie universe (honestly, have you ever met one?) Louise Fletcher will be staying longer than the one week.

∞

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

Why do they have to go to Switzerland? Couldn't they just shoot themselves?

Well it would certainly avoid the language problem. I mean, who speaks Swiss?

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

Why do they have to go to Switzerland?

Sister, I think the sense of deep despair one feels in Europe makes the procedure easier to bear. I can't think of anyone that would want to off themselves in happy, pro life place such as Indiana for example.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

I see that Godless French film director Jean-Luc Godard has made a one-way trip to Switzerland to be voluntarily murdered. He is now à bout de souffle.

Why do they have to go to Switzerland? Couldn't they just shoot themselves? And if they're broke, the risk of prosecution after breaking into a gun shop and stealing one must extremely low.

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

Re: ALL ABOARD - The HELL Train!!

I see that Godless French film director Jean-Luc Godard has made a one-way trip to Switzerland to be voluntarily murdered. He is now à bout de souffle.

Thank God for that. I couldn't stand his fake English accent and the make-believe. No Trekkies, Jedi is not a real religion.