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  • Bjorn Jensen
    True Christian™
    True Christian™
    • Apr 2012
    • 2356
    #1

    Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

    Brothers in Christ, i am very upset right now. The Swedish communist police just knocked on my door, and confiscated my whole ivory collection
    I love ivory, you can make the most beautiful items with the help of ivory, it looks so much better on piano keys than on some stupid elephant, until an hour ago i had a big collection of ivory items, but now they are all gone, the police said that i am now charged for serious illegal wildlife trade and that i might go to prison. The Bible says that we should have dominion over the animals, and it does not make any exception for endangered species.








    They even took my beloved ivory bound KJV
    Tags: None
    • Kooterbreath
      Unsaved trash, pathetic jap wannabee
      • Nov 2012
      • 34
      #2
      Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

      Instead of asking for help, you should be thanking whoever-God-you-follow-I-don't-care for not being shot. The Swedish police follow something like "Shoot first, ask later". They've could confiscated your remains and your Ivory collection.

      And also, WHY THE FUCK HAVEN'T YOU SOLD THEM? THEY COULD BE WORTH $10K EACH ONE!
      Matthew 25:35; 25:38; 25:43.

        Comment

        • Zechariah Smyth
          Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
          True Christian™
          • Feb 2011
          • 15251
          #3
          Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

          Originally posted by Kinky View Post
          Instead of asking for help, you should be thanking whoever-God-you-follow-I-don't-care for not being shot. The Swedish police follow something like "Shoot first, ask later". They've could confiscated your remains and your Ivory collection.

          And also, WHY THE piffle HAVEN'T YOU SOLD THEM? THEY COULD BE WORTH $10K EACH ONE!
          I'm pretty sure the Swish police don't carry firearms. I think they carry harpoons.

          YiC,

          Zech
          sigpic

            Comment

            • Kooterbreath
              Unsaved trash, pathetic jap wannabee
              • Nov 2012
              • 34
              #4
              Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

              Originally posted by Zechariah Smyth View Post
              I'm pretty sure the Swish police don't carry firearms. I think they carry harpoons.

              YiC,

              Zech
              Do you think I can take the word of a member of a "church" which thinks Sweden is Switzerland and Switzerland i Sweden?
              Matthew 25:35; 25:38; 25:43.

                Comment

                • MisterM
                  True Christian™
                  True Christian™
                  • Mar 2011
                  • 1480
                  #5
                  Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

                  Originally posted by Kinky View Post
                  Do you think I can take the word of a member of a "church" which thinks Sweden is Switzerland and Switzerland i Sweden?
                  Haven't you heard of Nicknames?

                  And who cares what Europanistan countries are called anyway.
                  Romans 1:18 - For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who hold the truth in unrighteousness;

                    Comment

                    • Faith_Machine
                      Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
                      True Christian™
                      • Mar 2011
                      • 10050
                      #6
                      Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

                      Ex-Viking, thank you for providing us with this sobering cautionary tale of what can happen when the powers of government are not limited. I'm assuming those Swedish stormtroopers probably sexually assaulted your wife and daughters while they were in your home, but you just didn't mention that because you were so distraught about the ivory collection.

                      I don't know what the shekel-to-ivory conversion rate is, but hopefully maybe you will come out ahead of the game when all is said and done?
                      WARNING:
                      In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                      REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                        Comment

                        • Mary Etheldreda
                          Gushing for Jesus
                           
                          • Sep 2011
                          • 23775
                          #7
                          Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

                          Originally posted by Ex-Viking View Post
                          The Bible says that we should have dominion over the animals, and it does not make any exception for endangered species.
                          Indeed!

                          Why, this irks me so! Not only do you suffer at the hands of "animal rights" fools, you tell us this wealth redistribution is happening even in white countries!

                          O come LORD Jesus!
                          Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

                            Comment

                            • Rahab the Harlot
                              Forum Member, struggling to repent from whoredoms
                              Once a foul twat. Back on Christ's nice list
                              Forum Member
                              • Oct 2012
                              • 25
                              #8
                              Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

                              I'm not as well versed in the Christian Bible as others are, but isn't there a verse somewhere saying that you have to obey the laws of the land, or something like that?
                              Proverbs 9:10 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.

                                Comment

                                • Levi Jones
                                  Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
                                  Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
                                  Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
                                   
                                  • Jul 2009
                                  • 13930
                                  #9
                                  Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

                                  Originally posted by FoulTwat View Post
                                  I'm not as well versed in the Christian Bible as others are, but isn't there a verse somewhere saying that you have to obey the laws of the land, or something like that?
                                  Of course we are to follow the laws of the land, but the ivory was collected before the hunting of elephants was made illegal as far as you can prove.

                                  Possession of ivory is a victimless crime. No one was harmed in obtaining it.
                                  Yeah, we have to follow the laws of the land, but we don't have to like it.
                                  Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

                                    Comment

                                    • Harold Law
                                      Forum Member
                                      Forum Member
                                      • Dec 2007
                                      • 136
                                      #10
                                      Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

                                      Really not much to worry about here, I suggest going to Nigeria or one of those other depraved nations and bagging a real elephant on some hippy-dippy nature preserve. If the park rangers give you any trouble, a bucket of fried chicken and a forty ounce should get them to look the other way.

                                      Best, Harold Law
                                      Ephesians 5:22-24
                                      22*Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23*For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24*Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

                                        Comment

                                        • Bjorn Jensen
                                          True Christian™
                                          True Christian™
                                          • Apr 2012
                                          • 2356
                                          #11
                                          Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

                                          Originally posted by FoulTwat View Post
                                          I'm not as well versed in the Christian Bible as others are, but isn't there a verse somewhere saying that you have to obey the laws of the land, or something like that?
                                          I can assure you that all my ivory is 100% legal, it was all legally harvested before 1989, at least thats what the ivory trader told me so it has to be true

                                            Comment

                                            • Ezekiel Bathfire
                                              Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
                                              Christ's Rottweiler
                                               
                                              • Jan 2008
                                              • 22887
                                              #12
                                              Re: Swedish communist police stole my ivory collection

                                              Dear Lord! This is the worst tale of an illegal seizure since Ebenezer Growcot had a heart attack when in bed with a nigra!

                                              I simply cannot understand it! You can't have your historical ivory figures of immense spiritual value, but apparently the police can!!!

                                              One law for the Police, another for the Christian! Religious hatred and theft rolled into one!

                                              What about protesting to the King Gustav?
                                              sigpic


                                              “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

                                              Author of such illuminating essays as,
                                              Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

                                                Comment

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