X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • Ezekiel Bathfire
    Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
    Christ's Rottweiler
     
    • Jan 2008
    • 22845

    #1

    Australians - Officially Fattest!

    So, let me give you a few words:
    Hypocrites
    Lard-ass
    Jello bags
    Bloated whales
    Wobbling guts

    Yes, I’m describing Australians. If you want a spot of shade on Bondi Beach, seek out a native, and cool off in the ½ acre of shadow she casts. When you want sunshine again, ask her to move along as you want to build a house where she’s standing. If you want to get her moved, use two strong men and a barrow.

    And if ever an Australian mentions “Supersize Me” refer him/her to this article.
    Australia beats US to title of most obese nation, report finds

    The ideal Antipodean, especially in the lead-up to an Olympic Games, may well be trim, taut and trouncing the opposition on the sporting field.
    But in one field Australians are, unexpectedly, leading the way as the heavyweight champions of the world — with arguably a greater proportion of obese citizens than even the notoriously supersized Americans.
    A study released yesterday shows that Australia’s obesity epidemic has been considerably underestimated, with almost 60 per cent of the adult population overweight.
    • Described as the most thorough study of the problem in Australia for a decade, it also shows that 26 per cent of adults, or four million people, are obese. Researchers say that the once mid-ranking nation, in terms of obesity, now weighs in at the top.

    Simon Stewart, who led the research team, said that obesity was the big threat to Australia’s future health, with an estimated nine million people obese or overweight. “That is a million more obese adults than we had thought,” he said.
    The study, which comes before a government inquiry into the epidemic, charted the height and weight of 14,000 adult Australians on a single day in 2005. It shows that the middle-aged are the fattest of all, with about seven in ten men and six in ten women aged 45 to 64 now registering a body mass index (BMI) of 25 or more — a definition of being overweight.
    An over-abundance of food, particularly those high in fat and sugar, and reduced levels of physical activity, are blamed for the expansion in Australian waistlines.
    Can you be True Christian and be that fat? Does God want the wheezing, panting, sweating and wobbling in His Church?
    Landover’s Mission to Australia has its work cut out!

    Any pictures of Fat Australians will be welcome as Austrian Unsaved Trash will not be able to read as fat eyelids obscure most of their close vision.
    Last edited by Ezekiel Bathfire; 08-02-2008, 01:39 PM.
    sigpic


    “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

    Author of such illuminating essays as,
    Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78552

    #2
    Re: Australians - Officially Fattest!

    It must be from their daily diet of Foster's Lager and fried maggots. Pretty high calorie stuff I guess.
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

    Comment

    • Wide-Open
      Director of European Evangelical Outreach
      A Shining Example of Christ's Love
      Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
      True Christian™
      • Nov 2007
      • 18449

      #3
      Re: Australians - Officially Fattest!

      Isn't that bung79?

      That is... shocking brother.

      Proverbs 11:25
      The liberal soul shall be made fat: and he that watereth shall be watered also himself.
      Psalm 81:10:
      I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
      open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.

      Comment

      • Nobar King
        Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
        Christ's Guardian
        True Christian™
        • Sep 2007
        • 23748

        #4
        Re: Australians - Officially Fattest!

        What about them abos? I didn't think they had enough food to get fat (other than eating rabbits and roo). Plus, they run so much.
        May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

        Comment

        • Rev. M. Rodimer
          Honorary True Christian™
          Forum Member
          • May 2008
          • 13996

          #5
          Re: Australians - Officially Fattest!

          Originally posted by Nobar King View Post
          What about them abos? I didn't think they had enough food to get fat (other than eating rabbits and roo). Plus, they run so much.
          Do they even count as Australian citizens, Brother Nobar?

          I thought they were considered wildlife.
          Bible boring? Nonsense!
          Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
          You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

          Comment

          • BibleBeliever
            Forum Member
            Forum Member
            • Jun 2008
            • 85

            #6
            Re: Australians - Officially Fattest!

            Godless gluttons ...

            Comment

            • Glendora Christianson
              Spiritual Mother of LBC
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 2329

              #7
              Re: Australians - Officially Fattest!

              Do all Australians have a cooter canopy? CURIOUS LESS THAN 30% BODY FAT GLENDORA
              Attached Files
              Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.

              Comment

              Working...