[Cueball]

Resenting the connection.

Brother.......or....sister....it appears that you And, since you are not acting erratically at the moment, and since the Department of Faith has not yet pinned the attack against our GODLY forum on you and your cohorts cueball and shane, I have decided to give you a new lease on life.

Ok, I made the mistake of registering (after the reopening) using an MSN account, and I accept my original account getting deleted in a preemptive strike (as it's the only way the United States will ever win the War on Terrorism). But I resent being called a cohort of some hell-bound oreorental I wouldn't touch with a flagpole.

Just like with the old board, I registered here after many months of reading the Landover Baptist website to escape the strain and pressures of having to live near sickular, monkey-worshiping, round earth theory-believing, homersexuals... Only to come into contact with them on this fourm who are even more augmentative about my True Christian™ beliefs than the ones that live in my community!

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Brother, forgive me if I erroneously threw you in the same barrel as those bad apples shane and wazzerhis/her name.

We are fair and funloving folks here and giving second chances, like the American voters gave our GODLY President, is something we do on occasion.

Welcome to JESUS' favorite forum where the GOOD WORD(tm) is heard by all who care to listen.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Back to the topic.

I came across some old playboy magazines someone must have put under my matress, I'll throw those in the bonfire as well.

Filthy homer demons always planting that filth under my matress.

Yes, the same way they must have mysteriously planted all that questionable material that is undoubtedly on your hard drive...you don't want to be tempted to hell, Bro Mike! Best to burn your computer hard drive, just to be safe!

[Cueball]

Thank you Pastor.

Brother, forgive me if I erroneously threw you in the same barrel as those bad apples shane and wazzerhis/her name.

Why thank you for clearing that up Pastor Pistle. I wasn't offended as much as I was worried that other people would make the same mistake... But I'll keep on working here to establish myself here among the True Christians™ as I work to build up my credit score and obtain the several more hundred thousand dollars needed to hopefully get me into Freehold, Iowa.

[BibleBetty]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

I believe that burning knowledge and information of any form isn't right. Plus isn't burning the only way to dispose of beyond repair Bibles? Thats what I was taught. *shrugs*

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

I believe that burning knowledge and information of any form isn't right. Plus isn't burning the only way to dispose of beyond repair Bibles? Thats what I was taught. *shrugs*

You burn the US flag to retire it, not the Bible friend.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

I believe that burning knowledge and information of any form isn't right. Plus isn't burning the only way to dispose of beyond repair Bibles? Thats what I was taught. *shrugs*

You could not possibly be more wrong on this point, Miss B. There is Godly information and there is demonic information. Bibles are never to be burned, Harry Potter and goth music CD's are.

Acts 19:19 Many of them also which used curious arts brought their books together, and burned them before all men: and they counted the price of them, and found it fifty thousand pieces of silver. 19:20 So mightily grew the word of God and prevailed.

Whoever your teacher was on these points, I'd go and rebuke them if I were you.

[Jesus is Lord]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

I believe that burning knowledge and information of any form isn't right. Plus isn't burning the only way to dispose of beyond repair Bibles? Thats what I was taught. *shrugs*

That is blasphemy! One should never attempt to burn the Bible! I say attempt as my understanding is that Bibles don't burn.

[Glendora Christianson]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

I believe that burning knowledge and information of any form isn't right. Plus isn't burning the only way to dispose of beyond repair Bibles? Thats what I was taught. *shrugs*

What's the proper way to dispose of unusable Bibles?

Oh, how I wish this were a problem. We have too many Bibles in wonderful mint condition in this world!

But I know Pastor Pistle and some of the others have been known to hollow out a worn out Bible and stash a handgun in it. I'm sure our Lord Jesus Christ would approve of this clever recycling tip.

[Talitha]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

Mr Malachi reminded me that this month we celebrate our Annual Book Burning.

Make sure you have your tickets booked now!!

You are invited to join us along with thousands of churches
across America as we act simultaneously at
12:00 Midnight CST, October 31, 2006. God is on our side!

[Marshall]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

I will do my level best to be at this event unless the Landover Hellhouse detains me for the evening.
I have heard the detracters claiming book cleansing is akin to censorship and they mention Farenheit 451, Animal Farm and all sorts of similar blasphemous things as their reasoning. Well answer this you secular geniuses, how can you use a book that deserves burning as a reason not to burn books? It's like listening to a Muslim explain why he's not evil! Can you say obvious bias? I knew you could smart guy.

Clearly just throwing the books away isn't solving the problem now is it? Only by burning and (thereby eliminating the offensive material forever) will the Lords Justice be done. It makes perfect sense to anyone with any sense to begin with and those that disagree are plainly under Lucifers spell.

Acts chapter 19 states that burning that which offends God is looked upon by God as favorable.
Now I don't know about the Unsaved Trash that float around this site, but as for me...I'm 100% in favor of staying on Jesus good side.

[Student of Landover]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

Although I can't be in Freehold for the big book burning, I shall borrow as many ungodly books from my local library as possible and watch them perish in the flames. I've already burnt all the ungodly books (Basically all of the books I had) that I used to have before I came to this site. Now all I have is my copy of the KJV 1611, the only book neccesary.

[Talitha]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

STOP PRESS!!!!!

A new book has been added to our burning list.

The God Delusion by that Secularist Homer Richard Dork-ins.

It's a heretical book by a man who seems to talk out of his Bottom.
If I were a Mooslime I'd declare a Fatwa against this man and his lies immediately.

[Student of Landover]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

How good of you, Sister, to think of all the people out there being corrupted by this filth. It is surely God's work that you are doing by alerting the public to these books which are an affront to the Lord. Surely Jesus vomits with rage everytime these authors put pen to paper!
I can only be thankful that people like you are saving the rest of us by consigning this blasphemy to the flames!

[Talitha]

Re: Invitation to a Book Burning

Matthew 12:31
3 Wherefore I say unto you, All manner of sin and blasphemy shall be forgiven unto men: but the blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men.

Praise Jesus™