Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

It's a good idea to regularily remind yourself of good things, things you are grateful for.

Today I cut myself while shaving and boy, did I bleed like a stuck pig. When I was a kid I nearly puked whenever someone got a nose bleed. Now it's nothing. Maybe it's thanks to desensitizing media violence, or maybe I'm just more mature.

Also, I came very close to drinking a spider. Jesus made me look in the glass so at the last moment I spotted the little guy and tossed him/her out the window. You have to understand, I'm a strick vertibratarian.

What little things are you grateful for today?

[Nobar King]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

I found the hole in the roof where the rain comes in today. The roofers failed to address one square inch of roof under the gutter, and hence, the rain comes in. As soon as it dries out I'm going to patch it and I hope that I'll be able to sleep better when it rains.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

I'm grateful for the fact that my fiance didn't overcook my steak today. I had to give her the back of my hand yesterday, because she ruined a perfectly good porterhouse.

I ordered it rare and she brought to me medium rare! Now I ask you!?

[JennyD]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

Dom DeLuise died.

Finally!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

I'm grateful for the fact that my fiance didn't overcook my steak today. I had to give her the back of my hand yesterday, because she ruined a perfectly good porterhouse.

I ordered it rare and she brought to me medium rare! Now I ask you!?

JESUS CHRIST! I promised I'll never do it again. Why do you have to tell everyone? Gosh!

[JennyD]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

I'm glad that I still have a job, and a man, and a sweet doggie who eats burglars.

I'm not so excited that she regularly releases clouds of noxious gases, attempting to kill me by ass-phyxiation.

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

I just got a new 28-inch monitor. It has to be seen to be believed. The Love of Jesus is literally filling my entire field of view right now.

I can even see every wrinkle on the smiley's faces.

<--- Muslim lady has a little birthmark under her left nostril.

<--- Devil even has hair stuck between his teeth.

Okay, I'm exagerating, but seriously, if there's anything you want, say a few prayers and check Ebay for it, because you never know when a deal like this one will show up. I'm going to send a special tithe to Jesus for His rigging Ebay in my favor, just like he did with Florida for Bush in 2000.

[Bob4God]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

I am grateful that GOD has spared my True Christian business during this economic crisis. Floods of people come in everyday looking for ammunition and I can barely keep it on the shelves before they snatch it up!

PRAISE THE LORD!

[eliot mayfield]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

I'm grateful I found God and am no longer a sinner.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

A good pair of woolen socks. A man may withstand many of the vicissitudes of life strengthened by woolen socks.

[confedchick]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

Oh there is so much for which to be grateful!
My friend who recently got into a motorcycle accident is alive and well,
I have my health,
I have a man who loves me

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

I'm glad that I still have a job, and a man, and a sweet doggie who eats burglars.

I'm not so excited that she regularly releases clouds of noxious gases, attempting to kill me by ass-phyxiation.

You have a man, Sister Jenny?

I guess my hope that you would wait for me was too much to ask. Who is the lucky man you're courting? Is it that gruff Brother Nobar? Or are you out and about with the very randy (I hear) Old Man Hatchett? Don Bozo, perhaps?

[Nobar King]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

You sure ask a lot of questions, brother Rod. Maybe you should pay attention more, instead of poking your nose into your bar-glass.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

You sure ask a lot of questions, brother Rod. Maybe you should pay attention more, instead of poking your nose into your bar-glass.

See how gruff he is, Sister Jenny?

You deserve better than that, a delicate flower like you!

[Nobar King]

Re: Attitude of Gratitude: what are you thankful for today?

PBFFTHHLTHHF!! FPBFLLFFF!!

Buy me another round. Nown.