Best way to make kids shut up?

[lukasekman]

As a caring Christian parent, I know by own experience that spanking on the buttocks usually works fine as corporal punishment. It's rarely necessary to hot-sauce a kid who is capable to absorb the wisdom from the Bible at the age of seven.

But dealing with disorderly loud attention-seeking kids from atheist families is completely different. The classrooms in socialist Sweden is more like a hen farm than a calm place to absorb knowledge. Teachers are burnt out because of the stress and noise, and those kids who actually wants to learn something are constantly distracted from bastard kids.

In next week, I will work as a substitute teacher for a class, who burnt out their teacher. I suspect that spanking will only have partial effect on the worst bastard kids, and want an option that temporary disable them to talk, even if they are as rebellious as their idol Che Guevara. I have considered stomach punching, hot-saucing and washing out their mouths with soap. But the ideal would be something like laryngitis, a complication of common cold that make it difficult and demanding to talk, and impossible to make loud noises. Is their any liquid or physical punishment that cause a similar effect?

Prov 12:1
Whoso loveth instruction loveth knowledge: but he that hateth reproof is brutish

Prov 13:3
He that keepeth his mouth keepeth his life: but he that openeth wide his lips shall have destruction.

[MisterM]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

I would enter the classroom yelling student to shut up, stand in attention and to greet you with respect. If possible, repeat this 3-4 times and 3rd time say that if next time does not go well, everybody will stay after school.

You can also smash pointer by hitting it hard to the school desk.

Don't give those little devils any time to recover. So if someone starts to protest, throw him out of the class immediately and give 2 hour detention. If 2-5 students starts to weep, I would call it success.

I have been using this method while teaching computer science to adults.

YiC,
Miikkael

[María Gálvez-Villalobos]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

I think you methods ios all wrong here.

Aren't you know what childrens resspond very well to estories? Read them books and famous kids's estories and you will see how they go be quiet and enjoy whit the estory!

I know! I have nefews and little couisins and this always wrok when I read estories them. They love listen me read estories. Try it! But remember be inetersting and animated and emotional and entusiast and motivator and HAPPY!



this work good! I can ensure of you!

Hope this advises help you!

YIC. Mari.

[MisterM]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

With all respect, but how many times have you Maria taught those devil's spawns? Do you think they respect you if you try to be Mister Nice Guy (senorita buana chica)? Not in my experience.

[María Gálvez-Villalobos]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

With all respect, but how many times have you Maria taught those devil's spawns? Do you think they respect you if you try to be Mister Nice Guy (senorita buana chica)? Not in my experience.

Hey! I was only saying you a easy way for keep kids entertein. I have work in summers like 'monitora de tiempo libre' - 'free time monitor'(??) in summer camps at the beach whit activities and water esports and I was especially whit the little kiddies from ages 6 to 12 more or less, and sometimes when we had sleep in cabañas whit the little ones they loved the estories I telled them.

Is easy if you try. Can be fun too. Maybe try this? Kids always like me and I no have no problems never whit them AAAANNND the only monitors what have probelms was the ones what try be Mr Hard Man Terminator whit them - they no take you serious if you are this.

Better to try mutual respecting. Always work for me.

Hope this help - is only my advises from my experience.



YIC, Mari.

[MisterM]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

Maria, that might work there near the civilization but we are talking about Swiss kids here. They are almost as bad as Finns. No RESPECT at all.

[lukasekman]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

Maria, that might work there near the civilization but we are talking about Swiss kids here. They are almost as bad as Finns. No RESPECT at all.

Swedish kids are actually worse than Finnish kids. Finland have more orderliness in the classroom than Sweden have.

[María Gálvez-Villalobos]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

Swedish kids are actually worse than Finnish kids. Finland have more orderliness in the classroom than Sweden have.

Well, spanish kids is all very excitable (a bit like me - tee hee hee*) and talk a lot a lot a lot and chat all the time and can be a bit loud but I never have no problems getting the attention!

Maybe I should to go there! Or I can give to you some advises or show you my tips!

YIC, Mari.

[Nobar King]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

Maybe a bull horn would help? Some of them have those attention getting sirens on them, too.

[Palmer C. Eldrich]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

With kids you really need to employ reverse psychology. Let them know from the first minute that you're not like their normal teacher: You're not going to require that they do their homework, you'll let them take bathroom breaks, etc. Next you start with some hippy dippy mumbo jumbo. Kids eat that stuff up. Start out with a visualization session. Turn all the lights out and tell the kids to think about something they like, like minecraft or Lady Gaga. After about ten minutes it's time to take a field trip to the lawn outside where the kids can go over their books. They won't do it, but the noise is much more tolerable outside without all of the echoes from the walls inside your classroom.



Another option is to just send the noisy ones on an errand. Split up the chatterboxes. Send them to the library or the main office for something unimportant.

If none of that works, you might try dry peanut butter and bread sandwiches. That should keep their mouths busy.

[Pure_Angel]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

One and biggest tip: do not smile! Or look friendly.

Look like a authority person and raise your voice. Most children in Sweden have never had an adult telling them what to do, so if you tell them what to do and threaten to hit them they will probably do as you tell them.

I can ofcourse not promise that this will work but last summer when our church held a "Bible Summer Camp", I was one of the leaders, there came really naughty children who were not baptists. (aparently that was since it was "free" cheap swedes sent there children to us) I was disgusted by them. One of them called me a bad word, so I got another campleader to beat him infront of the other children. They never said anything bad again!
And after the camp they was perfect little God-fearing angels that could recite the Bible if you woke them up in the middle of the night and plough a field all by themselves!
Of course we spent 2 weeks in the woods and a cold lake but I am sure that if you just look like an authority and act strict they will listen. Also, start out by showing what will happen if they do something bad!

I hope everything will work out, and I will pray that it will!

Yours in Christ
Elisabeth

[lukasekman]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

Thanks Elisabeth, I'll take your advice and do the best of the situation.

Sincerely in Christ, Lukas

[WinnerNotSinner]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

I think some corporal punishment is called for friend. Children don't respect people who don't beat them; that's a fact. You need to make sure the children have no option but to shut up and accept your rules. They might be terrified, but they'll be darned quiet.

Some tips I would give to any teacher:

• Keep the boys and the girls separate; you will find that the girls will talk more about absolute unimportant rubbish, they are just small women remember. This nonsense talk may distract the eager to learn boys.
  
• Keep the black children separate; you will find that black children make a lot of noise laughing or talking loudly between themselves, and this may frighten the white children. An idea may be to put the unintelligent black children at the back of the class or simply send them outside to play on the monkey bars. In the good old days teachers kept them in cages every lesson, but unfortunately this isn't allowed anymore.
  
• Don't take no for an answer; if a child doesn't respect you, hit him/her, and everyone around that person. If children see others are getting punished for their crimes, they will feel worse about what they have done. That's some psychology for you, friend, good luck with your teaching.

[María Gálvez-Villalobos]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

I think some corporal punishment is called for friend. Children don't respect people who don't beat them; that's a fact. You need to make sure the children have no option but to shut up and accept your rules. They might be terrified, but they'll be darned quiet.

Some tips I would give to any teacher:

• Keep the boys and the girls separate; you will find that the girls will talk more about absolute unimportant rubbish, they are just small women remember. This nonsense talk may distract the eager to learn boys.
• Keep the black children separate; you will find that black children make a lot of noise laughing or talking loudly between themselves, and this may frighten the white children. An idea may be to put the unintelligent black children at the back of the class or simply send them outside to play on the monkey bars. In the good old days teachers kept them in cages every lesson, but unfortunately this isn't allowed anymore.
• Don't take no for an answer; if a child doesn't respect you, hit him/her, and everyone around that person. If children see others are getting punished for their crimes, they will feel worse about what they have done. That's some psychology for you, friend, good luck with your teaching.

Ejem ejem*

I'm think you no have be listen to NOTHING I say. What if kid is bigger and estronger than you? Huh?

Or if law become involved? Eh?

I think you all should to listen ME as someone what have EXPERIENCE whit kids so you don't do mistakes others people does!

Mt Winner - have you EVER teached kids? I mean whit success?

Please, I'm know what I'm talking about. Trust me. I am 'La Mari Juana' - whit the kids.
(though sometimes my nickedname was 'TombRaider' - no sure why - perhps cos of clothes I use for work and esports acctivitys..?)

YIC, Mari.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Best way to make kids shut up?

In my experience hitting them on their head with a Bible works best. It's important to remember that it's only a proper punishment if they bleed. If they complain about the punishment, explain you do it out of love and hit them again, but harder. After a few times they will understand you do it out of love and they will stop complaining about it.