I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

[handmaiden]

Dear Brothers in Christ, I do so need your prayer and guidance.


Last night, I had a very detailed and vivid dream in which I was standing before a man. He -- uh-- this is very difficult to admit, but I know a full confession is necessary if I am to be cleansed-- he was, you know, large in certain aspects.

In the dream, I bent down my head and ah-- did things to him involving my mouth-- which he liked very much. The level of reality in the dream was astounding. I am worried that I brought this on myself because I enjoyed an ice cream bar known as a "Magnum" last night. I ate the ice cream with a great deal of enthusiasm and did not leave so much as a speck left on the stick and now I fear that the pleasure that I experienced in my mouth and on my tongue is what led to my sinful dream.

Worse, I actually ate two of the ice cream bars last night. One was vanilla covered in white chocolate and the other was vanilla covered in milk chocolate with bits of almond in it. In the dream, it was definitely white chocolate "flavor". But for a split second, I think that there were two of them.


Please, help me with this problem. The images were unbelievably substantive and so I am very distressed.


Prayerfully Yours,

Handmaiden

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

Dear Brothers in Christ, I do so need your prayer and guidance.


Last night, I had a very detailed and vivid dream in which I was standing before a man. He -- uh-- this is very difficult to admit, but I know a full confession is necessary if I am to be cleansed-- he was, you know, large in certain aspects.

In the dream, I bent down my head and ah-- did things to him which he liked very much. The level of reality in the dream was astounding. I am worried that I brought this on myself because I enjoyed an ice cream bar known as a "Magnum" last night. I ate the ice cream with a great deal of enthusiasm and now I fear that the pleasure that I experienced in my mouth and on my tongue is what led to my sinful dream.

Worse, I actually ate two of the ice cream bars last night. One was vanilla covered in white chocolate and the other was vanilla cover in milk chocolate with bits of almond in it. In the dream, it was definitely white "chocolate".


Please, help me with this problem. The images were unbelievably substantive and so I am very distressed.


Prayerfully Yours,

Handmaiden

I don't get it. You dreamed about a fat guy?

[TheLordSavedMe]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

Dear Brothers in Christ, I do so need your prayer and guidance.


Last night, I had a very detailed and vivid dream in which I was standing before a man. He -- uh-- this is very difficult to admit, but I know a full confession is necessary if I am to be cleansed-- he was, you know, large in certain aspects.

In the dream, I bent down my head and ah-- did things to him involving my mouth-- which he liked very much. The level of reality in the dream was astounding. I am worried that I brought this on myself because I enjoyed an ice cream bar known as a "Magnum" last night. I ate the ice cream with a great deal of enthusiasm and did not leave so much as a speck left on the stick and now I fear that the pleasure that I experienced in my mouth and on my tongue is what led to my sinful dream.

Worse, I actually ate two of the ice cream bars last night. One was vanilla covered in white chocolate and the other was vanilla covered in milk chocolate with bits of almond in it. In the dream, it was definitely white chocolate "flavor". But for a split second, I think that there were two of them.


Please, help me with this problem. The images were unbelievably substantive and so I am very distressed.


Prayerfully Yours,

Handmaiden

Was your dream about this guy?

















Tammi

[handmaiden]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

I don't get it. You dreamed about a fat guy?

No, it was only his, ahem, "ice cream bar" which was large.



Embarassedly Yours,

Handmaiden

[handmaiden]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

Was your dream about this guy?

















Tammi

No, it was not. And while his face was sort of vague (in the usual manner of dreams) His body was not. He was not wearing a costume, he was Garden-of-Eden-Just-Prior-to-the-Fall clothed.


Uncomfortably Yours,

Handmaiden

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

No, it was not. And while his face was sort of vague (in the usual manner of dreams) His body was not. He was not wearing a costume, he was Garden-of-Eden-Just-Prior-to-the-Fall clothed.


Uncomfortably Yours,

Handmaiden

OK, so let me see if I understand.

You had a dream in which a man was dressed as Eve, and he had a large apple which you bobbed for.

Now, you are afraid that it means you are seeking to exalt yourself to be equal to God by understanding good from evil.

Is that correct?

My dear sister, there is nothing for you to worry about! You already know good from evil; you are a True Christian(tm), and have read God's Word. You already know Godly Morality!

I bet you were reading your Bible before bed, and were gorging yourself on His Holiness in your dream. That's all.

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

I have to admit that I'd never heard of this "Magnum" before so I had to look it up and, to say the least – they are somewhat disturbing.

I think it's safe to say that at least a man was in your dreams and that you did not have any lezbean fantasies. I hope you did not allow anything to spill – these ice cream bars appear to be rather large and you might have to consume them quickly before they melt.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

This is why we don't let women into GAPE.

Imagine how depraved they would be then! It's time to turn yourself over to your husband for a beating again, dear. Explain to him in detail what you saw as he administers the stripes. You will thereby be anointed.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

He was not wearing a costume, he was Garden-of-Eden-Just-Prior-to-the-Fall

That would be a world with no woman: he had not been corrupted yet. We all have similar dreams. God speaks through dreams as we know:

MATTHEW 27:17-19 Therefore when they were gathered together, Pilate said vnto them, Whom will ye that I release vnto you? Barabbas, or Iesus, which is called Christ? For hee knew that for enuie they had deliuered him. When he was set downe on the Iudgement seate, his wife sent vnto him, saying, Haue thou nothing to doe with that iust man: for I haue suffered many things this day in a dreame, because of him.
©1611

I think you should contact the Pastor of your choice for further information, was your dream just a dream? They will know. You rely on them.

[handmaiden]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

OK, so let me see if I understand.

You had a dream in which a man was dressed as Eve, and he had a large apple which you bobbed for.

Now, you are afraid that it means you are seeking to exalt yourself to be equal to God by understanding good from evil.

Is that correct?

My dear sister, there is nothing for you to worry about! You already know good from evil; you are a True Christian™, and have read God's Word. You already know Godly Morality!

I bet you were reading your Bible before bed, and were gorging yourself on His Holiness in your dream. That's all.

Far be it for me to correct a man, but as regular readers of the Bible know, it was not an apple which was consumed in the Garden of Eden. Nor was there anything apple like about the "object of peril" in my dream.

This is why we don't let women into GAPE.

Imagine how depraved they would be then! It's time to turn yourself over to your husband for a beating again, dear. Explain to him in detail what you saw as he administers the stripes. You will thereby be anointed.

Alas, I have no husband. And I may not even be worthy of a beating, either.

That would be a world with no woman: he had not been corrupted yet. We all have similar dreams. God speaks through dreams as we know:

MATTHEW 27:17-19 Therefore when they were gathered together, Pilate said vnto them, Whom will ye that I release vnto you? Barabbas, or Iesus, which is called Christ? For hee knew that for enuie they had deliuered him. When he was set downe on the Iudgement seate, his wife sent vnto him, saying, Haue thou nothing to doe with that iust man: for I haue suffered many things this day in a dreame, because of him.
©1611

I think you should contact the Pastor of your choice for further information, was your dream just a dream? They will know. You rely on them.

Thank you, Sister, for your wise words. I am not certain which Pastor I would wish to burden with this problem. At least I have finished off all the ice cream bars in my freezer. Perhaps now my sleep will be devoid of daunting dreams.


Resignedly Yours,

Handmaiden

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

Far be it for me to correct a man, but as regular readers of the Bible know, it was not an apple which was consumed in the Garden of Eden. Nor was there anything apple like about the "object of peril" in my dream.

Of course not, it was a "fruit". But had I said that you bobbed for "a fruit", the unsaved might have gotten the wrong idea.

And, ew.

But if it was not a fruit the man held, and instead an ice cream bar, then . . . Hmm. I still think it is about gorging yourself on the Holiness of the Lord. What else could it be?

I have similar dreams all the time, and that's exactly what they're about.

[Cbeck29]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

It's obviously a sex dream. It's just a dream and if you think it's from eating ice cream, then that's a little funny. If it doesn't lead to sin then it's fine. Haha

[Noah Sole]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

It's obviously a sex dream. Haha

Is that all you cathlicks think about - sex?

No wonder every little boy near a priest should be told to keep his back to the wall..

By the way did you see the one the other week about the priest who 'mistakenly' projected some porn images to his congregation?

Priest shows porn to congregation

[Cbeck29]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

Give me a break. The title of this thread mentions a "VERY naughty dream"
If you don't get the original poster's innuendo, you're just not thinking it through. Let's keep this thread off my religion and on the topic of the OP's dream.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: I Had a VERY Naughty Dream Last Night

Give me a break. The title of this thread mentions a "VERY naughty dream"
If you don't get the original poster's innuendo, you're just not thinking it through. Let's keep this thread off my religion and on the topic of the OP's dream.

Several things are going on here, brethren. Here we see both the atheist's obsession with sexual matters and the rejection of faith in favour of sexual gratification.

We also see it making up its own values on the spot that allow it to behave how it pleases but judge other people for following the bidding of our Lord.

Ephesians 2:3 Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others.

Romans 5:10 For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by his life.