Here goes, lets see what happens

[Little Donkey]

OK it's about time I got myself a wife. I don't really want you hanging around the house (my moms getting elderly and won't put up with nonsense), so what I mostly want is some woman to be the vehicle for my seed - and likes spending time outside the house.

I'm white, a man - obviously. Not interested in kids but you should be. That's it I guess. I'm not getting any younger so post asap.

[godswraith1]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

pornographic link removed by mods

[James Hutchins]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

I think I have a few daughters of marrying age. I'll speak to my wife tonight after dinner and before she goes off to do her evening chores.
Do you have a farm or other sort of place that will allow a female to be close to God at all times? Are there any ethnic people about? Will you be supplying room and board?

[Little Donkey]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

I think I have a few daughters of marrying age. I'll speak to my wife tonight after dinner and before she goes off to do her evening chores.
Do you have a farm or other sort of place that will allow a female to be close to God at all times? Are there any ethnic people about? Will you be supplying room and board?

My mom's place is kind of small. This is So Cal after all but in a "safe" area, if you know what I mean. No ethnic restaurants for miles! I can't leave state for a couple more years so I'll be sharing a room with Momma until then, or when she passes.

We've a dirt yard out back that gets hot so we'd have to put up a tent for shade and some stuffed toys. It could be fun for a young teenage girl, like camping. For two years. And of course, no cost to you Sir. Anything you might have spare would be appreciated tho! Sir!

[James Hutchins]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

PM me proof of the requisite fifty shekels. I'll do a line up and see who seems 'like a fit'.
Truth be told, I have no idea how many daughters are at home still. They all stay in the kitchen and cackle like hens. When I bellow for a meal or a cool beverage, one brings it. I never look at them. I do not want to play 'favorites'.
Being you have few qualifications, I am sure one of them will be fine. I will guarantee what ever female you get is fertile and capable of bearing some sort of child for you.

[Go_Away_Sinners!]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

My Pappy's been grumblin' about me and my little sister taking up space in our basement (he just bought some collection of civil war rifles on that ebay thing and needs a place to store them). Either one of us could make a suitable wife for you...I'm fifteen and she's eleven. Pappy wants six hundred dollars for either of us, though. Doileen (that's my sister) can make a mean pie already, and I can play the organ.

[Deaner]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

OK it's about time I got myself a wife.

Son; with all due respect, you don't need a wife, you need a cage with a good lock.

You don't live in Freehold do you?

[Little Donkey]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

No Sir, I don't. And I'm starting to have 2nd thoughts about the wife idea. Fifty shekels, hundreds of dollars, a cage, a good lock? I never knew it would be so difficult and, well, so expensive. Maybe I should read the Bible a few more times and try to save up for the bus fare to Iowa.

[emilymbounds]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

oh goodness, This website is a riot, had me spend hours looking at things before i realized what's going on here, i applaud you.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

oh goodness, This website is a riot, had me spend hours looking at things before i realized what's going on here, i applaud you.

I know! Once the penny drops that every True Christian here is inspired directly by the same Bible the fluffy bunny Christians claim to follow it's almost hilarious if it weren't so tragic. Each one of them so convinced they are going to Heaven and they're going to Hell instead while we sing along with Jesus in Heaven. And they have the nerve to be righteous.

They might as well believe in fairies for all the good it will do them. Why not join with us in not fearing Hell one little bit? You know that the only way to truly follow God is by taking the Bible word for word and shamelessly shout GLORY!

[LBC loving Dutchmen]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

.... and shamelessly shout GLORY!

GLORY!

[ruslan]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

Hello from Kazakhstan

[Hannah Davis]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

Hello from Kazakhstan

Please pop over to the introductions section so that we can give you a proper welcome! Thank you!
Yours In Christ,
Hannah

[counter345]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

I may be a male, but I'm more than willing to be on the receiving end of a strong relationship.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Here goes, lets see what happens

I may be a male, but I'm more than willing to be on the receiving end of a strong relationship.

You already are. His name is Satan, and he has you in thrall to his infernal majesty.

Enjoy Hell.