Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

[ellanoise]

Landover Baptist Church,

Please pray for Landover Baptist Church.

It, in itself, is a cult. A most hateful, degrading, racist, elitist establishment of hypocrisy quite behind it's time.

Purity thongs?
lol
Let us hope that one day, the members of this church can realize that we don't burn people because we think they are witches anymore, and it is okay to think for yourselves.

amen.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

Landover Baptist Church,

Please pray for Landover Baptist Church.

It, in itself, is a cult. A most hateful, degrading, racist, elitist establishment of hypocrisy quite behind it's time.

Purity thongs?
lol
Let us hope that one day, the members of this church can realize that we don't burn people because we think they are witches anymore, and it is okay to think for yourselves.

amen.

Well thanks for coming into our Godly forum to spew that hatespeech. That was very sweet.

Did you know that we are actually blessed by your persecution?

Matthew 5:10 Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
5:11 Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.
5:12 Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

Landover Baptist Church,Please pray for Landover Baptist Church.

Elennose, to whom should we pray? We already pray to God and He smiles kindly upon us - we are His Favorite Church in His Favorite Country. If we were to pray to anyone else, we would risk His Awesome Wrath (usually a general slaughter - men, women, children - plagues, death of firstborn, drought, famine, pestilence, etc.) and Eternal Damnation.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

Let us hope that one day, the members of this church can realize that we don't burn people because we think they are witches anymore, and it is okay to think for yourselves.

amen.

The people of Landover DO think for themselves. They think it's better to follow God's Law than spend eternity in Hell.

Nobody here advocates burning people at the stake because we think they are witches. There are plenty of self-confessed witches to destroy, usually by the preferred method of stoning.

Really, is it that much to ask that you do a LITTLE homework on Landover before ranting against these Godly people?

[Forest_dweller (Quarantined)]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

Did you know that we are actually blessed by your persecution?

Really? Have some more blessings then, cultist.
This church is a disgrace to all of christianity (to the point where I dare to agree with objectiveministries about it). You spew and vomit sexism and hate. You teach of a God who sounds more like a nightmare. You are so surrounded by your own hypocrisy that you simply ignore anything involving reason.
You are a bunch of science hating bigots, and you hate science because you know, secretly, that it will destroy religion one day (just like darkness cannot exist when a candle is lit) and this terrifies you. This bursts your little bubble of self-delusion and security, leaving you exposed to new ideas, and this scares you beyond belief.
You hate everyone besides yourselves, and you never even stop to think "Is this REALLY what jesus did?" because you are too busy Sh*ting yourselves in fear that religion will one day be destroyed, and disproven beyond a shadow of a doubt.

This is why faith cannot exist with evidence. Faith requires you to blindfold yourself, and walk blindly where you are told. Evidence is much more powerful, and it rips that hideous blindfold off and slaps you into reality!

There. More blessings for you. You know how generous I am with those.

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

Really? Have some more blessings then, cultist.

Thank you for your donation. Would you PM your receipt number from your donation to a Pastor so that we can get the IRS off of our backs please?

This church is a disgrace to all of christianity (to the point where I dare to agree with objectiveministries about it).

In a sort of twisted way, I would almost agree with you, that we DO make a disgrace out of all other "christian" churches; but only because we follow the Word of God to the "t". And I don't know of this "object ministries" you speak of, but it sounds sexual

You teach of a God who sounds more like a nightmare.

Indeed we do the nightmare of sinners like you. The Lord's Judgment will be WORSE than your worst nightmare, I can assure you!

You are a bunch of science hating bigots, and you hate science because you know, secretly, that it will destroy religion one day (just like darkness cannot exist when a candle is lit) and this terrifies you.

I'm sure religion will do quite well. Science comes and goes (remember the "Global Cooling" hoax, anyone?), but True Christianity has stood the test of the past 4,000 years and isn't going anywhere soon ! And it's funny that you use the "light vs. darkness" metaphor because the Bible uses a similar one:

16Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

Let me clue you in on something: we True Christians(tm) are the light of this world--you are the worthless darkness that we are on a mission to extinguish!

This is why faith cannot exist with evidence. Faith requires you to blindfold yourself, and walk blindly where you are told. Evidence is much more powerful, and it rips that hideous blindfold off and slaps you into reality!

Jesus and I completely disagree with you: FAITH is much more powerful. Tell me, can YOU move mountains? I can, because of FAITH. Now you tell me which is more powerful: your "evidence" or my faith?

20And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you.

Praise Jesus, another sinner shown the Light of the Word

[sinnersbedamned]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

Please pray for Landover Baptist Church.

It, in itself, is a cult. A most hateful, degrading, racist, elitist establishment of hypocrisy quite behind it's time.

You evil son of a bitch cock smoking whore, do not hate on those of us who loveth the lord.

[Bob4God]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

This church is a disgrace to all of christianity (to the point where I dare to agree with objectiveministries about it). You spew and vomit sexism and hate. You teach of a God who sounds more like a nightmare.

We teach only of the One True Three-Headed GOD that the Bible tells us of. If you have a problem, it's with Him and His manifestations, not us.

[Ahimaaz Smith]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

Let us hope that one day, the members of this church can realize that we don't burn people because we think they are witches anymore

We realize that. Why waste perfectly good firewood when there are stones just lying around waiting to be thrown at a sinner?

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

ANGRY RANTING SNIPPED

Why all this hatred Smokey? Where does this rage of yours come from? Were you excommunicated from a True Christian™ Independent Baptist Church and now you take out your frustrations on us?

He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.
Mark 16:16

Well, you can still be Saved boy. Just renounce your secular ways and accept Jesus! We will welcome you with open arms just as soon as you see the error of your proud, sinful ways!

[Forest_dweller (Quarantined)]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

To the captain: No, just no.

To earnest:
Objectiveministries is some site which wants to censor everything non-christian on the internet, because they believe that since the internet was created in America, which is a christian nation (oh, the cheek!) they have full authority to censor anything un christian. And they are against landover too.

"That we are on a mission to extinguish"
Is that some kind of half assed death threat?

Can YOU move mountains? Just be completly honest here. Can you? Have you? Can you prove this? I'll tell you what. If faith REALLY is that powerful, if god REALLY is super-cool and powerful too, then one of you, any one of you, shift mount everest into the ocean. I'll find out about it in the news. Well come on now! Shouldnt this be a piece of cake for you? Pfft, that mountain is in the ocean now right? *Checks news* Nope, seems like that darn stubborn thing wont budge! I wonder whats the matter...
Whats wrong? Is your faith broken? Is god sleeping? Call down fire and brimstone! Do not keep me waiting, you prophets you!

Oh? Still nothing? Well thats now way to keep an audiance. At least some spoon bending would do...

But nothing at all? Well I think I just solved it once and for all. Yes, the timeless question, "Can you REALLY move a mountain with faith?" Has been answered by me. As it turns out, no, no you cannot. Shame.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

Really? Have some more blessings then, cultist.
This church is a disgrace to all of christianity (to the point where I dare to agree with objectiveministries about it). You spew and vomit sexism and hate. You teach of a God who sounds more like a nightmare. You are so surrounded by your own hypocrisy that you simply ignore anything involving reason.
You are a bunch of science hating bigots, and you hate science because you know, secretly, that it will destroy religion one day (just like darkness cannot exist when a candle is lit) and this terrifies you. This bursts your little bubble of self-delusion and security, leaving you exposed to new ideas, and this scares you beyond belief.
You hate everyone besides yourselves, and you never even stop to think "Is this REALLY what jesus did?" because you are too busy Sh*ting yourselves in fear that religion will one day be destroyed, and disproven beyond a shadow of a doubt.

This is why faith cannot exist with evidence. Faith requires you to blindfold yourself, and walk blindly where you are told. Evidence is much more powerful, and it rips that hideous blindfold off and slaps you into reality!

There. More blessings for you. You know how generous I am with those.

That is the most hateful post I have ever read on here. You'll have plenty of time to reflect on this hate-filled rant when you are rotting in HELL!

We will be looking down at you from HEAVEN while floating on white fluffy clouds, laughing hysterically at your pain as SATAN rams his giant uncircumzised tally whacker up your back side.

[Forest_dweller (Quarantined)]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

That is the most hateful post I have ever read on here. You'll have plenty of time to reflect on this hate-filled rant when you are rotting in HELL!

We will be looking down at you from HEAVEN while floating on white fluffy clouds, laughing hysterically at your pain as SATAN rams his giant uncircumzised tally whacker up your back side.

Woah! Slow down with the fantasies there, m'kay? I'm sure you would love to be rammed up your backside by Satan's *ahem* tallywhacker, but some of us do not like the automatic images that are formed when reading that! Yuck, I think I burned my eyes there for a second...

Again with the childish threats. Well I put it to you, that I am not afraid of God or hell, and you can just live with it.

Besides, God does not like it when you laugh at other people's pain. I would have thought a bible thumping blonde like yourself would know that (or did it just go from one ear out the other with your blonde little head there?)
Maybe Satan will burn some of these verses that I'm talking about now on you if you ask nicely.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

You have been given a handful of shiny new infractions for that hateful post.

I DEMAND an apology or I will toss you in Quarantine Hell.

[Forest_dweller (Quarantined)]

Re: Please pray for Landover Baptist Church

Your the one with the fantasies there. I apologize for nothing.
Giving crap to other people is all fine and good until it gets flung back into your face eh?
I believe that little fantasy there makes you an adulterer, no?