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  • #1

    Pray for Pope to become a True Christian™

    There is story after story about the sinful Pope. I am praying that the Pope rejects his evil Catholic background, becomes a Baptist and moves to Freehold, Iowa.

    There he can help attractive donations to Landover Baptist Church and grow our Godly community of Freehold. Please join me in this prayer.

    Thank you.

    JJH, Mayor
    Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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  • #2
    Re: Pray for Pope to become a True Christian™

    Are you sure the Pope is not too evil to be saved? The Pope invented Viagra to improve the performance of his priests.
    5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
    To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
    James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

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    • #3
      Re: Pray for Pope to become a True Christian™

      A difficult call Brother Johnny. Rescuing the soul of the head of the death cult of mary worshipers is a big job. Wait! I'm not saying that it's too big for Jesus - He can do that but couldn't we start with someone a little smaller, like that Father Maurice Lester that hangs around here preying on newbies?

      I've been praying for a while that the old papist gets sent to Belgium or Cambodia or France or anywhere else in Europe.
      sigpic


      “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

      Author of such illuminating essays as,
      Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

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      • #4
        Re: Pray for Pope to become a True Christian™

        You know, I would have the Pope over for a cup of tea and a hot scone if he was saved and brought here to Freehold. I will pray that one day he can sit at my kitchen table and indulge in the spirit of Jesus with our community rather than being isolated from what really brings Christians together in his empty, cold Vatican with no wife to cook him a hot meal or run him a nice bath.

        Maybe I could even sprinkle a bit of that Viagra into my next batch of snickerdoodles to improve the performance of the men around here! I assume it's something that helps to clear the mind and focus one on the goodness of God?
        "She was of a great age, and had lived with a husband seven years from her virginity; And she was a widow of about fourscore and four years, which departed not from the temple, but served God with fastings and prayers night and day" - Luke 2:36-37

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        • #5
          Re: Pray for Pope to become a True Christian™

          If the Pope comes to Freehold may I suggest locking up the little boys until it's certain how Jesus answers the prayer? I don't doubt the power of The Lord, but the demons infesting the pope will most likely take a little time to exorcise. Also, don't let him wear his dress. He's probably got a few alter boys stashed in there.
          Luke 5:31
          And Jesus answering said unto them, They that are whole need not a physician; but they that are sick

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          • #6
            Re: Pray for Pope to become a True Christian™

            I am concerned about casting the spirits out in Freehold. Matthew 12:43 says that when the unclean spirit is gone out of a man, he walketh through dry places, seeking rest... Do we really want these unclean spirits wandering around Freehold? Is it possible to cast the demons out in Rome and then bring him to Freehold for re-education?
            Drama queen

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            • #7
              Re: Pray for Pope to become a True Christian™

              Originally posted by BelieverInGod View Post
              I am concerned about casting the spirits out in Freehold. Matthew 12:43 says that when the unclean spirit is gone out of a man, he walketh through dry places, seeking rest... Do we really want these unclean spirits wandering around Freehold? Is it possible to cast the demons out in Rome and then bring him to Freehold for re-education?
              Great point, Believer. We cannot risk violating scripture just for the money Mr. Pope would bring to Freehold.

              We would have to require he have all unclean spirits removed before he enters Freehold. I have to say, this looks like a bigger project than I envisioned earlier.
              JJH, Mayor
              Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

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