WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

[Brother_Percy]

Following on from Elliot Mayfields excellent A musical question. What's a sackbut? Thread, I thought i'd start this 'WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE' Thread, to discuss which Musical Instruments are for True Christians™, and which are UnGodly or Satanic (or for Queers).

Evil Instrument No 1 - The Kazoo

WikiPedia describes the Kazoo as "a device fitted that adds a "buzzing" timbral quality to a player's voice when one vocalizes into it. The kazoo is a type of mirliton - a device which modifies the sound of a person's voice by way of a vibrating membrane."

A 'Vibrating membrane'??? Does that sound like something you want your kids to play??

Let's have a look at one, shall we -



Now, I don't know what this looks like to you, but to me this looks like some sort of illegal device for smoking drugs!!!

Let's have a look at what a 'Crack Pipe' looks like, shall we -



Yes, a 'Kazoo' and a 'Crack Pipe' are the exact same thing!!

Remember, 'playing with' a Kazoo will turn your kids into junkies, drug-addicts and Homosexuals!

BEWARE!!

[eliot mayfield]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

The bagpipes. He must hate the bagpipes. I thought a sackbut was some kind of bagpipe at first.

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

The theremin--- pure evil. It's basically a kazoo with an electric plug. And take a look at the obscene statue behind the so-called "musician" in this video....

DISGUSTING!!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

The disgusting squeeze box

S'quze me for interrupting...I just HAD to.

[Larry Lee]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

I think this photo tells you everything you need to know about the Contrabass saxophone in Eb:

[Eugene Hackwith]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

God surely hates the electric guitar. It helps to produce that unGodly Rock n' Roll!

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

I think Les Paul has secured his place in Hell by taking a perfectly good musical instrument like the guitar and turning it into the electrical abomination it has become today.

And all that screeching rock and roll music that resulted is offending the ears of Godly True Christians™ the world over to this very day!

[Larry Lee]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

The worst instruments that God hates are those played by Satan and his minions.

For example -- and I surely hope there are no women present to see this -- in the photo below we see one of Satan's Booodist Tibetans holding a drum made out of a human skull and a whistle made out of a human leg:



Could any other photo more concretely show why the yellow Chinese are correct in ridding the world of the Tibetan miscreant?

[SUV]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

I heard that BANJOS were "of Satan" Right here on Landover's own Godly board, several years ago.

However, this shouldn't be anything for us White folk to have to worry about. Unless you were in the movie Deliverance.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

I heard that BANJOS were "of Satan" Right here on Landover's own Godly board, several years ago.

However, this shouldn't be anything for us White folk to have to worry about. Unless you were in the movie Deliverance.

They are Sister, they are

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

I must say that God must be completely ticked off with the organ. All I ever heard was a droning wail 5 beats behind the choir. (Job:30:31: My harp also is turned to mourning, and my organ into the voice of them that weep.*)

I recall a young but enthusiastic pastor telling me that the organ could sound like a violin <presses key = drone> or a trumpet <presses key = drone> or a bassoon <presses key = drone>. It was all the same infernal drone!

I was never so pleased as when Landover replaced that organ with the 96 piece symphony orchestra; all the instruments sound right now.

* Yes, yes, I know that there are other organs mentioned in the Bible but I feel that after 6,000 years of moaning wind, God deserves a little better!

[Nobar King]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

The glass harmonica is used for conjuring ghosts:

The word "glass harmonica" (also glassharmonica, glass armonica, Armonica de verre in French, Glasharmonika in German) refers to any instrument played by rubbing glass or crystal goblets or bowls. When Benjamin Franklin invented his mechanical version of the instrument, he called it the armonica, based on the Italian word "armonia", which means "harmony". The instrument consisting of a set of wine glasses (usually tuned with water) is generally known in English as "musical glasses" or "glass harp".
It can also be referred to as a "ghost fiddle".

A glass harp - or Seraphim -, the ancestor of the Glass harmonica being played in Rome, Italy. The rims of wine glasses filled with water are rubbed by the player's fingers to create the notes.

[Nobar King]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

I also nominate the theremin. How can it even be an instrument if you never touch it?

[Mr. Jingles]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

The glass harmonica is used for conjuring ghosts:

I'm sure the regular mouth harmonica is on God's list of evil instruments. They are commonly used by blues musicians, a form of music that has sent almost as many people to Hell as rock & roll has.

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: WHICH MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DOES GOD HATE ??

The digeridoo, supposedly the musical istruments of the Australio-Negroids, is surely a tool of Satan..... at least it LOOKS like Satan's tool.