Men, get your paddles, rods, and knuckles ready: recession means rebellion among the inferior sex:
Economic stresses often lead to more frequent abuse, more violent abuse, and more dangerous abuse when domestic violence already exists.
Why would that be? Obviously, because recessions cause women to become uppity more often, to have especially vicious outbreaks of uppityness, and even to stray close to witchcraft, a sin which carries the death sentence among those who truly believe the Bible.
Domestic violence programs report that victims experience an increase in abuse in part because out-of-work abusers have more opportunity to batter.
Read: spending more time at home, with your wife, means more opportunities for your wife to attack you with uppitiness.
Rhode Island, for example, has recently seen a 25 percent increase in felony-level domestic violence crimes.
Which means that last year they had 10 wives spanked and this year it's 12 and a half. Everybody knows that Rhode Island is filled with pansy half-men who are too scared of their wives to spank them.
The good news that while we will face a wave of uppityness, we will be able to dicipline our wives without having them escape the consequences of their uppityness by running away to some "abused woman's shelter". For this we owe thanks to the republicans in the White House and Congress:
The census report found that in one day...more than 7,700 victims who sought services from their local domestic violence programs were not served because the programs didn't have enough funding and resources...
In 2008, the Family Violence Prevention and Services Act budget was slashed by $2.1 million. Congress has capped the Victims of Crime Act, a federal grant program funded entirely by fines and penalties paid by offenders without any taxpayer dollars.
On the federal level, two key funding sources to serve millions of victims of domestic violence, sexual assault, and other crimes must be restored. In 2008, the Family Violence Prevention and Services Act budget was slashed by $2.1 million. Congress has capped the Victims of Crime Act, a federal grant program funded entirely by fines and penalties paid by offenders without any taxpayer dollars.
Charging a fine to the victim of a rebellious wife? That's just backward. Thank the Lord that these man-hating entitlement programs are being cut.
Economic stresses often lead to more frequent abuse, more violent abuse, and more dangerous abuse when domestic violence already exists.
Why would that be? Obviously, because recessions cause women to become uppity more often, to have especially vicious outbreaks of uppityness, and even to stray close to witchcraft, a sin which carries the death sentence among those who truly believe the Bible.
Domestic violence programs report that victims experience an increase in abuse in part because out-of-work abusers have more opportunity to batter.
Read: spending more time at home, with your wife, means more opportunities for your wife to attack you with uppitiness.
Rhode Island, for example, has recently seen a 25 percent increase in felony-level domestic violence crimes.
Which means that last year they had 10 wives spanked and this year it's 12 and a half. Everybody knows that Rhode Island is filled with pansy half-men who are too scared of their wives to spank them.
The good news that while we will face a wave of uppityness, we will be able to dicipline our wives without having them escape the consequences of their uppityness by running away to some "abused woman's shelter". For this we owe thanks to the republicans in the White House and Congress:
The census report found that in one day...more than 7,700 victims who sought services from their local domestic violence programs were not served because the programs didn't have enough funding and resources...
In 2008, the Family Violence Prevention and Services Act budget was slashed by $2.1 million. Congress has capped the Victims of Crime Act, a federal grant program funded entirely by fines and penalties paid by offenders without any taxpayer dollars.
On the federal level, two key funding sources to serve millions of victims of domestic violence, sexual assault, and other crimes must be restored. In 2008, the Family Violence Prevention and Services Act budget was slashed by $2.1 million. Congress has capped the Victims of Crime Act, a federal grant program funded entirely by fines and penalties paid by offenders without any taxpayer dollars.
Charging a fine to the victim of a rebellious wife? That's just backward. Thank the Lord that these man-hating entitlement programs are being cut.

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