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  • #31
    Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

    If you Landoverites believe in the truth of the entire KJV 1611 Bible, then you must believe that women have souls:

    Originally posted by Genesis 35:16-19
    And they journeyed from Bethel; and there was but a little way to come to Ephrath: and Rachel travailed, and she had hard labour. And it came to pass, when she was in hard labour, that the midwife said unto her, Fear not; thou shalt have this son also. And it came to pass, as her soul was in departing, (for she died) that she called his name Benoni: but his father called him Benjamin. And Rachel died, and was buried in the way to Ephrath, which is Bethlehem.
    Emphasis added.

    For you own sanity, O men of Landover, I do recommend that you not declare that women have no souls. Much better to do a tactical retreat than to tread upon that minefield.
    ...as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3:12-14 (emphasis mine)

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    • #32
      Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

      Originally posted by StarrKingGrad View Post
      Originally posted by Genesis 35:16-19
      And they journeyed from Bethel; and there was but a little way to come to Ephrath: and Rachel travailed, and she had hard labour. And it came to pass, when she was in hard labour, that the midwife said unto her, Fear not; thou shalt have this son also. And it came to pass, as her soul was in departing, (for she died) that she called his name Benoni: but his father called him Benjamin. And Rachel died, and was buried in the way to Ephrath, which is Bethlehem.
      So Rev. Green was right. Women have 1/350th of a soul. What remains unclear is whether or not God saves more than one out of every 350 women.
      sigpic

      I loved Newt before Newt was invincible

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      • #33
        Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

        Originally posted by Larry Lee View Post
        So Rev. Green was right. Women have 1/350th of a soul. What remains unclear is whether or not God saves more than one out of every 350 women.
        It is still somewhat ambiguous Brother Lee. God could have been looking for some kind of representative democracy by accepting one out of every 350 women. On the other hand, He could let women in with 1/350th of a soul and they could continue to have a minor role in the affairs of heaven in the same proportions as here on earth.

        I have heard that there are women that enthusiastically drink sperm, perhaps in the mistaken notion that they could acquire more than their fractional allocation of a soul. By that measure they would have to drink it only 349 times.
        Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
        brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
        ...and get off my lawn
        sigpic

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        • #34
          Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

          Originally posted by StarrKingGrad View Post
          If you Landoverites believe in the truth of the entire KJV 1611 Bible, then you must believe that women have souls:
          Genesis 35:16-19
          And they journeyed from Bethel; and there was but a little way to come to Ephrath: and Rachel travailed, and she had hard labour. And it came to pass, when she was in hard labour, that the midwife said unto her, Fear not; thou shalt have this son also. And it came to pass, as her soul was in departing, (for she died) that she called his name Benoni: but his father called him Benjamin. And Rachel died, and was buried in the way to Ephrath, which is Bethlehem..
          Son, as Brother Bryan just said, this does NOT prove that God gave all women a soul. All this proves is that God gave RACHEL a soul - probably because of the kind of Godly woman she was.

          Remember, Rachel was a good and loving wife to Jacob. She protected her husband against Laban, when she found out Laban was worshipping false Gods. She hid Laban's false idols from him, to protect her husband from satanic attack. Only a Godly woman would put her own life in danger like that, by standing against someone as dangerous as a satanic false-God-worshipping cultist, to protect her own husband! Glory! Rachel gave Jacob two sons, one of whom was Joseph, the other of whom, Benjamin, who she died in childbirth for. You would find it hard to find a more worthy woman. Obviously God gave her an immortal soul as a REWARD for all those things! Praise!

          However, I have YET to find a passage in the Bible that teaches either that God that gave ALL women souls, or that secular woman have souls. Do you know why? BECAUSE THEY DON'T EXIST!

          But at least we know that worthy True Christian women are given souls by God! Glory to God!

          By this, then, we can take it that either -

          1. God gives SOME women souls (The ones who deserve it)

          or

          2. That ALL women have 1/350th of a soul (Except for women with spina bifida, downs syndrome, thalidomide and other spastic retardations - all those have NO souls).


          In Christ,

          Rev RG Green

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          • #35
            Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

            Originally posted by revrggreen View Post
            But at least we know that worthy True Christian women are given souls by God! Glory to God!

            By this, then, we can take it that either -

            1. God gives SOME women souls (The ones who deserve it)

            or

            2. That ALL women have 1/350th of a soul (Except for women with spina bifida, downs syndrome, thalidomide and other spastic retardations - all those have NO souls).
            I suppose God might personally intercede in human affairs and grant a soul to one out of every 350 women.

            OR

            Brother WJB might be onto something, when he suggests that some women pursue God's righteousness from a very pragmatic understanding of where Godliness resides.

            Originally posted by WilliamJenningsBryan View Post
            I have heard that there are women that enthusiastically drink sperm, perhaps in the mistaken notion that they could acquire more than their fractional allocation of a soul. By that measure they would have to drink it only 349 times.
            Given the Lord's perplexing lack of claity in regards to women and souls, let no man impede a sister's spiritual quest.
            sigpic

            I loved Newt before Newt was invincible

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            • #36
              Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

              I'm going to start by stating that I believe that spirit and soul are made-up ideas created by humans to help cope with the idea that we're better than the animals that seperate us. From there, if there was anything designated such as a spirit or a soul, it is our consciousness, and both men and women have it.

              Now that's out of me, let me propose alternative ideas to your theories. If you combined all the mass of the bones in a body, one rib has more mass than 1/350th of the combines mass, thus in total weight women must have more than 1/350th of a soul. Also, whose to say that God can't create woman from a single cell, I sure as hell am not or I might get another infraction? Thus I believe that the measured amount of a woman's soul should be the weight of one rib compared to the weight of the whole body.

              Let me remind you, I don't believe in the "idea" of a soul, and if such a thing existed, then women and men equally share them.
              I would like you to meet my imaginary friend, God.

              "...as Christians we deal with the truth, just because something is written down in a book doesn't mean it happened." - Bobby-Joe

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              • #37
                Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

                First of all, forgive me Jesus for posting on the Men's forum. I voted NO. But I really don't think it matters because all of us women are daughters of EVE and besides being unclean possessions, we have beyond a shadow of doubt inherited the sins of EVE. To believe anything else is to go against the Bible and once you do that, you might as well be a Devil worshipper.

                But I do think Jesus will take it easier on the Ladies of Landover, especially if we keep our husbands happy. HOPEFUL GLENDORA
                Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.

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                • #38
                  Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

                  Originally posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
                  First of all, forgive me Jesus for posting on the Men's forum. I voted NO. But I really don't think it matters because all of us women are daughters of EVE and besides being unclean possessions, we have beyond a shadow of doubt inherited the sins of EVE. To believe anything else is to go against the Bible and once you do that, you might as well be a Devil worshipper.

                  But I do think Jesus will take it easier on the Ladies of Landover, especially if we keep our husbands happy. HOPEFUL GLENDORA
                  If you believe that you don't have a soul, then you are destined to go to Hell. If it does not matter, then you should live the life you have here, on earth, to the fullest. Be as happy as you can while you still have the choice to be happy.
                  I would like you to meet my imaginary friend, God.

                  "...as Christians we deal with the truth, just because something is written down in a book doesn't mean it happened." - Bobby-Joe

                  Comment


                  • #39
                    Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

                    Originally posted by LyingDingDong View Post
                    If you believe that you don't have a soul, then you are destined to go to Hell. If it does not matter, then you should live the life you have here, on earth, to the fullest. Be as happy as you can while you still have the choice to be happy.
                    This is OK advice for a fool who doesn't believe in GOD. But anyone who believes in GOD also believes in the Devil. Its sort of like peanut butter and jelly. Anyway, that old Devil is probably taking his Viagra right now in anticipation of your arrival.
                    Attached Files
                    Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.

                    Comment


                    • #40
                      Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

                      Originally posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
                      This is OK advice for a fool who doesn't believe in GOD. But anyone who believes in GOD also believes in the Devil. Its sort of like peanut butter and jelly. Anyway, that old Devil is probably taking his Viagra right now in anticipation of your arrival.
                      What about your arrival? Do you not fear the rath of the devil?
                      I would like you to meet my imaginary friend, God.

                      "...as Christians we deal with the truth, just because something is written down in a book doesn't mean it happened." - Bobby-Joe

                      Comment


                      • #41
                        Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

                        Originally posted by LyingDingDong View Post
                        What about your arrival? Do you not fear the wrath of the devil?
                        And here you expose your own lack of ability to reason (and spell): if women had no soul, yet were True Christians, what power would Satan have over them? None!

                        God never intended that Satan should ever have an easy time. Thus, the only reasonable conclusion to a woman’s trip on the down-elevator would be that women have a God Given Duty to descend to the Netherworld to torment Satan, by mentioning that the garage needs tidying or the garden seeing to,
                        or telling him to
                        • “Clean up the place!” or
                        • “Look at that mess” or
                        • “Stop staring at the TV!” or
                        • standing in front of said TV just when the touchdown is about to be scored or
                        • insisting he goes shopping for shoes with them or
                        • Pointing out that he has put on weight or
                        • Insisting on repeating things like how they have a headache and never listening to the answers or
                        • making disparaging comments about the size of his tallywhacker or
                        • just talking and talking.
                        • Etc.


                        For information, I voted yes for 1/350 but I keep an open mind… unlike some Unsaved Trash…
                        sigpic


                        “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

                        Author of such illuminating essays as,
                        Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

                        Comment


                        • #42
                          Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

                          Originally posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
                          And here you expose your own lack of ability to reason (and spell): if women had no soul, yet were True Christians, what power would Satan have over them? None!

                          God never intended that Satan should ever have an easy time. Thus, the only reasonable conclusion to a woman’s trip on the down-elevator would be that women have a God Given Duty to descend to the Netherworld to torment Satan, by mentioning that the garage needs tidying or the garden seeing to,
                          or telling him to
                          • “Clean up the place!” or
                          • “Look at that mess” or
                          • “Stop staring at the TV!” or
                          • standing in front of said TV just when the touchdown is about to be scored or
                          • insisting he goes shopping for shoes with them or
                          • Pointing out that he has put on weight or
                          • Insisting on repeating things like how they have a headache and never listening to the answers or
                          • making disparaging comments about the size of his tallywhacker or
                          • just talking and talking.
                          • Etc.

                          For information, I voted yes for 1/350 but I keep an open mind… unlike some Unsaved Trash…
                          That was funny, I like how this place can be completely different from me and soceity, but still enjoy stereotypical jokes. But my questions still have not been answered. Realistically women should make the best of their lives on Earth if they're innevitable desetination is Hell. Also why would women have 1/350th soul and not the combined mass of the body compared to the rib, like I mentioned in one of my previous posts.
                          I would like you to meet my imaginary friend, God.

                          "...as Christians we deal with the truth, just because something is written down in a book doesn't mean it happened." - Bobby-Joe

                          Comment


                          • #43
                            Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

                            Originally posted by LyingDingDong View Post
                            That was funny, I like how this place can be completely different from me and soceity, but still enjoy stereotypical jokes.
                            What jokes?
                            Who Will Jesus Damn?

                            Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                            Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                            Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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                            • #44
                              Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

                              Originally posted by Maggoty Old Crone View Post
                              You left off the correct answer - women have every bit as much of a soul as men.

                              I agree and im a WOMAN hear me ROAR!

                              Comment


                              • #45
                                Re: POLL: Do women have souls?

                                Originally posted by DebbieD1026 View Post
                                I agree and im a WOMAN hear me ROAR!
                                Oh, so you're not a firefighter anymore? Or a lumberjack?
                                Who Will Jesus Damn?

                                Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                                Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                                Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                                Comment

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