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  • Apotheosis
    Unsaved trash
    • Apr 2012
    • 26

    #136
    Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

    We should just stone all of the homosexuals. We can ask our women which men are attractive. A straight man wouldn't delve his time gawking at himself in the mirror to ensure proper appearance. On a 1-10 scale I'd say the magic number would be 7. All the men a committee of women rate above seven should be stoned PERIOD!

    Comment

    • Pastor Ezekiel
      Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
       
      • Sep 2006
      • 78552

      #137
      Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

      Originally posted by Apotheosis View Post
      We should just stone all of the homosexuals. We can ask our women which men are attractive. A straight man wouldn't delve his time gawking at himself in the mirror to ensure proper appearance. On a 1-10 scale I'd say the magic number would be 7. All the men a committee of women rate above seven should be stoned PERIOD!

      Numerology is a sin.

      Also, we are commanded to obey secular law.

      Read your Bible.
      Who Will Jesus Damn?

      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

      Comment

      • Masterchef
        Confirmed Enemy of God
        BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
        • Apr 2012
        • 5

        #138
        Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

        Can I be gay for Jesus?
        What if Jesus is gay for me? He's got long hair like those fellas that dress like women

        Comment

        • Roberta
          Anti La Leche League Organizer
          True Christian™
          • Jan 2008
          • 1817

          #139
          Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

          Originally posted by Masterchef View Post
          Can I be gay for Jesus?
          What if Jesus is gay for me? He's got long hair like those fellas that dress like women
          Is school closed today for Easter, Chief? You are very close being banned.

          Watch what you say here, boy.
          Come climb my mountains.

          Comment

          • Masterchef
            Confirmed Enemy of God
            BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
            • Apr 2012
            • 5

            #140
            Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

            School is not closed
            God gave me this iPod so I could post during school
            THANK YOU JESUS

            Comment

            • Pastor Isaac Peters
              Senior Pastor
              Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
              Always Biblically correct
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 10639

              #141
              Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

              Originally posted by Masterchef View Post
              He's got long hair like those fellas that dress like women
              Back it up with Scripture.
              This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

              Questions to ask liberal "Christians" âśž Things that the Bible doesn't say âśž Tolerance

              sigpic

              Comment

              • Justagirl_
                Unsaved trash, suspected french whore
                • Apr 2012
                • 12

                #142
                Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

                So I want to tell you something and ask you a question right after it!
                My English isn't that good, so sorry for the errors.

                I don't think it's a bad thing that people stand behind their beliefs, it's what keeps people going. And the people here believe in Jesus and God, and so do I.
                I'm a well-rased Christian, and I'm 15 now. I go to church each week, pray 3 times a day and so much more.
                But why can't people stand behind their beliefs that are different from ours?
                It doesn't mean that we should stop believing in what keeps us going, we just have to accept that there are people believing in other Gods.

                And what about the same-gender-relationships hate?
                is it because it wasn't meant to be by God? Well, maybe it wasn't, but more things weren't meant to be.
                I actually am raised by two fathers, after they took me away from my family because my actual dad used me.
                They are beautiful persons, and they're gay. So what? My biological parents weren't and they weren't as good as they are. They love more than I have ever hoped and they raised me very well.

                Why all the hate, love is love.

                Comment

                • Redeemed Papist
                  Former Mary Hailer who has seen The Light(c)
                  True Christian™
                  • Jul 2011
                  • 10409

                  #143
                  Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

                  Originally posted by Justagirl_ View Post
                  So I want to tell you something and ask you a question right after it!
                  My English isn't that good, so sorry for the errors.

                  I don't think it's a bad thing that people stand behind their beliefs, it's what keeps people going. And the people here believe in Jesus and God, and so do I.
                  I'm a well-rased Christian, and I'm 15 now. I go to church each week, pray 3 times a day and so much more.
                  But why can't people stand behind their beliefs that are different from ours?
                  It doesn't mean that we should stop believing in what keeps us going, we just have to accept that there are people believing in other Gods.

                  And what about the same-gender-relationships hate?
                  is it because it wasn't meant to be by God? Well, maybe it wasn't, but more things weren't meant to be.
                  I actually am raised by two fathers, after they took me away from my family because my actual dad used me.
                  They are beautiful persons, and they're gay. So what? My biological parents weren't and they weren't as good as they are. They love more than I have ever hoped and they raised me very well.

                  Why all the hate, love is love.
                  God says gays are an abomination. That's good enough for me. Why is it not good enough for you? I know it's hard for you to turn your back on your (ahem) "fathers" but you really ought to if you love your immortal soul.
                  Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                  This has to be easy for you, given the gayness angle. Good luck.
                  sigpic
                  Isaiah 34:6 The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness, and with the blood of lambs and goats, with the fat of the kidneys of rams: for the LORD hath a sacrifice in Bozrah, and a great slaughter in the land of Idumea.

                  John 5:46,47 For had ye believed Moses, ye would have believed me: for he wrote of me. But if ye believe not his writings, how shall ye believe my words?

                  Join me in scoffing at backwards Muslims clinging to their beliefs in the face of the evidence!
                  The truth about volcanos
                  Sex and debauchery in public schools
                  Faith wins over science (explained for even the very stupid)
                  God Cures AIDS - GLORY!
                  Desert whale bones prove Great Flood once and for all.

                  Comment

                  • Capt. Aaron Portway
                    One of the Lord's Airborne Rangers
                    Salvation from Above
                    God's Favorite Pilot™
                    True Christian™
                    • Sep 2008
                    • 6309

                    #144
                    Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

                    Originally posted by Justagirl_ View Post
                    So I want to tell you something and ask you a question right after it!
                    My English isn't that good, so sorry for the errors.

                    I don't think it's a bad thing that people stand behind their beliefs, it's what keeps people going. And the people here believe in Jesus and God, and so do I.
                    I'm a well-rased Christian, and I'm 15 now. I go to church each week, pray 3 times a day and so much more.
                    But why can't people stand behind their beliefs that are different from ours?
                    It doesn't mean that we should stop believing in what keeps us going, we just have to accept that there are people believing in other Gods.

                    And what about the same-gender-relationships hate?
                    is it because it wasn't meant to be by God? Well, maybe it wasn't, but more things weren't meant to be.
                    I actually am raised by two fathers, after they took me away from my family because my actual dad used me.
                    They are beautiful persons, and they're gay. So what? My biological parents weren't and they weren't as good as they are. They love more than I have ever hoped and they raised me very well.

                    Why all the hate, love is love.
                    All fags are pervert pedophiles. The only reason your "fathers" didn't constantly rape you while you were growing up is because you're a girl. Now, I know that because you're a mere female, these two queers were able to fool you into believing that they loved and cared for you. But I am 100% positive that they have both been raping little boys behind your back all these years.

                    Homos can't help it, it's in their nature. Like atheists, fags have no moral compass. And if you don't believe me, just read the Bible. God commands us to kill sodomites. He commands this to protect innocent children from predators like the two abominations that you call your parents!

                    If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
                    Leviticus 20:13
                    sigpic


                    Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



                    God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



                    Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!

                    Comment

                    • Justagirl_
                      Unsaved trash, suspected french whore
                      • Apr 2012
                      • 12

                      #145
                      Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

                      Originally posted by Redeemed Papist View Post
                      God says gays are an abomination. That's good enough for me. Why is it not good enough for you? I know it's hard for you to turn your back on your (ahem) "fathers" but you really ought to if you love your immortal soul.
                      Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                      This has to be easy for you, given the gayness angle. Good luck.
                      I believe in God, but not everything that's said is right. If God said that you would have to kill your wife, parents and rape all your children, would you do it?
                      If you say yes: I think you're an horrible person. It's good for people to believe, but not if it causes this cruelty.
                      No? Well why would you think it's bad?

                      Comment

                      • Redeemed Papist
                        Former Mary Hailer who has seen The Light(c)
                        True Christian™
                        • Jul 2011
                        • 10409

                        #146
                        Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

                        Originally posted by Justagirl_ View Post
                        I believe in God, but not everything that's said is right.
                        How do you tell which bits God didn't really mean?
                        Deuteronomy 4:2 Ye shall not add unto the word which I command you, neither shall ye diminish ought from it, that ye may keep the commandments of the LORD your God which I command you.
                        sigpic
                        Isaiah 34:6 The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness, and with the blood of lambs and goats, with the fat of the kidneys of rams: for the LORD hath a sacrifice in Bozrah, and a great slaughter in the land of Idumea.

                        John 5:46,47 For had ye believed Moses, ye would have believed me: for he wrote of me. But if ye believe not his writings, how shall ye believe my words?

                        Join me in scoffing at backwards Muslims clinging to their beliefs in the face of the evidence!
                        The truth about volcanos
                        Sex and debauchery in public schools
                        Faith wins over science (explained for even the very stupid)
                        God Cures AIDS - GLORY!
                        Desert whale bones prove Great Flood once and for all.

                        Comment

                        • Justagirl_
                          Unsaved trash, suspected french whore
                          • Apr 2012
                          • 12

                          #147
                          Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

                          Originally posted by Capt. A. Portway View Post
                          All fags are pervert pedophiles. The only reason your "fathers" didn't constantly rape you while you were growing up is because you're a girl. Now, I know that because you're a mere female, these two queers were able to fool you into believing that they loved and cared for you. But I am 100% positive that they have both been raping little boys behind your back all these years.

                          Homos can't help it, it's in their nature. Like atheists, fags have no moral compass. And if you don't believe me, just read the Bible. God commands us to kill sodomites. He commands this to protect innocent children from predators like the two abominations that you call your parents!
                          I quote you: "All fags are pervert pedophiles." Excuse me?
                          This doesn't even make sense. If this is what you believe, you should really see a doctor. Do you know that where I live, thousands of kids were abused by pedophiles, and oh they were priests.
                          So they didn't rape me because I was a girl? Really I'm laughing really loud now. I came to my fathers (and hey, I'm proud of having a dad and a daddy) a little longer than a year ago, because I went to the police after my actual dad raped me. This man was straight, and hurted me like you can hurt a person at it's worst.
                          I came with this two beautiful persons, that would die if they lost the other. It's the most pure form of love I've ever seen. They also have a son, and nope nothing happened there either.

                          aybe you guys should be a bit more open-minded

                          Comment

                          • Redeemed Papist
                            Former Mary Hailer who has seen The Light(c)
                            True Christian™
                            • Jul 2011
                            • 10409

                            #148
                            Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

                            Originally posted by Justagirl_ View Post

                            [m]aybe you guys should be a bit more open-minded
                            If by "open minded" you mean claiming to believe in a God who explicitly states via His appointed scribes in the Bible that gays should be killed in both old and new testaments but then say we shouldn't be harsh and say they should be avoided and shunned...

                            I'm not sure if you believe in God or have just made up a fluffy sky daddy to agree with you inside your head and reassure you that your opinions are beyond debate.
                            sigpic
                            Isaiah 34:6 The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness, and with the blood of lambs and goats, with the fat of the kidneys of rams: for the LORD hath a sacrifice in Bozrah, and a great slaughter in the land of Idumea.

                            John 5:46,47 For had ye believed Moses, ye would have believed me: for he wrote of me. But if ye believe not his writings, how shall ye believe my words?

                            Join me in scoffing at backwards Muslims clinging to their beliefs in the face of the evidence!
                            The truth about volcanos
                            Sex and debauchery in public schools
                            Faith wins over science (explained for even the very stupid)
                            God Cures AIDS - GLORY!
                            Desert whale bones prove Great Flood once and for all.

                            Comment

                            • Justagirl_
                              Unsaved trash, suspected french whore
                              • Apr 2012
                              • 12

                              #149
                              Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

                              Originally posted by Redeemed Papist View Post
                              How do you tell which bits God didn't really mean?
                              Deuteronomy 4:2 Ye shall not add unto the word which I command you, neither shall ye diminish ought from it, that ye may keep the commandments of the LORD your God which I command you.
                              I'm trying to tell you that you can'tt take everything in the bible litteraly.
                              You think Jesus turned wine into water? Well, you can hate me but I think they mean that he gave the people hope, and turnedsadness into happyness.

                              Comment

                              • Levi Jones
                                Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
                                Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
                                Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
                                 
                                • Jul 2009
                                • 13930

                                #150
                                Re: Welcome to Straight 4 Jesus!

                                Originally posted by Justagirl_ View Post
                                So they didn't rape me because I was a girl?
                                Correct. I assume you still are a girl? Please tell me you aren't so far into your sinful life that you have undergone surgery.

                                Originally posted by Justagirl_ View Post
                                I went to the police after my actual dad raped me. This man was straight, and hurted me like you can hurt a person at it's worst.
                                For some reason I noticed Leviticus 18 leaves out uncovering the nakedness of one's own daughter. I'm sure they meant to have it in there, though. It does mention not having sexual relations with your grandchildren.

                                Oh wait, here it is in a blanket statement.

                                Leviticus 18:6 None of you shall approach to any that is near of kin to him, to uncover their nakedness: I am the LORD.

                                In a perfect world, your father would have small rocks thrown at him until he dies slowly.
                                Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

                                Comment

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