Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

[Brother Zachary]

Good evening, Brothers and Sisters!

Hello, my name is Zachary. I am a Christian male. I have managed to overcome the Devil's trickery (Such as masturbation and loud, heavy metal death music like 'The Beatles.') Fortunately, I've come to meet new, hard working Christians like myself! My favorite bible verse is; "For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.




Amen and God Bless!

[Basilissa]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

Good evening, Brothers and Sisters!

Hello, my name is Zachary. I am a Christian male. I have managed to overcome the Devil's trickery (Such as masturbation and loud, heavy metal death music like 'The Beatles.') Fortunately, I've come to meet new, hard working Christians like myself! My favorite bible verse is; "For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.

Amen and God Bless!

Hello and to our Godly forum!

This verse is, indeed, very lovely, especially when read in context:

John 3:16-18
16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.
18 He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.

On a single breath God saves those who believe in Jesus and condemns all people who did not believe in Him, including millions of people who died without even having a chance to hear about Jesus (those who lived in the Americas before Columbus, for example), or died too young to accept Jesus (babies who died in their infancy - and that includes even the babies born to True Christian™ parents!).

Praise for the fact that He has clearly selected us to be saved, while He's busy sending the vast majority of humanity to !!

[handmaiden]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

Good evening, Brothers and Sisters!

Hello, my name is Zachary. I am a Christian male. I have managed to overcome the Devil's trickery (Such as masturbation and loud, heavy metal death music like 'The Beatles.') Fortunately, I've come to meet new, hard working Christians like myself! My favorite bible verse is; "For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.




Amen and God Bless!

I second my sister's welcome, Zachary. Isn't it great knowing that we will reside in heavenly bliss for eternity while countless others will suffer unimaginable pain that will never end?


God is great!


Joyfully Yours,
Handmaiden

[southerngirl97]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

I was lucky enough to have been raised in a Christian family so have always known the glory of God. The main point now is that you have found him now and can rejoice in His glory of eternity.

[Alvin Moss]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

Good evening, Brothers and Sisters!

Hello, my name is Zachary. I am a Christian male. I have managed to overcome the Devil's trickery (Such as masturbation and loud, heavy metal death music like 'The Beatles.') Fortunately, I've come to meet new, hard working Christians like myself! My favorite bible verse is; "For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.




Amen and God Bless!

Welcome, Zachary. It is a relief to find a Christian newly come among us after the communist agitators and atheist scum we have attracted of late. Do tell us more of your walk with Jesus. It is such a relief after the recent turmoil to hear someone who actually is interested in praising the Lord.

God Bless!

[Brother Zachary]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

I second my sister's welcome, Zachary. Isn't it great knowing that we will reside in heavenly bliss for eternity while countless others will suffer unimaginable pain that will never end?


God is great!


Joyfully Yours,
Handmaiden

Isn't it lovely? Amen! I'm so glad I got away from all that awful Devil music! Like Pink Floyd, The Beatles, and oh, don't even ask about that awful Satan "music" band called AC/DC. I am also a proud Republican!

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

A manly and brotherly welcome to you, Zach!
I am pleased to extend my hand to you, and I know you'll find respite here among the spiritually superior True Christians™ of Landover. We are a humble bunch, espousing the whole Bible as our guidebook to life. In the forums you will find much wisdom and sound Biblical teaching. Avail yourself of it as often as possible.


I completely understand your relief to be free of ungodly music. My own mother, a papist, by the way, used to enjoy a musical group called Abba. Their satanic lyrics, celebrating greed (Money, Money, Money), pedophilia (Does Your Mother Know) and gambling (The Winner Takes it All) were often playing in my home. Of course, nothing welcomes demonic possession as much as the whore Madonna, singing about fashion magazines (Vogue) and imploring her father to not enter the ministry of our Lord (Papa Don't Preach). But, PRAISE GOD, the Lord drew me out of that situation and put me in touch with the King of Kings as my Savior and Lord. I look forward to worshipping and praising Jesus with you here, friend.


BrotherLarry

[Brother Zachary]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

A manly and brotherly welcome to you, Zach!
I am pleased to extend my hand to you, and I know you'll find respite here among the spiritually superior True Christians™ of Landover. We are a humble bunch, espousing the whole Bible as our guidebook to life. In the forums you will find much wisdom and sound Biblical teaching. Avail yourself of it as often as possible.


I completely understand your relief to be free of ungodly music. My own mother, a papist, by the way, used to enjoy a musical group called Abba. Their satanic lyrics, celebrating greed (Money, Money, Money), pedophilia (Does Your Mother Know) and gambling (The Winner Takes it All) were often playing in my home. Of course, nothing welcomes demonic possession as much as the whore Madonna, singing about fashion magazines (Vogue) and imploring her father to not enter the ministry of our Lord (Papa Don't Preach). But, PRAISE GOD, the Lord drew me out of that situation and put me in touch with the King of Kings as my Savior and Lord. I look forward to worshipping and praising Jesus with you here, friend.


BrotherLarry

Amen! A pleasure to meet you, Brother Larry! I appreciate the welcome and I am glad you got away from that satanic garbage! I say we ban this satanic nonsense! All of it!

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

For somebody who claims not to like heavy metal music, you sure do bring it up an awful lot.

[Brother Zachary]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

For somebody who claims not to like heavy metal music, you sure do bring it up an awful lot.

Of course, friend! If one does not understand it, how can they stop it? We bring up Satanists all the time, does that mean we love them? Of course not! Neither does God!

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

What do you mean, "we"?

You have not earned the right to speak as if you're one of us, sinner!

All I've seen you do is come in here and prove you're just another one-verse Charlie, quoting John 3:16 as if it's a get-out-of-Hell-free card.

Where is your tithe money?

[Brother Zachary]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

What do you mean, "we"?

You have not earned the right to speak as if you're one of us, sinner!

All I've seen you do is come in here and prove you're just another one-verse Charlie, quoting John 3:16 as if it's a get-out-of-Hell-free card.

Where is your tithe money?

Brother, I have not meant to insult you. I am simply a Christian man who is interested in serving his Savior. I believe it is very unfair to refer to me as a; "One Verse Charlie". Yes, unfortunately, I have sinned and I continue to pray to our Lord for forgiveness, thanks to the sacrifices of Jesus.


Amen and have an excellent day, brother!

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

Then let's hear what other verses really speak to you.

Here's an idea: Without using Google, tell us which Bible verse (or verses) prohibit you from having a bowel movement inside your camp, and instead instruct you to move your bowels outside the camp, and then bury your filth.

I love that part of the Bible, because before I got saved and started reading God's word, well, let's just say my ignorance had caused me to ruin a few camping trips.

[Brother Zachary]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

Then let's hear what other verses really speak to you.

Here's an idea: Without using Google, tell us which Bible verse (or verses) prohibit you from having a bowel movement inside your camp, and instead instruct you to move your bowels outside the camp, and then bury your filth.

I love that part of the Bible, because before I got saved and started reading God's word, well, let's just say my ignorance had caused me to ruin a few camping trips.

Brother, I believe you mean; "And thou shalt have a paddle upon thy weapon; and it shall be, when thou wilt ease thyself abroad, thou shalt dig therewith, and shalt turn back and cover that which cometh from thee"


Deuteronomy 23:13, I believe you're looking for, Brother.

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: Hello, Brothers and Sisters!

Hello, young man. You will pardon my somewhat late and trepidatious welcome to Landover Baptist Church.

As a recovering homo-rectalist and predatory Sodomite, I must be certain that new members do not threaten my walk with Jesus. Like an alcoholic, men that have chosen to be queer can relapse to the analoid demons very easily. Any veiled reference to mud-packing can be catastrophic for the ex-gay.

Many new posters pose as Christians, when bukake faggery and colonic conquest is really why they are here. I do not sense this in you.

May you prosper and serve Him.

Fag-free and in Christ.