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  • 666yum
    Confirmed Enemy of God
    BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
    • May 2009
    • 1

    #1

    Who is Jesus again??

    Wow. I can not believe that there are still people who actually believe in god. You are dumb. However, the part in the bible where Jack grows the beanstalk is amazing. Oh never mind that was not in the bible; I was thinking of the part where Jonas lives in a whale for two days. I sometimes mix up the bible with fairytales. Immaculate conception is not possible, Mary was just a whore. But its alright, immaculate conception was written out of the New Testament so maybe we can rewrite the entire bible every time an aspect is proven wrong by science. The bible was written before modern science so there can not be any scientific facts in it. Regarding this post: masturbation reduces the risk testicular and cervical cancer (proven by science) so god must want you to increase your chances of getting cancer and you don't have the right to judge people or punish them for anything (according to the law and the bible). The bible also infers that the Earth is only about 5000 years old. Carbon dating that correlates with the depths of fossils found proves that Earth is about 4 billion years old. Also evolution has been proven, anyone who has taken a general biology course in college can see that genetic mutations change all of the DNA after the point of mutation and with the right combo... monkey-->human happens. There aren't any variances because it wouldn't work otherwise, its just chance. Infinite time = infinite possibilities (4 billion years is almost infinite). People just stick with religion because they want to believe that there is something more out there for what they can not explain. You only became a christian because people around you were also Christians so it was the popular thing to do and they influenced you in some way. If you grew up in an Islamic community you would be Muslim (but still wrong). It doesn't matter how YOU "found god" he did not come find you. He doesn't talk to you either and if you have voices speaking to you...that's just crazy. Miracles are bullllllshit. It is also psychologically deteriorating restrict your life and to guilt yourself for "sinning." If I am wrong and go to hell (with all the cool people and bands), oh well, I am just one person. If you are wrong...so is a huge population of the world and you wasted your life for a religion that is fake. fartlickers.
  • Natashia
    Unsaved trash, God Mocker
     
    • May 2009
    • 30

    #2
    Re: Who is Jesus again??

    Originally posted by 666yum View Post
    Wow. I can not believe that there are still people who actually believe in god. You are dumb. However, the part in the bible where Jack grows the beanstalk is amazing. Oh never mind that was not in the bible; I was thinking of the part where Jonas lives in a whale for two days. I sometimes mix up the bible with fairytales. Immaculate conception is not possible, Mary was just a whore. But its alright, immaculate conception was written out of the New Testament so maybe we can rewrite the entire bible every time an aspect is proven wrong by science. The bible was written before modern science so there can not be any scientific facts in it. Regarding this post: masturbation reduces the risk testicular and cervical cancer (proven by science) so god must want you to increase your chances of getting cancer and you don't have the right to judge people or punish them for anything (according to the law and the bible). The bible also infers that the Earth is only about 5000 years old. Carbon dating that correlates with the depths of fossils found proves that Earth is about 4 billion years old. Also evolution has been proven, anyone who has taken a general biology course in college can see that genetic mutations change all of the DNA after the point of mutation and with the right combo... monkey-->human happens. There aren't any variances because it wouldn't work otherwise, its just chance. Infinite time = infinite possibilities (4 billion years is almost infinite). People just stick with religion because they want to believe that there is something more out there for what they can not explain. You only became a christian because people around you were also Christians so it was the popular thing to do and they influenced you in some way. If you grew up in an Islamic community you would be Muslim (but still wrong). It doesn't matter how YOU "found god" he did not come find you. He doesn't talk to you either and if you have voices speaking to you...that's just crazy. Miracles are bullllllshit. It is also psychologically deteriorating restrict your life and to guilt yourself for "sinning." If I am wrong and go to hell (with all the cool people and bands), oh well, I am just one person. If you are wrong...so is a huge population of the world and you wasted your life for a religion that is fake. fartlickers.
    You are misguided - I do not hate you, but I do pity you. I wish you luck on your future endeavors, and though you do not love me, I love you as Jesus loves you.
    I am Natashia, a pretty little princess and God-mocker.

    Comment

    • Rev. M. Rodimer
      Honorary True Christian™
      Forum Member
      • May 2008
      • 13996

      #3
      Re: Who is Jesus again??

      Originally posted by 666yum View Post
      Wow. I can not believe that there are still people who actually believe in god. You are dumb.
      You mean dumb like President Obama and Hillary Clinton? And dumb like nearly all Americans, given that less than 2% identify as either "atheist" or "agnostic"? Dumb like the vast majority of the world's population?

      If your profanity- and grammatical error-laden run-on paragraph (sometimes referred to as a "Wall of Text") is indicative of the intellect to which we should aspire . . . I think I'd rather be "dumb".
      Bible boring? Nonsense!
      Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
      You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

      Comment

      • Ezekiel Bathfire
        Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
        Christ's Rottweiler
         
        • Jan 2008
        • 22916

        #4
        Re: Who is Jesus again??

        tl;dr

        and there were no paragraphs. I would be obliged if someone could knock out an executive summary of the above post - does it contain anything of interest?
        sigpic


        “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

        Author of such illuminating essays as,
        Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

        Comment

        • Pastor Isaac Peters
          Senior Pastor
          Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
          Always Biblically correct
          True Christian™
          • Sep 2006
          • 10639

          #5
          Re: Who is Jesus again??

          Originally posted by 666yum View Post
          Immaculate conception is not possible, Mary was just a whore. But its alright, immaculate conception was written out of the New Testament so maybe we can rewrite the entire bible every time an aspect is proven wrong by science.
          You're confusing the virgin birth of Our Lord with the Romanist myth of immaculate conception. Before coming to our discussion board to attack our beliefs, maybe you could do a little research into what we believe.
          This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

          Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

          sigpic

          Comment

          • Natashia
            Unsaved trash, God Mocker
             
            • May 2009
            • 30

            #6
            Re: Who is Jesus again??

            Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
            You mean dumb like President Obama and Hillary Clinton? And dumb like nearly all Americans, given that less than 2% identify as either "atheist" or "agnostic"? Dumb like the vast majority of the world's population?

            If your profanity- and grammatical error-laden run-on paragraph (sometimes referred to as a "Wall of Text") is indicative of the intellect to which we should aspire . . . I think I'd rather be "dumb".
            President Obama is actually a well known Christian.
            I am Natashia, a pretty little princess and God-mocker.

            Comment

            • Rev. M. Rodimer
              Honorary True Christian™
              Forum Member
              • May 2008
              • 13996

              #7
              Re: Who is Jesus again??

              Originally posted by Natashia View Post
              President Obama is actually a well known Christian.
              That was my point.

              So is Hillary Clinton.
              Bible boring? Nonsense!
              Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
              You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

              Comment

              • Pastor Isaac Peters
                Senior Pastor
                Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
                Always Biblically correct
                True Christian™
                • Sep 2006
                • 10639

                #8
                Re: Who is Jesus again??

                Originally posted by Natashia View Post
                President Obama is actually a well known Christian.
                The next time you post on our discussion board, I suggest that you do so on a stepladder, so that the point to which you're responding won't go over your head.
                This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

                Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

                sigpic

                Comment

                • Natashia
                  Unsaved trash, God Mocker
                   
                  • May 2009
                  • 30

                  #9
                  Re: Who is Jesus again??

                  Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
                  That was my point.

                  So is Hillary Clinton.
                  My bad, I misread your original post. I apologize.
                  I am Natashia, a pretty little princess and God-mocker.

                  Comment

                  • Pastor Ezekiel
                    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                     
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 78556

                    #10
                    Re: Who is Jesus again??

                    Originally posted by Natashia View Post
                    President Obama is actually a well known Christian.
                    Unlike you and your fag buddies, who are well-known perverts and God-mockers.
                    Who Will Jesus Damn?

                    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                    Comment

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