[handmaiden]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

Then why not simply tell us the truth?
Neither were your parents.
For someone who claims to be intelligent the entire concept of logic seems to be wasted on you. What is it that you have to hide? Are you really a fat and ugly man pretending to be a woman?

Sorry about the typo, I meant write that my eggs are NOT getting any younger. Which is why God has deemed them, and by extension, me as unworthy of male appreciation.

I am not claiming to be intelligent; I am. And that is exactly what is wrong with me and so many other women in the world today. You see, God knows that intelligence is bad, so He made smart women ugly so men would not wish to marry them. God wants Fine Christian Men to marry pretty but pure girls to give them Fine Christian Sons who are not too smart so that they get weird ideas about questioning authority. And God does not really want Fine Christian Men to have daughters at all, except that women often disappoint God and give birth to such.

You claim that the entire concept of logic is wasted on me. Logic is what got me into this mess in the first place! If I hadn't insisted on finding logic in the Bible, I wouldn't have questioned my husband and God and gone out and gotten an education. Now, I am lettered and single and shooting out only Grade B eggs at best and and can only find solace in getting back to the Word of God with no expectation of ever being worthy of a man again. If I hadn't toyed with logic I'd still be married and living in a nice house with a man to support me. (Still wouldn't be getting any sex though . . . but that was my fault. I wore black underwear once. My husband was more godly than me and knew enough to be unsettled and avert his eyes.)

Passive Agressively Yours,

Handmaiden

[Jedediah]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

For someone who is so intelligent, you have exhibited little knowledge of Holy Scripture. Do you read the Bible? Which verses give you the most inspiration?

[Professor Bessemer]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

Continued Obfuscation and Evasiveness SNIPPED

You asked me to answer your questions as briefly as possilble.

And I did so politely. Yet you answered none of them. How very rude.

You have not been reading my posts.

Really? And you know this how? I have endeavored to read every single post you have made. I will admit that weariness with your verbosity may have caused me to miss a sentence or two here or there. My disappointment in your lack of respect for the True Christians™ on this forum is dulled slightly by my knowing that we are saved and that you are merely unsaved trash destined to burn for all eternity.

We are already beyond brief, therefore I will not be answering your questions.

I fear there is no reaching you and that your early posts where you feigned an understanding of your true position in God's plan was simply a ruse. I am more and more convinced that your real goal is simply to persecute the saved True Christians™ on this holy forum.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

You claim that the entire concept of logic is wasted on me.

Indeed...

Logic is what got me into this mess in the first place!

Actually, I think it is complete and utter lack of logic that got you into this mess you call a life.

shooting out only Grade B eggs at best

Can we please stop with the egg stories?

[handmaiden]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

For someone who is so intelligent, you have exhibited little knowledge of Holy Scripture. Do you read the Bible? Which verses give you the most inspiration?

Well, I like the story about Elisha and how God sent a she bear to tear apart the little children who teased him about being bald and all.


Back then kids behaved or else, ya know?

And about that Apostle Paul, hah? Was that a Man of God or what? He knew how to put a woman in her place. He once bored a man to death, then raised from the dead. AND the guy sewed his own tents. Most importantly, the Pauline doctrines are so clearly written that no one could ever be confused about God's Will and how a True Christian should live his or her life. It's all spelled out in simple easy to understand prose. Not only that, but Paul was sort of a "badass" for Christ. He got into trouble all the time, he told it like it was to EVERYONE, got kicked out of cities, locked up in jail, drank in moderation, performed a bris here and there.

You know, if someone wanted to make a TV show about Paul and his faithful companion, Luke, I would totally watch that show. Until the third season or so, when Luke gets replaced by Timothy. I mean, Timothy's okay and all, but Luke's got maturity and he wrote a Gospel and Acts. Timothy seems a little colorless besides him. But Paul, man, . . . I'm sorry, what were we talking about, again?

Distractedly Yours,

Handmaiden

[Robert Jones]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

Well, I like the story about Elisha and how God sent a she bear to tear apart the little children who teased him about being bald and all.


Back then kids behaved or else, ya know?

And about that Apostle Paul, hah? Was that a Man of God or what? He knew how to put a woman in her place. He once bored a man to death, then raised from the dead. AND the guy sewed his own tents. Most importantly, the Pauline doctrines are so clearly written that no one could ever be confused about God's Will and how a True Christian should live his or her life. It's all spelled out in simple easy to understand prose. Not only that, but Paul was sort of a "badass" for Christ. He got into trouble all the time, he told it like it was to EVERYONE, got kicked out of cities, locked up in jail, drank in moderation, performed a bris here and there.

You know, if someone wanted to make a TV show about Paul and his faithful companion, Luke, I would totally watch that show. Until the third season or so, when Luke gets replaced by Timothy. I mean, Timothy's okay and all, but Luke's got maturity and he wrote a Gospel and Acts. Timothy seems a little colorless besides him. But Paul, man, . . . I'm sorry, what were we talking about, again?

Distractedly Yours,

Handmaiden

This is a clear example why women should not be educated. My wife would never step out of line like this women has. I think someone has some soul searching to do and needs to thoroughly look to scripture to relearn, assuming she ever knew, the role of women in Christianity. I see her constantly referring to scripture, but never actually using the Bible. You are certainly not submissive any shape or form. Saying that you should silent is one thing, but actually being silent is completely different. I've never seen such hypocrisy is someone claiming to be a True Christian™.

[handmaiden]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

This is a clear example why women should not be educated. My wife would never step out of line like this women has. I think someone has some soul searching to do and needs to thoroughly look to scripture to relearn, assuming she ever knew, the role of women in Christianity. I see her constantly referring to scripture, but never actually using the Bible. You are certainly not submissive any shape or form. Saying that you should silent is one thing, but actually being silent is completely different. I've never seen such hypocrisy is someone claiming to be a True Christian™.

When you refer to "using the Bible" do you mean that I should include chapter and verse citation with every reference that I make? Or do I need to write out the whole verse that I'm talking about when I make any reference to it? I could do that if you need me to, but that would make my posts even longer . . .

Briefly Yours,

Handmaiden


p.s. I guess I don't get any points for remembering and being able to discuss this stuff without actually having to look it up, huh?

[Robert Jones]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

When you refer to "using the Bible" do you mean that I should include chapter and verse citation with every reference that I make? Or do I need to write out the whole verse that I'm talking about when I make any reference to it? I could do that if you need me to, but that would make my posts even longer . . .

Briefly Yours,

Handmaiden


p.s. I guess I don't get any points for remembering and being able to discuss this stuff without actually having to look it up, huh?

If you refer to a verse you should be able to quote it as you should have the chapter and verse memorized. The Bible is not something that you should just recall a verse, each scripture is Holy and you must be sure not to change or mistake anything that may change the Word Of God. Pastors are able to refer to scripture because they have an understanding of the Bible that no women could have.

[The Hand]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

The True Christian™ Man is confident in his abilities and unwavering in his belief. He will take it upon himself to chastise himself on the rare occasion he needs to, and have the ability to do so quickly and efficiently, without further ado. He will think things through thoroughly before opening his mouth to speak, and when he speaks, men listen, as a mark of mutual respect for each another. He will rarely waste words.

See, the wayward woman highlights the flaws of the weaker gender, needs constant reassurance and comfort, constant attention, constant validation and support. She is nothing but a distraction whenever she opens her mouth. The wayward woman is always in conflict with herself, always unsure of herself, and it takes a man to put her in her place, but it’s a never ending job. From the beginning it was like this - from Eve to the ‘modern woman’. Always hen-pecking and nagging, mainly about petty and insignificant things that a man would cut through and dispose of with simple common sense.

A True Christian™ Lady however, knows her place and is happy and thankful for her lot in life, mindful of her duties and never over-extends herself. She knows her limits and never makes a fool out of herself in such a manner. She welcomes correction and takes it on board. She learns from her man and endeavours to never make the same error twice.

The wayward woman would do well to reflect upon her actions in her own time, and think long and hard about the words men say to her, and open her mouth only when she is sure she will not distract True Christian™ Men from their important business. The golden rule should be: when in doubt, keep your mouth shut.

[handmaiden]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

The True Christian™ Man is confident in his abilities and unwavering in his belief.



A True Christian™ Lady however, knows her place and is happy and thankful for her lot in life, mindful of her duties and never over-extends herself. She knows her limits and never makes a fool out of herself in such a manner. She welcomes correction and takes it on board. She learns from her man and endeavours to never make the same error twice.

I could listen to you all day. . . . . Actually, I think that I was married to you for 14 years. Are you sure you're not my ex-husband? How's the new, younger wife?

Don't worry. dear. I'm back with Lord now, so I won't burn in hell and make you look bad. I will spend the rest of my days as a bitter, ugly hag on a limited income. God couldn't let me off for my years of straying without some punishment.

Discardedly Yours,

Handmaiden

[The Hand]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

No, love. I would not have put up with you for 14 straight years. You would have learnt your place long before that.

Know thyself, woman.

[Seth Campbell]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

I could listen to you all day. . . . . Actually, I think that I was married to you for 14 years. Are you sure you're not my ex-husband? How's the new, younger wife?

Don't worry. dear. I'm back with Lord now, so I won't burn in hell and make you look bad. I will spend the rest of my days as a bitter, ugly hag on a limited income. God couldn't let me off for my years of straying without some punishment.

Discardedly Yours,

Handmaiden

Wow, so much anger and bitterness. I knew there was something back there. So do you think that pretending to be something out of a John Norman novel is actually going to get you somewhere on this board?

[handmaiden]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

Wow, so much anger and bitterness. I knew there was something back there. So do you think that pretending to be something out of a John Norman novel is actually going to get you somewhere on this board?

Now, Brother Campbell, I am neither bitter nor am I angry. I am filled with joy because I KNOW that I do not deserve a husband. God's mercy in leadin' me to LBC after all them yers of readin' and rebellin' is all I could possibly want in my life. And I don't know about any John Norman , butI am certain that ain't soundin' like somethin' out of his book. In fact, I have been watcin' too many episodes of Firefly.

And I will flat out tell you two things jes' as soon as I can dig myself out of this accent. I am no more sarcastic than anyone else here. I am, however, very ironic when I say that my ex is better off without me and that I made mistakes and I do deserve to be alone.

Candorly Yours,

Handmaiden

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

I will spend the rest of my days as a bitter, ugly hag on a limited income.

Now, Brother Campbell, I am neither bitter nor am I angry.

You have some serious issues "lady". Your mood swings faster than Obama is destroying America. Stop pretending and start studying that KJV1611 Holy Bible, otherwise Hell will be where you end up.

[handmaiden]

Re: With Fear And Trembling . . .

You have some serious issues "lady". Your mood swings faster than Obama is destroying America. Stop pretending and start studying that KJV1611 Holy Bible, otherwise Hell will be where you end up.

Thank you so much for correcting my discrepancies, Brother.

Allow me to clarify. I believe that I deserve to be a bitter hag because I am ugly and did, indeed, sin by questioning my husband and going off on a journey of doubt and discovery.

I actually, absolutely am NOT bitter towards my ex. It is he who was wronged through my actions. And he does deserve to share his life with a devoted wife.

If need be, I will work on becoming more bitter if that helps in anyway.

Redactfully Yours,

Handmaiden