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  • Hi

    Hello, allow me to humbly introduce myself. I am Christopher, a former sinner.

    I have recently (in the last 4 months) begun attending St Barnabus Church in England, under my noble Vicar George Day.

    I was once blind; a man who cared little for religion but who never believed the rubbish spouted to me by so called "teachers" about evolution. Fish turned into frogs, frogs turned into monkeys, monkeys turne... GIVE ME A BREAK. I decided to forget it all, I believed in nothing, I had no faith.

    Until I found The Bible. I was annoyed that a "woman" I knew from work attempted to disagree with my idea regarding efficiency- she was kissing her "girlfriend" during working hours (which I found physically revolting) who I requested leave the premises immediately (enough of this story, lets just say my meditation helped me remain calm and respectful). Frustrated, I left work and searched the internet for help- I knew she was in the wrong and me the right, but had nothing to help me. Then I found Christianity.

    As a new Christian, I know only the most basic scripture - although I study the Bible everyday, desperately trying to make up for my sins in my earlier life to appease the Lord. I promise you that if my brain is not quite in the right place yet, my heart truly is.

    "Trust in the LORD with all thine heart;
    and lean not unto thine own understanding.
    In all thy ways acknowledge him,
    and he shall direct thy paths." Proverbs (I do not remember the exact reference but I will rectify this immediately when I finish work)
    Thank you, God bless.
    6
    A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
    "But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"

    Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
    If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.

    GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.

  • #2
    Re: Hi

    Welcome to God's favorite forum.

    What denomination is St. Barnabus Church? I hope you're not a papist. They aren't even Christians.

    Which Bible version do you use?
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Hi

      Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
      Welcome to God's favorite forum.

      What denomination is St. Barnabus Church? I hope you're not a papist. They aren't even Christians.

      Which Bible version do you use?
      Thank you, and apologies - I was practising Yoga.

      The church is Anglican (COE).
      (http://www.joydenswoodchurch.webeden.co.uk/)

      And the only Bible I have every owned is King James. I know not whether this is good or bad.
      6
      A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
      "But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"

      Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
      If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.

      GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Hi

        Originally posted by WinnerNotSinner View Post
        I was practising Yoga.
        Be careful. I hear Yoga is a form of sexual deviancy.
        The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Hi

          Originally posted by Billy Bob Jenkins View Post
          Be careful. I hear Yoga is a form of sexual deviancy.
          I can assure you this is not the case. I can control my sexuality. Yoga is my way of reflecting on myself but mostly others wrongdoings.
          6
          A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
          "But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"

          Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
          If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.

          GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Hi

            Originally posted by WinnerNotSinner View Post
            Thank you, and apologies - I was practising Yoga.
            Yoga is a dothead form of worshiping demons. There is no quicker way to get possessed than doing the yoga that I know of.



            Originally posted by WinnerNotSinner View Post
            The church is Anglican (COE).
            (http://www.joydenswoodchurch.webeden.co.uk/)

            And the only Bible I have every owned is King James. I know not whether this is good or bad.
            So then you worship the queen. The C of E is a cult, and they are nothing but jumped up papists.

            Please tell me you're not a queer too. So many over there in Godless England are chinless queers.

            Anyway, you have a lot of repenting to do.
            Who Will Jesus Damn?

            Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

            Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

            Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Hi

              Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
              Please tell me you're not a queer too. So many over there in Godless England are chinless queers.
              Definitely not a queer, I have nothing in common with those Justin Bieber-loving sacks of shit.

              Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
              Anyway, you have a lot of repenting to do
              Lucky I found my way here then! Forgive me, I thought Yoga was a harmless past-time associated to no other religion, I will have to replace yoga time with double bible study time.

              About my local church, there are no other churches nearby - do you have any suggestions on what the best course of action is here. (I could drive a few miles but I don't know how much I am willing to spend on petrol). Maybe I could triple my bible study time and forget about church altogether?
              6
              A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
              "But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"

              Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
              If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.

              GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Hi

                Originally posted by WinnerNotSinner View Post
                About my local church, there are no other churches nearby - do you have any suggestions on what the best course of action is here. (I could drive a few miles but I don't know how much I am willing to spend on petrol). Maybe I could triple my bible study time and forget about church altogether?
                Where do you live?
                Who Will Jesus Damn?

                Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Hi

                  Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                  Where do you live?
                  Is compliance necessary? There may be (pathetic) trolls browsing these web forums.
                  6
                  A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
                  "But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"

                  Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
                  If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.

                  GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Hi

                    Hello Christopher!
                    2 Chronicles 7:14
                    14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land Australia.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Hi

                      Hello friend.
                      6
                      A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
                      "But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"

                      Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
                      If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.

                      GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Hi

                        He says he lives in England. How can there be no other churches around? England is covered with churches.
                        May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Hi

                          Originally posted by Nobar King View Post
                          He says he lives in England. How can there be no other churches around? England is covered with churches.
                          Sadly many have been knocked down. Not to worry, I have identified several true Christian Churches in the local area.

                          The Devil has obviously tried to stop me and confuse me along my journey into Heaven with false prophets, but I do not fear, I will submit myself to God whatever it takes.
                          6
                          A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
                          "But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"

                          Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
                          If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.

                          GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Hi

                            Originally posted by WinnerNotSinner View Post
                            Sadly many have been knocked down. Not to worry, I have identified several true Christian Churches in the local area.
                            Please tell me their names and I'll check them out for you. I'd hate for you to stumble into the wrong "church" and get sodomised.
                            Who Will Jesus Damn?

                            Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                            Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                            Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Hi

                              Welcome Christopher. I'm from Dover

                              Comment

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