[Jo Freddie]

Re: Hi

Excellent sir!

Now all we need is to know is the pelvic capacity of the young lady.

Oh My partner and I both feel on the subject of Children, been there done that, not doing it again.

[Sylvia]

Re: Hi

I realized I need to talk to a True Christian™ Pastor or Counselor ASAP~ Just so someone righteous gets to tell me who to talk to or not . It is a jungle out here

I am off to private messaging someone right now

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Hi

I realized I need to talk to a True Christian™ Pastor or Counselor ASAP~ Just so someone righteous gets to tell me who to talk to or not . It is a jungle out here

I am off to private messaging someone right now

You have a problem? Maybe I can be of assistance, I will talk a lot less mumbo jumbo then the pastors

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: Hi

I realized I need to talk to a True Christian™ Pastor or Counselor ASAP~ Just so someone righteous gets to tell me who to talk to or not . It is a jungle out here

I am off to private messaging someone right now

Sister,

If need be, I am open and willing to offer you private counsel and perhaps, if I cannot fulfill your needs, can point you in the correct and Godly direction.

YIC,

Sister Phebe.

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: Hi

I realized I need to talk to a True Christian™ Pastor or Counselor ASAP~ Just so someone righteous gets to tell me who to talk to or not . It is a jungle out here

I am off to private messaging someone right now

Sister Sylvia!

Please feel free to PM Sister Wintersnow or myself anytime. I can guide the Holy Spirit into you and Sister Phebe can advise in all womanly affairs. Trust me, she is a Godly woman!

Whatever you do, do not engage the Satanic Noodle cancer that we can't seem to remove from these Godly forums! He is the antiChrist in pasta form.

Yours in Christ!

[Sylvia]

Re: Hi

Sister,

If need be, I am open and willing to offer you private counsel and perhaps, if I cannot fulfill your needs, can point you in the correct and Godly direction.

YIC,

Sister Phebe.

God bless you, thanks for the offer! I will need all the help I can get, being I am fatherless, a widow and my local Pastor is very ill

[Sylvia]

Re: Hi

Sister Sylvia!

Please feel free to PM Sister Wintersnow or myself anytime. I can guide the Holy Spirit into you and Sister Phebe can advise in all womanly affairs. Trust me, she is a Godly woman!

Whatever you do, do not engage the Satanic Noodle cancer that we can't seem to remove from these Godly forums! He is the antiChrist in pasta form.

Yours in Christ!

Somehow I haven't noticed your post until now! Thank you very much.

Praise Jesus!

YIC

Sylvia

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Hi

Whatever you do, do not engage the Satanic Noodle cancer that we can't seem to remove from these Godly forums! He is the antiChrist in pasta form.

What are they so scared of?
That I might tell you the TRUTH?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Hi

What are they so scared of?
That I might tell you the TRUTH?

I'm afraid you wouldn't know the truth if it smacked you in the face like a wet noodle.

Once you wake up in the lake of fire and satan is raping you with his huge barbed tallywacker, THEN you'll know the truth.

Of course, it will be too late by then.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Hi

I'm afraid you wouldn't know the truth if it smacked you in the face like a wet noodle.

Once you wake up in the lake of fire and satan is raping you with his huge barbed tallywacker, THEN you'll know the truth.

Of course, it will be too late by then.

How many times do I have to over this with you Elohim cultists?
The One True God IS The Flying Spaghetti Monster.
There are no burning lakes of fire.
Why do you have such a preoccupation with a character from a fairy tale's sexual practices?

[Brother Snapper Grogan]

Re: Hi

Why do you have such a preoccupation with a character from a fairy tale's sexual practices?

You talk about fairy tales, yet you imagine that a plate of ground animal parts, extruded starch strings and pulverised fruit can suddenly come to life and achieve godhead? That sounds exactly like what the evolution liars believe!

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Hi

You talk about fairy tales, yet you imagine that a plate of ground animal parts, extruded starch strings and pulverised fruit can suddenly come to life and achieve godhead? That sounds exactly like what the evolution liars believe!

Read this very carefully....
We make a meal that bares a resemblance to The One True God because it pleases Him.
No one knows what The One True God is made of, but as He created the animals, the grain we get the starch from and the fruits we can be sure that is NOT what He is made of.


The Holy Noodle
The Olive Garden of Eden

That midget, however, was goddamn noisy. The FSM couldn’t deal with all the complaining down on earth, so the Lord FSM commanded the midget, saying, “Here’s an idea . . . why don’t you collect the semolina, rice and what-have-you, and make pasta in my image. That’s what it’s there for. And fill your mouth with it and be quiet and peaceful. But be careful with the olive tree, for the olive itself is good, but the pit inside is rock hard and you could choke on it or break a tooth, so you should consider it as evil; if you choke you shall surely die. Which would mean I wasted a hell of a lot of time on you, although I’m already having second thoughts.”

Man wasn’t excited about eating pasta seven nights a week, so the FSM broke down and brought him all the animal, and Man renamed each as a food group. Cattle he called “beef.” Pigs he called “pork,” “ham,” or “bacon.” Strangely, Man stuck with “chicken” for chicken. Perhaps Man was tired at this point and has lost his sense of creativity.

The FSM suggested that Man take a nap, so he did. When he awoke, the FSM said, “Man have I got a surprise for you. Check this out. Woman!”

The midget stared blankly for a moment, then said, “Can I keep her?” And the FSM said, “From now on a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh,” and the FSM thought to Himself, This should be interesting.

“I owe you one,” said the midget-man.

[Eeswaran]

Re: Hi

Read this very carefully....
We make a meal that bares a resemblance to The One True God because it pleases Him.

So you say God resembles a noodle?


Would you point me in the general direction where it says so in the scriptures?

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Hi

So you say God resembles a noodle?


Would you point me in the general direction where it says so in the scriptures?

The Holy Noodle (there is a clue in the name of the Holy Scripture)
The Third Day: Land and Vegetation

Then the FSM said, “Let the earth bring forth grass, semolina, rice, and whatever else can be turned into food that resembles my Noodly Appendages,”

Now if you are a member of a Elohim cult and have only read the KJV1611 or some other collection of the chasers fairy tales I can understand your confusion as these are not Holy Scripture.

You can find the TRUE Holy Scriptures in The Gospel of The Flying Spaghetti Monster and The Loose Canon, details of how to obtain these most Holt Scriptures can be found below in my signature.