Hello my fellow Christians

[Rev. J.E. Emosaggs]

Hello,
My name is Reverend Jerrard E. Emosaggs, VII, I am located in San Jose, California, attempting to convert the Gay Area to the light of Christianity.

I am a reverend at the Light of Christ Baptist Church here in San Jose.
For years, I've been struggling to keep people coming into my church,
many of my members are being corrupted by the Devil, turning them into
child-raping, atheistic, European homosexuals. Recently, a young Mexican
member of our church was trying to be saved for being of an inferior race,
all of a sudden, a large group of homosexual males came over to him and gave him a pat on the back and a wink. I quickly grabbed my Bible, ran up
to the leader of the homosexual group, and pressed it against his head.
He began to disintegrate and screamed loudly as he was experiencing the
light of Christ. The homosexuals were furious, and chased me back into my
church. Luckily, homosexuals cannot enter a church without experiencing
the wrath of God. I came to this site to seek the help of the clearly experienced Baptists of this community.

By the way, my favorite Bible verse is cliche, but very important to
my mission, Leviticus 18:22;
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.



Stay Christian, stay superior.

[Deaner]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

Hello,
My name is Reverend Jerrard E. Emosaggs, VII, I am located in San Jose, California, attempting to convert the Gay Area to the light of Christianity.

I am a reverend at the Light of Christ Baptist Church here in San Jose.
For years, I've been struggling to keep people coming into my church,
many of my members are being corrupted by the Devil, turning them into
child-raping, atheistic, European homosexuals. Recently, a young Mexican
member of our church was trying to be saved for being of an inferior race,
all of a sudden, a large group of homosexual males came over to him and gave him a pat on the back and a wink. I quickly grabbed my Bible, ran up
to the leader of the homosexual group, and pressed it against his head.
He began to disintegrate and screamed loudly as he was experiencing the
light of Christ. The homosexuals were furious, and chased me back into my
church. Luckily, homosexuals cannot enter a church without experiencing
the wrath of God. I came to this site to seek the help of the clearly experienced Baptists of this community.

By the way, my favorite Bible verse is cliche, but very important to
my mission, Leviticus 18:22;
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.



Stay Christian, stay superior.

Oh God; I just don't have the strength to deal with this. Anybody else?

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

Friend, the lesser races are not inferior. That would be racist. The statistics that prove all negros are rapists only illustrate a correlation between darkness and the stealing of pies. The truth is that these factors share a common socio-economic cause. See? It is economics. Not race. Poverty and ignorance are to blame.

[Rev. J.E. Emosaggs]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

Friend, the lesser races are not inferior. That would be racist. The statistics that prove all negros are rapists only illustrate a correlation between darkness and the stealing of pies. The truth is that these factors share a common socio-economic cause. See? It is economics. Not race. Poverty and ignorance are to blame.

As much as I'd like to believe this, it still begs the question:
if God was fond of these lesser races like he is fond of white people,
why would he give them poverty?
Obviously their poverty is punishment for their ancestral sins.
If you trace the origin of the Mexican race back far enough, you'd
discover that their ancestors were dirty, God-hating, druggie/hippies.

I'm unsure what the Landover Baptist Church teaches, but in my
church, we make sure all our members know that taking drugs
WILL spawn portals to hell, where the devil can physically interact
with the drug user. I've seen druggies and hippies turn darker skinned
over time. Ever wonder why Italians have been getting so dark?
They discovered Marijuana 500 years ago. God has been turning them
darker so that they are flagged for their ancestral sins.

[PraiseBlasphemy]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

Hello,
My name is Reverend Jerrard E. Emosaggs, VII, I am located in San Jose, California, attempting to convert the Gay Area to the light of Christianity.

I am a reverend at the Light of Christ Baptist Church here in San Jose.
For years, I've been struggling to keep people coming into my church,
many of my members are being corrupted by the Devil, turning them into
child-raping, atheistic, European homosexuals. Recently, a young Mexican
member of our church was trying to be saved for being of an inferior race,
all of a sudden, a large group of homosexual males came over to him and gave him a pat on the back and a wink. I quickly grabbed my Bible, ran up
to the leader of the homosexual group, and pressed it against his head.
He began to disintegrate and screamed loudly as he was experiencing the
light of Christ. The homosexuals were furious, and chased me back into my
church. Luckily, homosexuals cannot enter a church without experiencing
the wrath of God. I came to this site to seek the help of the clearly experienced Baptists of this community.

By the way, my favorite Bible verse is cliche, but very important to
my mission, Leviticus 18:22;
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.



Stay Christian, stay superior.

******1 Vote

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Disclaimer: YOU WILL BE OFFENDED


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You put facts in front of them and they either do not understand them or will ignore them.
They claim homosexuality is a choice yet don’t realize that if at any moment in your life, you had to choose between homosexuality and heterosexuality, you are neither. Instead you are bisexual.
They claim homosexuality is unnatural even though it occurs in nature. Its in the fu*king word you imbeciles. 1,500 animal species practice homosexuality
They claim marriage is a religious institution and again, they’re oblivious to the fact that they’re simply flat out wrong. Marriage has been around far longer than today’s religions, including Christianity. But it doesn’t matter if you tell them that because they’ll just keep regurgitating the same erroneous crap.
“I agree 100% wit this dude. All gays need to b killed. Hitler style. That sh*t ain’t normal.

fu*k anyone in this thread that supports gay marriage, you fu*king clowns.”

That is an actual comment from a religious nutcase in a topic regarding Kirk Cameron’s recent comments on gay marriage.
Debating them is a waste of time because they are stupid. They are so stupid that I can’t even think of a word to describe how stupid they really are.
They do not realize that their beliefs are entirely subjective and are essentially no different, in any way, than the beliefs of Ancient Greeks, or of the Aztecs, or the Mayans. Your religions are just modern versions of older ones. In time they will be GONE just like Zeus, Thor, Poseidon, Odin. Your beliefs are no fu*king different.
The evidence is against them and they have none to support their claims, but they still try to argue as if their beliefs are factual.
Just because your beliefs can’t be disproved means absolutely nothing. I can’t prove there isn’t an invisible dancing fairy behind me right now. Does that mean that there is an invisible dancing fairy behind me? I don’t even HAVE to disprove your fairy tales. The mere fact that you have zero evidence makes them negligible to me. Just think, would you take seriously the argument of a boy who tells you that there is a giant fucking singing evil invisible blob on the moon, but gives you no proof, or even the slightest bit of evidence? What if he then told you to disprove it? Would you even bother? Think about it. THAT’s HOW I FEEL… ABOUT YOU!
The absence of a rational explanation isn’t evidence of an irrational explanation.
They believe that the Earth is 6000 years old and that every species came into existence at the same time.
Crazy Christians believe that people who suffer in our modern world (for example, the Jews during the Holocaust) are being punished for sins they committed in a previous life.
They nit pick what parts of the bible to believe. That’s why there are Gay Christians. They only believe what they want, and they ignore all the horrible, disgusting and absurd shit.
They believe that the Earth was made before the Sun. Seriously. It says so right in the very first page of The Old Testament.
They actually believe that every thing in the bible literally happened. They believe that Jesus walked on water, and came back to life after having been dead for 3 days, that God killed everyone in a world wide flood and that he sent his own son to Earth to be tortured killed for our sins. He sent his own son to be killed. Re-read that. God set his own son up and had him wacked. Am I crazy? Am I the only person who thinks that may be a little bit extreme?
And finally, they believe that they are the smartest sentient beings in the entire universe. Why is that? Because they actually believe that they know for a fact, that God, an unknowable being for which there is no evidence, exists, and that they can SPEAK with him. If some being who we’d call God actually existed, it would be unfathomable. I’d hate to reduce such a collosal being to a bitter, child-like, Hitlerish Tyrant who interferes with measly human affairs, who picks sides and condemns his own children, whom he loves so much, to an eternity of suffering.
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[Rev. J.E. Emosaggs]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

"Praiserationality" (which is a VERY ironic name, considering what you just posted),

Please do not use copy and pasted arguments to try to
deny the truth. Homosexuality is a choice. Animals do
practice it, and they are lesser than humans (this is why
I don't own any animals, and eliminate any animals that invade
my yard on sight).

God is rationality. Satan has spread lies into your head.

If you wish to be saved, send me a private message,
and I will arrange a cheap Baptism and Bible study sessions
for you.


Leave your Satanic sinful ways behind.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

I'm unsure what the Landover Baptist Church teaches

Dear friend:

Landover Baptist Chuch teaches whatever the King James Bible teaches. We therefore ask you in Christian love to back up what you say with Scripture. Thank you, and have a blessed day.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

Hello,
My name is Reverend Jerrard E. Emosaggs, VII, I am located in San Jose, California, attempting to convert the Gay Area to the light of Christianity.

I am a reverend at the Light of Christ Baptist Church here in San Jose.

No, you're not.

I quickly grabbed my Bible, ran up
to the leader of the homosexual group, and pressed it against his head.
He began to disintegrate and screamed loudly as he was experiencing the
light of Christ. The homosexuals were furious, and chased me back into my
church. Luckily, homosexuals cannot enter a church without experiencing
the wrath of God.

Yes, that would explain Ted Haggard's routine reading from the Bible and preaching in church, in between bouts of crack-fueled receptive sodomy. And several hundred thousand Catholic priests.



Piss off, troll.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

As much as I'd like to believe this, it still begs the question:
if God was fond of these lesser races like he is fond of white people,
why would he give them poverty?
Obviously their poverty is punishment for their ancestral sins.
If you trace the origin of the Mexican race back far enough, you'd
discover that their ancestors were dirty, God-hating, druggie/hippies.

I'm unsure what the Landover Baptist Church teaches, but in my
church, we make sure all our members know that taking drugs
WILL spawn portals to hell, where the devil can physically interact
with the drug user. I've seen druggies and hippies turn darker skinned
over time. Ever wonder why Italians have been getting so dark?
They discovered Marijuana 500 years ago. God has been turning them
darker so that they are flagged for their ancestral sins.

Of course poverty and ignorance are imposed on the ignorant poor by God.

God smites his enemies with ignorance so that they will burn in Hell.

2 Thessalonians 2:11

King James Version (KJV)

11 And for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie:

He also answers prayer. So we know that the poor and ignorant have willfully refused to pray for wealth and proof of His existence.

Matthew 7:7

King James Version (KJV)

7 Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:

All of this history you have shared with us is interesting, but if it is not in the Bible, it is irrelevant to our Salvation. I hope you will consider God's literal word in the future.

[Yea-tho-we-walk]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

As much as I'd like to believe this, it still begs the question:
if God was fond of these lesser races like he is fond of white people,
why would he give them poverty?
Obviously their poverty is punishment for their ancestral sins.
If you trace the origin of the Mexican race back far enough, you'd
discover that their ancestors were dirty, God-hating, druggie/hippies.

I'm unsure what the Landover Baptist Church teaches, but in my
church, we make sure all our members know that taking drugs
WILL spawn portals to hell, where the devil can physically interact
with the drug user. I've seen druggies and hippies turn darker skinned
over time. Ever wonder why Italians have been getting so dark?
They discovered Marijuana 500 years ago. God has been turning them
darker so that they are flagged for their ancestral sins.

Rev Emosoggy, please, please don't use the term "white people" as it is very offensive to all the lessor races. In the future please use the term "normal people" instead as not to offend the cursed darker skinned posters that already have enough trouble like boils, herpes, head lice, and the such.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

Why is this idiot trying to make God sound like some sort of plot device in a Hammer Dracula movie?

The idea God stoops to cheap parlour tricks to smite gays when He perfectly invented the AIDS for a targeted smart plague is plain silly.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

Hello! I've started to realize that my life I have lived not have been the best ...... I have done many things that I regret and would like help to become a better person. I hope to live a sinless life and find peace in my rootless soul. What I like about you is that you seem so peaceful and calm. Is there hope for me to become a whole person? what do I begin? I find it extremely difficult to get to me all the information on your fantastic site. This, I hope to be my trip in a good and harmonious life. I have so much anxiety that I have to get rid of, do not know where to begin. / Benkt

Have you read the Bible?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Hello my fellow Christians

Have you read the Bible?

Looks like he's read it backwards.