Ex-Homer ready for a Godly marriage!

[William Taester]

Now that I have seen the light and been cleaned by some serious blood bathing, I am prepared to move on to what God has in store for me next!

Today after my prayer session, a young girl stumbled into my beauty salon and had a SASSY mouth on her. Before her father could smack the bejeezus out of her, I gave her a firm bop with the curling iron. Her father was so greatly pleased and appreciative...he immediately offered me her hand in marriage in exchange for my services bopping his own wife (since he is terribly arthritic). I had him bring her down to the salon and he told me of her back-sassing behaviour and how she needed a serious bopping to adjust her attitude (He would have done it himself, but his arthritis limits him) So I took her in the back room and bopped her privately multiple times. When I sent her out, her attitude was far more Godly than it had been in months, and the man made good on his promise.

So excited to be getting married and joining the Holy breeding folks !!!

[Mother Of Seven]

Re: Ex-Fag ready for a Godly marriage!

So are you going to offer your new found friends at LBC an invitation? I so love a good Christian wedding. It makes me cry

[William Taester]

Re: Ex-Fag ready for a Godly marriage!

So are you going to offer your new found friends at LBC an invitation? I so love a good Christian wedding. It makes me cry

INDEED!!!

However, I must only be married by the folks of Landover Baptist, lest I have a fake christian wedding that will never be blessed by

[William Taester]

Re: Ex-Fag ready for a Godly marriage!

The only thing is, that I actually wanted is other daughter (Rachael)! I will marry this one first (Leah) and wait until the honeymoon is over before I tell him that I want the other one. Perhaps he will hire me again to bop his wife once more and reward me with the daughter that I actually want...for this is the will of God.

[Morton Weinstein]

Re: Ex-Fag ready for a Godly marriage!

So tell me of this Rachael, Brother! Share the wealth with a newly baptized follower of JESUS! (See my ad in Christian Singles)

You can't have all the nice ladies! Be a bro!

Morton

[William Taester]

Re: Ex-Fag ready for a Godly marriage!

So tell me of this Rachael, Brother! Share the wealth with a newly baptized follower of JESUS! (See my ad in Christian Singles)

You can't have all the nice ladies! Be a bro!

Morton

Rachael? He's pretty cool, I guess. What all would you like to know?

[Basilissa]

Re: Ex-Fag ready for a Godly marriage!

Rachael? He's pretty cool, I guess. What all would you like to know?

You mean, "she," right? I hope this is just an innocent mistake, and not some Freudian slip of the tongue!

[Freddy Osborne]

Re: Ex-Fag ready for a Godly marriage!

So tell me of this Rachael, Brother! Share the wealth with a newly baptized follower of JESUS! (See my ad in Christian Singles)

You can't have all the nice ladies! Be a bro!

Morton

It appears Rachael is a bro...

[William Taester]

Re: Ex-Fag ready for a Godly marriage!

You mean, "she," right? I hope this is just an innocent mistake, and not some Freudian slip of the tongue!

Ummm...It's a typo, of course...tongue slipping is for those Satanic Lezbos!

Rachael is the perfect match for you, Morton. She is a Godly young woman who has not yet known a man (so your inadequacy shouldn't be an issue cause she won't know the difference) and she dresses in cheap clothes as required by 1 Timothy 2:9 ...so you should really love that about her!

All in all I'd have to say she is a rib who knows her place.

The problem you will encounter will be with her (earthly) father. This is his favorite daughter and he doesn't appear to be in a hurry to get rid of her. Perhaps you can get together and work something out