What to wear while watching Donald Trump's recommended pornography?

[Sally Paulson]

What does a proper lady wear to a pornographic-movie marathon at a church? (I think these used to be called "Stag parties"? Do those still happen? Are they still called that? And what does a lady wear to them?)

Don't get me wrong - I really want to do what President Trump told us to do - to watch a sextape that allegedly exists, in which his Miss Universe catfight rival does something disgusting. It's just that, well, this is all so new.



It would be easiest if we could get some agreement over just what video is the sextape in question. Watching them all is just too much. I just don't have the time to watch Big Booty Housekeepers #8, Mr. Buttfiend goes to Argentina, and Tight As A Chihuahua #2 in one sitting.

Also, where are we to do the watching? Are we watching it in church? A friend says Tight As A Chihuahua #2 is missing a soundtrack, so the organist could give it the silent-movie treatment...Again, it just feels so strange, like I don't know the Republican party any more. If only it had happened slower...Say, one election we tolerate a New Yorker, the next election we tolerate someone who was involved in gambling...I knew at some point a Republican presidential nominee would urge us to watch pornography, I just didn't expect it to happen so soon.

I hope I don't sound too critical. I think Donald Trump will do a great job representing women, or at least the 12-year old girls who he learned his debating tactics from. "You're a fat slut and I hope everyone watches your sextape" will be a devastating negotiation tactic when he's getting Angela Mercel to go along with his planned break-up of NATO. After all, who needs NATO when we are defended by as skilled a catfighter as Donald Trump?

[Basilissa]

Re: What to wear while watching Donald Trump's recommended pornography?

Wait, the way Brother Larry explained this to me, was that this special screening of Trump recommended porn movies (including the one he's starring in) was an event open exclusively to True Christian™ Men, no women and children allowed?

Or did I miss something?

No one ever ells me anything.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Sister Sarah is a swell dresser

I'm a big fan of Sister Palin (bless her heart). I always try to dress "Sarah" style. She has impeccable taste in clothes. Since it is a "marathon" I think I would wear a casual - yet classy- jogger from Boston Proper. I think it would be very appropriate.

[Michael Hezekiah Esq]

Re: What to wear while watching Donald Trump's recommended pornography?

So - have the women in Freehold and others who frequent this site ever had psychiatric evaluations?


I see more Stepford every time I visit the forum.


I've offered before to help you leave. No need to fear husbands and fathers; I can have the National Guard there in moments if need be.


The idiotic Donald Trump is not suggesting that you actually view a tape contrary to the purity G_d commands. He was simply using political rhetoric. Instead why not go out for a drink and dance the night away? Eat, drink, and be merry!


And for the love of all that is good and holy, don't pattern yourselves after that ditzy Sarah Palin.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: What to wear while watching Donald Trump's recommended pornography?

Wait, the way Brother Larry explained this to me, was that this special screening of Trump recommended porn movies (including the one he's starring in) was an event open exclusively to True Christian™ Men, no women and children allowed?

Or did I miss something?

No one ever ells me anything.

Sister Basilissa,


I love a female who listens when a man speaks. It's a rare quality these days, and you've made me very proud. If it weren't for my commitment to medicine, psychoanalysis, and creation science, I just might be approaching your father for a blessing in preparation for courtship and wooing.


The screenings are indeed restricted to the males. However, a certain number of women have been asked to provide snacks and foot massages while the films are viewed. If you were chosen for that, you will be notified prior to the event. I hope you are one of the elect who will be honored to serve.


Have you made plans for the Witch Hunt, Basilissa Dear? I have an AR 15 you can borrow if it isn't being used in Houston.


Um, there's a gun show there that I might attend this month. That's what I meant. As a certified equine gnathologist, future vet, future equine psychoanalyst, and future PhD in Creation Science, I think it's important to maintain my assassination - er, sharpshooter - skills.


Affectionately,
Brother Larry

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

Re: What to wear while watching Donald Trump's recommended pornography?

Or did I miss something?

Donald Trump knows that women and children read his twitter feed. We are loyal Republicans. We support our nominee.

Why does everybody think they know better than the Republican Nominee? He is the best and the brightest of the best and the brightest that the Republican Party has to offer.

When we were impeaching Bill Clinton during the Monica crisis, we demanded that America know every detail. If there had been videotape, we would have urged everybody to watch it. America needs to know. This isn't some horrible invasion of privacy, like it would be if we were looking at Donald's tax returns.

So, as to sister Sally's question, I would suggest something slimming. And stay away from the popcorn. We don't tolerate Miss Piggies around here.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: What to wear while watching Donald Trump's recommended pornography?

I don't usually quote Urban Dictionary but can make one exception, having read some of the replies to your post.

PAGE 1 from uRbaN DICTIONARY

Check it out
Phrase from the 60s and 70s, meaning this is so cool, you have to look at it.

Check it out! Don't you wish you had one of those?

check it out
Look at this and think about it.

Check it out, this guy is totaly crazy.

Check it out
Basically just means "listen".

Check it out dude, here's what we'll do:

Check it out
Investigate; examine closely with the intention of reporting back the information gathered. Also "to check something out" Much like "scope it out."

I'll stay here. Why don't you go and check it out.

Checkitout
Said as One Word , Also Said Very Fast . Refers to a Joke Telling Someone to Look at Something Disturbing .

"Checkitout!"
"Ew Man, That's Gross!"

I was particularly concerned about a remark from Michael Hezekiah,.Jew, commenting that Mr Trump never intended anyone to actually watch the thing

The idiotic Donald Trump is not suggesting that you actually view ..etc

I hope that is helpful.

PS - I don't think there's a dress code for events of the type you mentioned, it's much more The Emperor's New Clothes from what I've heard.

[Nobar King]

Re: What to wear while watching Donald Trump's recommended pornography?

I would wear something comfortable, maybe flannel with a button fly.

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: What to wear while watching Donald Trump's recommended pornography?

Alright, I've had about enough. Evidently it takes a pea-brained woman to think that The Donald should be taken seriously here. Trump was being facetious - meaning "joking or jesting", there is no way he meant anyone to actually go out and view a disgusting porn video of the BBW plus-size fat pig Alicia Machado. And I might add that if any of the men here are into that 48G fetish stuff you need to get some help.

If anyone should be loosing some weight it's fat thighs pants suit Hillary Clinton - it's no wonder Bill's eyes have been wandering all these years.

We need a moderator here to shut this thread down.

[Basilissa]

Re: What to wear while watching Donald Trump's recommended pornography?

The screenings are indeed restricted to the males. However, a certain number of women have been asked to provide snacks and foot massages while the films are viewed. If you were chosen for that, you will be notified prior to the event. I hope you are one of the elect who will be honored to serve.

I will impatiently await the invitation. Do you think Dr Niles will be there?

Have you made plans for the Witch Hunt, Basilissa Dear? I have an AR 15 you can borrow if it isn't being used in Houston.

I thank you for the offer. I'm sure that with this mighty weapon I will finally be able to shoot something that I'm actually aiming at. (Hint: any time you see me aiming with a gun, the safest place to avoid being accidentally shot is behind me).

I don't usually quote Urban Dictionary but can make one exception, having read some of the replies to your post.

PAGE 1 from uRbaN DICTIONARY

Check it out
Phrase from the 60s and 70s, meaning this is so cool, you have to look at it.

Check it out! Don't you wish you had one of those?

check it out
Look at this and think about it.

Check it out, this guy is totaly crazy.

Check it out
Basically just means "listen".

Check it out dude, here's what we'll do:

Check it out
Investigate; examine closely with the intention of reporting back the information gathered. Also "to check something out" Much like "scope it out."

I'll stay here. Why don't you go and check it out.

Checkitout
Said as One Word , Also Said Very Fast . Refers to a Joke Telling Someone to Look at Something Disturbing .

"Checkitout!"
"Ew Man, That's Gross!"

I was particularly concerned about a remark from Michael Hezekiah,.Jew, commenting that Mr Trump never intended anyone to actually watch the thing

I hope that is helpful.

This was very helpful indeed, Sister Mitza. May I also add that in context of a library or a movie rental place where you can check out videos, the meaning of checking out is even more obvious.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: What to wear while watching Donald Trump's recommended pornography?

I will impatiently await the invitation. Do you think Dr Niles will be there?

Why would you ask about him? I am sure if he is there he'd be too busy for any interaction with you. I would no doubt sit beside him so we could share manly fellowship and the occasional bro-hug, his muscular, sculpted shoulders pressing against mine as he grins that grin that just makes you know he's ... um, well - anyway, why would you ask about him?


Maybe you'd rather HE was there and not I. Well if that's how you want it, just say so instead of just alluding to it. I can take it.