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  • A man called me a polished turd.

    I was out shopping with my Pa and a man came up to me to tell me this. I asked my Pa why the man called me a polished turd. He proceeded to take the man out back (he never came out of the closet after that). What does that phrase actually mean? I can’t find “polished turd” anywhere in The Bible and it sounds very inappropriate.
    My name is Maxine Levantine. I am 17 and follow the KJV Bible to a T. If you are wanting to hit on me you can turn away. THIS is reserved for Jesus and my future husband (whoever that may be).

  • #2
    Re: A man called me a polished turd.

    If you are asking me to confirm if you are a polished turd, I cannot really answer. Not knowing you in person I don't know if you are shiny or not.
    God created fossils to test our faith.

    * * *

    My favorite LBC sermons:
    True Christians are Perfect!
    True Christian™ Love.
    Salvation™ made Easy!
    You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe the Old Testament.
    Jesus is impolite. Deal with it.
    Jesus is xenophobic and so should we.
    Sanctity of Life is NOT a Biblical Concept.
    Biblical view on modern-day slavery.
    The Immorality of the "Universal Declaration of Human Rights."
    Geneva Conventions vs. The Holy Bible.
    God HATES Rational Thinking!
    True Christian™ Man as a spitting image of God.

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    • #3
      Re: A man called me a polished turd.

      I have never heard of anyone being called a polished turd. My husband says there is a crude expression which says "you can't polish a turd", which (a) is blindingly obvious and (b) indicates that calling someone a polished turd is just nonsense.

      I think that perhaps someone needs to stop all this tedious attention-seeking, accept that she is probably un-polishable and get on with her life.
      Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: A man called me a polished turd.

        Originally posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
        I have never heard of anyone being called a polished turd.
        Mythbusters did an episode on just this thing, which just goes to show you scientists are all Sodomites obsessed with excretion from the rectum, and the rectum itself. So sad. Those boys need Christ.
        Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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        • #5
          Re: A man called me a polished turd.

          Originally posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
          Mythbusters did an episode on just this thing, which just goes to show you scientists are all Sodomites obsessed with excretion from the rectum, and the rectum itself. So sad. Those boys need Christ.
          Thank you, Sister Mary. Whoever Mythbusters are, and I have never heard of them (we lead a sheltered life here), they seem to have been sucked into today's obsession with proving the obvious. It is a tragedy that doing so feeds into their personal anal perversions.
          Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: A man called me a polished turd.

            My Poor Darling Sister Max,


            How cruel that you've been insulted in this way. Let me explain. Suppose there is a hog shopping for groceries and all of a sudden that hog defecates all over your new patent leather shoes that Pa just bought from the Sears catalog ten years ago. The shoes could be cleaned, but under that shine is just a pair of shoes with microscopic pig defecation. It isn't truly clean.


            That's you, kind of. I hope this helps and brings a blessing to your day. Rejoice in JESUS! He adores you!


            BrotherLarry
            Revelation 22:12
            Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
            “The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

            Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
            Amen and Amen

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: A man called me a polished turd.

              Originally posted by The Attention Seeker Jen
              I think it's a reference to Polish sausage, in this case, comparing the tubular shape of the kabassa to a turd. Polish people also get a bad rep for being gassy and having an unpleasant demeanor. Being a quarter polish on my mother's side, I can attest this isn't true one bit.
              As is the case with your posts on the forums here, you're wrong. I've heard a similar expression before and Brother Larry's explanation is on point with the expression's meaning. As to why anyone would use such a vulgar expression to describe Sister Maxine, I couldn't say.
              And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
              Deuteronomy 6.5

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              • #8
                Re: A man called me a polished turd.

                Bless you, Esther. Surely God has given you a sweet sweet spirit.
                Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
                “The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

                Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
                Amen and Amen

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: A man called me a polished turd.

                  Originally posted by The Attention Seeker Jen
                  I think it's a reference to Polish sausage, in this case, comparing the tubular shape of the kabassa to a turd. Polish people also get a bad rep for being gassy and having an unpleasant demeanor. Being a quarter polish on my mother's side, I can attest this isn't true one bit.
                  Is there literally nothing that doesn't trigger gluttony in your mind? Even the subject of a turd stokes your lust for food. Young lady, pray to Jesus Christ with everything you've got to help you rein in your sinful cravings while the possibility of attracting a good, Christian man still exists and while you are still able to fulfill God's requirement that you give birth to more soldiers for Him. You need to be on your knees every night for Jesus so he can turn your cravings to the sustenance only He can give you. Let Jesus' love fill you as if He were your husband and maybe, just maybe, you can get yourself into a state where a healthy and functioning Christian man might be able to regard you as a worthy and fruitful wife. With Jesus inside you, anything is possible.

                  Ephesians 5: 22 Wiues, submit your selues vnto your own husbands, as vnto the Lord.

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