Happy Mothers' Day!

[Holly Graham]

Happy Mothers' Day to all my Sisters who are mothers.

Mr. Graham has allowed me to cook only THREE meals in celebration of me being a mother today! As he says, I'm not HIS mother, therefore I still have obligations to provide for him today. How silly women must be to forget that? (Colossians 3:18)

Mr. Graham has even allowed the girls to take the day off from helping me, since it's "Mother's Day," and they should be reading the Bible and learning about becoming a Godly mother. (Titus 2:4)

After I get to cook breakfast, lunch and dinner for the family, and wash all of the dishes and clothes (by hand of course), vacuum, and tidy the house, I will truly enjoy the freedom of reading God's Word, and reflecting on the joys of my 18 blessings (even if three of them are girls).

Motherhood, like God, is so GOOD.

[Mary Thompson]

Re: Happy Mothers' Day!

Happy Mothers' Day, to you, Mrs. Graham ! You're husband is very, very generous to let you relax on Mother's Day! Sadly, Mr. Thompson is still on his hunting trip and the boys at the relatives, so I spent Mothers' day alone . But when I was out shopping for food, I saw something awful, men running in PINK shirts and feminine wigs, it was a disgusting sight and God disaproves (Deuteronomy 22:5), I mean it's MOTHER'S DAY not SPIT ON JESUS DAY .
YIC
MT.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Happy Mothers' Day!

I'm sorry to have to come here to this horrible place, but I feel you are missing something.

In Matthew 12, we are shown the origins of Mothers’ Day.

We hear of how Jesus cured a man with a bad hand, and how He told the Pharisees what He thought of them. It is also in this chapter that Mary, wife of Joseph, mother to Christ, has a walk-on part:

Matthew 12:46 While he yet talked to the people, behold, his mother and his brethren stood without, desiring to speak with him.
Matthew 12:47 Then one said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with thee.
Matthew 12:48 But he answered and said unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my brethren?
Matthew 12:49 And he stretched forth his hand toward his disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren!
Matthew 12:50 For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother.

And what does Jesus do, straight after this? In Matthew:13, He goes off to speak in incomprehensible parables. i.e. He goes about his everyday affairs. (M't:13:13: Therefore speak I to them in parables: because they seeing see not; and hearing they hear not, neither do they understand.)

“So,” I hear women say “why does this mean that Matthew 12:46-50 is the start of Mothers’ Day?”

And I reply, “Dear Lord! Is your head so filled with air that you cannot work that one out for yourself? Do you have to be told everything? Can you work nothing out for yourself?!” And then I ask for forgiveness, for after all,

“1 Corinthians 14:35 And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home:”

Anyway, for the last time:

Matthew 12:46-50 is the start of Mothers’ Day because that is when a mother gets a mention. Just imagine how pleased I would be if there were a Bible verse that said,

“1:Bath:13:3 And Jesus spake unto Bathfire (who was called Ezekiel) and said,
1:Bath:13:4 “Why believest thou that thou art set about with idiots who ask questions that should be obvious?” And he replied,
1:Bath:13:5 Lord, is it that life is but a Vale of Tears and a shadow of the Glory to come?”
1:Bath:13:6 And Jesus took away the sore throat that Bathfire had and replied, “Verily I say unto you that your stabs in the dark at an answer do you credit! Blesséd are the weak in Spirit.”

You see, simply to get a mention in the Bible is almost the greatest honor; the greatest honor is that Jesus should be the one mentioning you!

(We know this because so few of the side-characters do get a mention, which makes checking up on names and thus learning more about miracles and things, is difficult, which is designed to make you have faith.)

I hope this helps.

[august]

Re: Happy Mothers' Day!

Happy Mother's Day to all here. My husband and children made breakfast in bed for me and are now starting a barbecue. I have some lovely flowers and cards. It is always a nice day for me.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Happy Mothers' Day!

I never understood mothers day. Jesus hated His mother. My father didn't even take a day of work when my own mother died. I am not even sure if he noticed she was gone, so dedicated was my father to pleasing Jesus Christ. I am certain I won't notice the difference if my own wife dies. She used to yap too much, but fortunately she stopped talking a few years ago.

[Sammy The Penitent]

Re: Happy Mothers' Day!

I never understood mothers day. Jesus hated His mother. My father didn't even take a day of work when my own mother died. I am not even sure if he noticed she was gone, so dedicated was my father to pleasing Jesus Christ. I am certain I won't notice the difference if my own wife dies. She used to yap too much, but fortunately she stopped talking a few years ago.

Dear Mr. Cranky,

Thank you for sharing Pastor Ezekiel's True Christian™ reminder of what a drunk, nagging woman Jesus' mother was.

On a personal note:

Thank you for sharing your own life's experiences with me. Your words of True Christian™ wisdom have personally helped me relate to my own experiences with the screechy, yapping women in my life, (Specifically, Mrs. Penitent and her mother) and how they will be judged by Our Lord.

1 Kings 3:16 Then came there two women, that were harlots, unto the king, and stood before him.

YIC