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  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78553

    #1

    Free Guns With Every House Sold!

    Now THIS is an idea who's time has come! I only wish Sister Marla Jennings had offered an incentive like this when I purchased my rolling estate. I'd have gotten a free arsenal!

    Real estate agent gives guns to homebuyers

    HOUSTON (Reuters) - A Texas real estate agent looking to add more bang to her business is offering clients a free Glock pistol if they buy a home from her.

    Julie Upton, a Houston-area real estate agent, spurned traditional buyer incentives like free gasoline cards or home improvement store gift certificates.

    Instead, she placed an advertisement offering a pistol with the purchase of any home worth at least $150,000 in the monthly publication, "Family Gun."

    "We thought it would be a good way to entice the right kind of people to buy in our community," Upton said. "And whether people want the gun or not, it has stirred up a lot of attention."

    Upton has given away twenty pistols to True Christians™ who purchased homes from her. The guns cost about $500 each.

    And so far the advertisement has not generated negative attention from the communist anti-gun lobby, she said.

    In Texas, no license is required to own a rifle, shotgun or handgun, but a permit is needed to carry a concealed weapon, according to the National Rifle Association.
    She'd better be careful there. $150,000 isn't much. My dog kennels cost more than $150,000. Even a nigra could afford that much, and we sure don't need any more armed nigras running around.

    Maybe we pastors should consider a program like this for saving souls. Those free Play station 3's have gotten pretty spendy. The kids might appreciate a Glock more than some mindless game console....And Praise Jesus they are attractive.
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
  • Brother Temperance
    Senior Usher
    True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
    A very nice young man
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 15621

    #2
    Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
    She'd better be careful there. $150,000 isn't much. My dog kennels cost more than $150,000. Even a nigra could afford that much, and we sure don't need any more armed nigras running around.

    We don't need any more unsaved hellbound scum like that running around with guns, either:
    Leviticus 19:28 Ye shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor print any marks upon you: I am the LORD.
    O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



    God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

    Comment

    • Elmer Christianson
      True Christian™
      True Christian™
      • Oct 2006
      • 133

      #3
      Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

      Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
      Now THIS is an idea who's time has come! I only wish Sister Marla Jennings had offered an incentive like this when I purchased my rolling estate. I'd have gotten a free arsenal!



      She'd better be careful there. $150,000 isn't much. My dog kennels cost more than $150,000. Even a nigra could afford that much, and we sure don't need any more armed nigras running around.

      Maybe we pastors should consider a program like this for saving souls. Those free Play station 3's have gotten pretty spendy. The kids might appreciate a Glock more than some mindless game console....And Praise Jesus they are attractive.
      Brother Zeke, are there any more pictures of that gun? Maybe a little more vertical and less horizontal?
      Investment Portfolio = Canned Goods, Automatic Weapons and a KJV1611 Bible!

      Comment

      • Pastor Ezekiel
        Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
         
        • Sep 2006
        • 78553

        #4
        Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

        Originally posted by Elmer Christianson View Post
        Brother Zeke, are there any more pictures of that gun? Maybe a little more vertical and less horizontal?
        Sorry, but that's the only one I found. I think its the real estate agent posing with the glock she's giving away...What a mouth watering offer!
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

        • Jesus is Lord
          Devout seeker of the Truth™
          True Christian™
          • Sep 2006
          • 639

          #5
          Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

          Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
          Sorry, but that's the only one I found. I think its the real estate agent posing with the glock she's giving away...What a mouth watering offer!
          If it is then she is not only breaking Leviticus 19:28 with that piercing she is also breaking Deuteronomy 22:4-6 by wearing jeans, which are men's clothing. She is also very close to showing off her upper unmentionables like a tramp.

          Deuteronomy 22:4-6: The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the LORD thy God.
          The Big-Bang: GOD spoke and, BANG, the universe was formed.
          Genesis 1:1 - In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
          sigpic

          Comment

          • Brother V
            True Christian™ Nitric Oxide
            True Christian™
            • Sep 2006
            • 3481

            #6
            Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

            Originally posted by Jesus is Lord View Post
            If it is then she is not only breaking Leviticus 19:28 with that piercing she is also breaking Deuteronomy 22:4-6 by wearing jeans, which are men's clothing. She is also very close to showing off her upper unmentionables like a tramp.

            Deuteronomy 22:4-6: The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the LORD thy God.
            While trousers are generally considered male attire. I don't see how any man could wear those pants. The crotch area is much too tight. While it might be fun to get into those jeans, I don't think I could do it.

            You know... because of my ... er... condition.

            Go Jesus

            YIC
            V
            Judges 9:21 And Jotham ran away, and fled, and went to Beer, and dwelt there, for fear of Abimelech his brother.

            Comment

            • Jesus is Lord
              Devout seeker of the Truth™
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 639

              #7
              Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

              Originally posted by Brother V View Post
              While trousers are generally considered male attire. I don't see how any man could wear those pants. The crotch area is much too tight. While it might be fun to get into those jeans, I don't think I could do it.

              You know... because of my ... er... condition.

              Go Jesus

              YIC
              V
              Those particular pants may not be designed for men to wear as it was probably designed by some feminazi. Pants of almost any kind are male attire, women should only wear skirts. The belt she is wearing also looks quite male, it lloks like the kind of belt a father would wear, the kind he would use to discipline his children.
              The Big-Bang: GOD spoke and, BANG, the universe was formed.
              Genesis 1:1 - In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
              sigpic

              Comment

              • Brother V
                True Christian™ Nitric Oxide
                True Christian™
                • Sep 2006
                • 3481

                #8
                Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

                Originally posted by Jesus is Lord View Post
                Those particular pants may not be designed for men to wear as it was probably designed by some feminazi. Pants of almost any kind are male attire, women should only wear skirts. The belt she is wearing also looks quite male, it lloks like the kind of belt a father would wear, the kind he would use to discipline his children.
                Brother, I've prayed over this many many times. "That which pertaineth unto a man" is one of those verses that can be read many ways. In my opinion, this verse means solely man's clothing. Not clothing designed to simulate men's clothing.

                If you look further in the verse, you see this "neither shall a man put on a woman's garment". Does this mean men cannot wear a robe (like a dress)? Didn't Jesus wear a robe? Does this mean men cannot wear a skirt? A kilt is a skirt and there are very few things more masculine than a man in a kilt.

                Friend, it is acceptable for women to wear trousers, so long as they are purchased in the women's department of the store.

                It is not acceptable for a girlfriend to sleep in one of your shirts, nor can she tramp around in boxer shorts. Women's attire must be purchased in the women's department, just as men's in the men's. Anything that is uni-sex should be burned and stores that sell uni-sex attire should be firebombed.

                In my opinion, women may wear trousers and not be committing a sin. Men may wear a kilt and not be committing a sin. It's all in the cut of the fabric, as to if a sin is committed.

                I know this may cause some discourse and dialague between the bretheren, but that's what we're here for.

                Go Jesus!!!

                YIC
                V
                Judges 9:21 And Jotham ran away, and fled, and went to Beer, and dwelt there, for fear of Abimelech his brother.

                Comment

                • Jesus is Lord
                  Devout seeker of the Truth™
                  True Christian™
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 639

                  #9
                  Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

                  Originally posted by Brother V View Post
                  Brother, I've prayed over this many many times. "That which pertaineth unto a man" is one of those verses that can be read many ways. In my opinion, this verse means solely man's clothing. Not clothing designed to simulate men's clothing.

                  If you look further in the verse, you see this "neither shall a man put on a woman's garment". Does this mean men cannot wear a robe (like a dress)? Didn't Jesus wear a robe? Does this mean men cannot wear a skirt? A kilt is a skirt and there are very few things more masculine than a man in a kilt.

                  Friend, it is acceptable for women to wear trousers, so long as they are purchased in the women's department of the store.

                  It is not acceptable for a girlfriend to sleep in one of your shirts, nor can she tramp around in boxer shorts. Women's attire must be purchased in the women's department, just as men's in the men's. Anything that is uni-sex should be burned and stores that sell uni-sex attire should be firebombed.

                  In my opinion, women may wear trousers and not be committing a sin. Men may wear a kilt and not be committing a sin. It's all in the cut of the fabric, as to if a sin is committed.

                  I know this may cause some discourse and dialague between the bretheren, but that's what we're here for.

                  Go Jesus!!!

                  YIC
                  V
                  Thank you for your wise words, Brother. I understand better now what men and women can and can't wear.

                  Praise Jesus!

                  YIC,
                  Jesus is Lord
                  The Big-Bang: GOD spoke and, BANG, the universe was formed.
                  Genesis 1:1 - In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
                  sigpic

                  Comment

                  • Pastor Al E Pistle
                    Christ's Cōnsiliārius
                     
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 9323

                    #10
                    Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

                    I can also recommend the Fobus(R) holster the young man is wearing.
                    Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
                    "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
                    Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


                    Comment

                    • Bobby-Joe
                      Landover Security Superviser
                      Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert
                      NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
                      True Christian™
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 18405

                      #11
                      Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

                      Originally posted by Brother V View Post
                      While trousers are generally considered male attire. I don't see how any man could wear those pants. The crotch area is much too tight. While it might be fun to get into those jeans, I don't think I could do it.

                      You know... because of my ... er... condition.

                      Go Jesus

                      YIC
                      V
                      Poor Brother V. I though you brought up your condition to the Landover Christian Benevolence Committee, did they turn you down again V?

                      Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

                      Hot Must ReadThreads!


                      Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

                      Comment

                      • Brother V
                        True Christian™ Nitric Oxide
                        True Christian™
                        • Sep 2006
                        • 3481

                        #12
                        Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

                        Originally posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
                        Poor Brother V. I though you brought up your condition to the Landover Christian Benevolence Committee, did they turn you down again V?
                        Ezekiel 23:20 For she doted upon their paramours, whose flesh is as the flesh of asses, and whose issue is like the issue of horses.

                        Alas, thus is the burden I have to bear and bear alone. I have no Simon... or simone either.

                        Mark 15:21 And they compel one Simon a Cyrenian, who passed by, coming out of the country, the father of Alexander and Rufus, to bear his cross.

                        Due to my condition, I've become like Paul.

                        1 Corinthians 7:7 For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.

                        YIC
                        V
                        Judges 9:21 And Jotham ran away, and fled, and went to Beer, and dwelt there, for fear of Abimelech his brother.

                        Comment

                        • Pastor Ezekiel
                          Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                           
                          • Sep 2006
                          • 78553

                          #13
                          Re: Free Guns With Every House Sold!

                          I wonder if this deal is still on?
                          Who Will Jesus Damn?

                          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                          Comment

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