Still alone, my heart needs a companion

[Meek and Humble]

Another summer withers away, and still my soul has found no mate. I fear that at my age (20) am I nearing spinsterhood. I am but a simple farmer, who loves his God, but I have within my the burning soul of a poet, and a heart craving romance.

I have had my hopes dashed so many times in the past. My heart was stomped on by a certain Canadian witch who shall remain nameless (wicked though she is). I was enamored by her looks, but she would not convert for me.

Then I thought I had found love with a sweet girl from Russia named Bogdana Alkeav, who, although I did not understand a word she spoke, stole my affection. Alas, she stopped waiting for me to save up the money to immigrate here, and has since then sold herself as a mail-order bride.

Is there any woman out there who would like to be married, and soon? I need a beautiful woman to spend my life with.

Lord, I pray you help me find that special someone.

[InHisLove]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

I wish to stop by and say that I will keep you and your search in my prayers. I say that because a Man in such good standing with God deserves a woman to treat him like a man should be and to do has he pleases. I hope you find someone!

[Nurse Clampett]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

My heart goes out to you! I was recently widowed this past Spring and know what life is like without a weight around my neck mate. I would offer myself, but I'm thirty-five with six spawn and still cracking up mourning over my recent loss.
I do hope you find a good Christian wife. If you ever need any marital advice from a woman of experience, PM me and I'll be happy to instruct you in the ways of enticing a female.

YIC
Nurse Clampett

[Miss April]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

I'm so sorry Brother Heathen your still alone but so am i so i know how it feels i know i'm not a True Christian yet but whould you be Instersted in Someone Like me to have as your Wife? Because i whould love to Marry a Wonderful True Christian man like you i just love your Poetaster its So beautiful and amazing I know the Lord must be so pround of you and since i'm 19 now i want to Start to make soldiers for Our Great Lord Jesus People say i'm a very good Cook i love to Cook its one of my many Favorite things to do like Read the King James Which is my First favorite thing to do But I'm like you i love Jesus will all my heart I hope you accept my offer God bless you

[Larry Lee]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

Brother, I know just the girl for you. Her humble ways and shocking simplicity suggest a woman who would joyfully bake you pies and bear your True Christian(tm) soldiers. I think it's time for you to do some personal messaging.

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

Hmm...If I may offer my advice...

I think the problem is that Brother Heathen_Basher has been pursuing the wrong type of woman. First he lusts after a known wiccan with several psychological disorders. Then some unsaved commie harlot.

Surely, Brother Larry, setting him up with another unsaved girl like Jenni111 would be a recipe for disaster, would it not?

As Brother HB is a True Christian(tm), I would advise him to only seek a True Christian(tm) woman to be his baker of pies, bearer of children, keeper of the house, and faithful servant. We must heed the words of the Bible...

2nd Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?
2nd Corinthians 6:15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?
2nd Corinthians 6:16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
2nd Corinthians 6:17 Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you,

It is plainly obvious he must be matched with a True Christian(tm) woman! But that begs the question, which lady will do the honor of submitting herself unto Brother HB?

No doubt Brother HB is a Godly, strapping young lad. One just has to look at his avatar to realize he is the James Dean of True Christianity(tm)!

Here is the list of potential Future Mrs. Bashers....



Sister Talitha




Sister Virginia D. Templeton




Sister Mary O'Bryan Thorne




Sister JennyD

[Miss April]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

Hmm...If I may offer my advice...

I think the problem is that Brother Heathen_Basher has been pursuing the wrong type of woman. First he lusts after a known wiccan with several psychological disorders. Then some unsaved commie harlot.

Surely, Brother Larry, setting him up with another unsaved girl like Jenni111 would be a recipe for disaster, would it not?

As Brother HB is a True Christian™, I would advise him to only seek a True Christian™ woman to be his baker of pies, bearer of children, keeper of the house, and faithful servant. We must heed the words of the Bible...

2nd Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?
2nd Corinthians 6:15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?
2nd Corinthians 6:16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
2nd Corinthians 6:17 Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you,

It is plainly obvious he must be matched with a True Christian™ woman! But that begs the question, which lady will do the honor of submitting herself unto Brother HB?

No doubt Brother HB is a Godly, strapping young lad. One just has to look at his avatar to realize he is the James Dean of True Christianity™!

Here is the list of potential Future Mrs. Bashers....



Sister Talitha




Sister Virginia D. Templeton




Sister Mary O'Bryan Thorne




Sister JennyD

I think you are Right about everything Brother Rev.Jim i just wish i was a True Christian Because Brother heathen is the kind of True Christian man i'm Looking for but Oh well but i think Sister Talitha Whould be perfect for him don't you think?

[Talitha]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

Another summer withers away, and still my soul has found no mate. I fear that at my age (20) am I nearing spinsterhood. I am but a simple farmer, who loves his God, but I have within my the burning soul of a poet, and a heart craving romance.

STOP THERE!
What's this about being a "simple farmer?"

Before you all start getting carried away with this matchmaking let me remind you all of my position here.
My late husband (God rest his Soul) died very suddenly leaving me to fend for myself. Yes, there may have been several hundred million left to me but that's beside the point.
I now prefer my relationship to be with Jesus.

Brother Basher needs a good strong lady who can work the farm, give him lots of healthy Christian children and cook and clean for him.
Whilst the companionship of a (slightly) younger man is desirable I'm afraid I would have to decline this kind offer. I am far too busy with matters of the Church and partaking in my private Prayer sessions.

However, if Brother Basher ever feels the need to join me in prayer he is more than welcome to come over to my Mansion. My Prayer Closet is more than big enough for two.










.

[Larry Lee]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

STOP THERE!
However, if Brother Basher ever feels the need to join me in prayer he is more than welcome to come over to my Mansion. My Prayer Closet is more than big enough for two. :.

Now now sister, no need for such boasting. We know your prayer closet is a tight squeeze where people get to know each other very well.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

Well, in the mean time, I hope you know that you are a valued member at our Friday Night Young Men's Prayer Circle. You can come anytime.

[Meek and Humble]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

I'm so sorry Brother Heathen your still alone but so am i so i know how it feels i know i'm not a True Christian yet but whould you be Instersted in Someone Like me to have as your Wife? Because i whould love to Marry a Wonderful True Christian man like you i just love your Poetaster its So beautiful and amazing I know the Lord must be so pround of you and since i'm 19 now i want to Start to make soldiers for Our Great Lord Jesus People say i'm a very good Cook i love to Cook its one of my many Favorite things to do like Read the King James Which is my First favorite thing to do But I'm like you i love Jesus will all my heart I hope you accept my offer God bless you

Miss April, I am certainly flattered by your interest, and I have always thought you most becoming. Yet I wonder, I have seen you express similar interest to other men on these boards. Still, if you promise you have put such entanglements behind you, I wouldn't mind getting to know you a little better. Would your father be willing to chaperone for us on a date sometime?

[Meek and Humble]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

Brother, I know just the girl for you. Her humble ways and shocking simplicity suggest a woman who would joyfully bake you pies and bear your True Christian™ soldiers. I think it's time for you to do some personal messaging.

A Canadian? I dunno, I've had my heart broken by too many foreign gals already

She is pretty cute though...

[Meek and Humble]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

Hmm...If I may offer my advice...

I think the problem is that Brother Heathen_Basher has been pursuing the wrong type of woman. First he lusts after a known wiccan with several psychological disorders. Then some unsaved commie harlot.

Surely, Brother Larry, setting him up with another unsaved girl like Jenni111 would be a recipe for disaster, would it not?

As Brother HB is a True Christian™, I would advise him to only seek a True Christian™ woman to be his baker of pies, bearer of children, keeper of the house, and faithful servant. We must heed the words of the Bible...

2nd Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?
2nd Corinthians 6:15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?
2nd Corinthians 6:16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
2nd Corinthians 6:17 Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you,

It is plainly obvious he must be matched with a True Christian™ woman! But that begs the question, which lady will do the honor of submitting herself unto Brother HB?

No doubt Brother HB is a Godly, strapping young lad. One just has to look at his avatar to realize he is the James Dean of True Christianity™!

Here is the list of potential Future Mrs. Bashers....



Sister Talitha




Sister Virginia D. Templeton




Sister Mary O'Bryan Thorne




Sister JennyD

Thank you Reverend, but as Sister Talitha just said, she isn't interested. Sister Virginia I believe is married already, though I'm not sure. Sister Mary is, well, I believe past her child-bearing days. And Sister Jenny currently no longer resides in Freehold (hopefully she'll come back soon, though...)

[Meek and Humble]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

STOP THERE!
What's this about being a "simple farmer?"

Before you all start getting carried away with this matchmaking let me remind you all of my position here.
My late husband (God rest his Soul) died very suddenly leaving me to fend for myself. Yes, there may have been several hundred million left to me but that's beside the point.
I now prefer my relationship to be with Jesus.

Brother Basher needs a good strong lady who can work the farm, give him lots of healthy Christian children and cook and clean for him.
Whilst the companionship of a (slightly) younger man is desirable I'm afraid I would have to decline this kind offer. I am far too busy with matters of the Church and partaking in my private Prayer sessions.

However, if Brother Basher ever feels the need to join me in prayer he is more than welcome to come over to my Mansion. My Prayer Closet is more than big enough for two.










.

I think I'll take you up on that offer someday soon, Ma'am

[Meek and Humble]

Re: Still alone, my heart needs a companion

Well, in the mean time, I hope you know that you are a valued member at our Friday Night Young Men's Prayer Circle. You can come anytime.

Pastor, you know I'm always the first one to come.