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  • MyQueerDad
    Unsaved trash
     
    • Dec 2007
    • 50
    #31
    Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

    ha, haha, very funny... "fool"... wow... amazing

    jesus is deader than the wooden chair i'm sitting on right now

      Comment

      • JennyD
        Honorary True Christian™
        Sweet Placid Sister
        Forum Member
        • Dec 2007
        • 9567
        #32
        Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

        Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
        No need to fret, Ms. Seeker! As with all problems, JESUS provides a solution.
        Pastor, I think some demon-possessed goth hacker nerds have redirected your inspirational link (I think I fixed it)! It flashed on the screen for just a second, then switched to something about Satan's rotten-toothed fairy poodles, British werewolves!

        I averted my eyes once I realized what it was about.

        I had to look for about half an hour to find the right video. I do hope it's the right one!
        Originally posted by The Other View Post
        seems slighly ironic to be giveing away "free" games consoles when there are numerous topics around speaking of the troubles these machines cause =/

        also is this where peoples money that they donate to churches is ending up?
        The money donated to Landover goes to the Lord's work. What do you think is a better use of money, buying fancy catered dinners for homeless people who can't bother to work, who openly hate Jesus, and who attempt to predict the future using chicken gizzards and used syringes, feeding them for a single day, or to get the attention of a middle-class child being raised by liberal atheists, and save his soul for eternity?
        Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
        Nobody knows what you mean. You brain is addled with other men's seed and you're probably on the drugs as well.

        Time to get right with God, jennifer.
        But, Pastor . . . I hadn't even posted anything in this thread. What did I do wrong?
        www.palibandaily.com - Your Christian News Source
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          Comment

          • Pastor Ezekiel
            Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
             
            • Sep 2006
            • 78552
            #33
            Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

            Originally posted by JennyD View Post
            But, Pastor . . . I hadn't even posted anything in this thread. What did I do wrong?
            I was referring to the sodomite. They often have "drag names" and I was venturing a guess that this one called itself jennifer.

            I would never refer to you that way, Miss Jenny. Not a girl who bakes marionberry pie as good as you do....
            Who Will Jesus Damn?

            Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

            Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

            Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

              Comment

              • Davido
                Unsaved trash
                 
                • Dec 2007
                • 29
                #34
                Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                I was referring to the sodomite. They often have "drag names" and I was venturing a guess that this one called itself jennifer.

                I would never refer to you that way, Miss Jenny. Not a girl who bakes marionberry pie as good as you do....

                You are a very good looking man, pastor. Don't you have lot of queer bastards hitting on you?

                  Comment

                  • Pastor Ezekiel
                    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                     
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 78552
                    #35
                    Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                    Originally posted by Davido View Post
                    You are a very good looking man, pastor. Don't you have lot of queer bastards hitting on you?
                    I do indeed. With my rock hard abs (I swim 5 miles a day in my olympic-sized pool) and my natural good looks (blonde-haired and blue-eyed, just like Jesus!), I have innumerable queers wanting to commit sodomy on me. Being strong with Jesus, I am not tempted to indulge in that particular filthy sin.

                    I have hear it said that there are fan sites devoted to me on other forums, but I am too humble to check and see if that's true.

                    Praise Jesus!
                    Who Will Jesus Damn?

                    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                      Comment

                      • Davido
                        Unsaved trash
                         
                        • Dec 2007
                        • 29
                        #36
                        Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                        Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                        I do indeed. With my rock hard abs (I swim 5 miles a day in my olympic-sized pool) and my natural good looks (blonde-haired and blue-eyed, just like Jesus!), I have innumerable queers wanting to commit sodomy on me. Being strong with Jesus, I am not tempted to indulge in that particular filthy sin.

                        I have hear it said that there are fan sites devoted to me on other forums, but I am too humble to check and see if that's true.

                        Praise Jesus!

                        Would you have been tempted if you hadn't Jesus in your heart?

                        Why don't you put an end to those so calle fansites( or better: fagsites)? All they do is promote sin! Those fags abuse your image!

                          Comment

                          • silver_cougar
                            Unsaved trash
                            • Dec 2007
                            • 27
                            #37
                            Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                            Brethren, I am speechless. I only registered here a few minutes ago and posted in your introduction forum to say hi. Now that I have been looking around, I am stunned at what I am seeing. Giving away free video game systems to win people to Christ is materialism. Then people won't come to Christ for Christ, but because of the merchandise they can get.

                            Jesus condemned the Pharisees for making his Father's House a den of theives (See John 2:15-16). I'm afraid I can't encourage this at all.

                            In His Precious Name,

                            Roy
                            "By grace are ye saved through faith"
                            Ephesians 2:8

                              Comment

                              • Pastor Ezekiel
                                Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                                 
                                • Sep 2006
                                • 78552
                                #38
                                Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                                Originally posted by silver_cougar View Post
                                Brethren, I am speechless. I only registered here a few minutes ago and posted in your introduction forum to say hi. Now that I have been looking around, I am stunned at what I am seeing. Giving away free video game systems to win people to Christ is materialism. Then people won't come to Christ for Christ, but because of the merchandise they can get.

                                Jesus condemned the Pharisees for making his Father's House a den of theives (See John 2:15-16). I'm afraid I can't encourage this at all.

                                In His Precious Name,

                                Roy
                                Sir, there is no theivery going on here. We are a modern church trying to encourage young folks to discover Jesus. No harm is done, and souls are being saved.
                                Who Will Jesus Damn?

                                Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                                Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                                Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                                  Comment

                                  • Pastor Billy-Reuben
                                    Senior Pastor
                                    VP of Evangelical Outreach
                                    On FIRE for Jesus
                                    True Christian™
                                    • Sep 2006
                                    • 5812
                                    #39
                                    Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                                    Originally posted by silver_cougar View Post
                                    Giving away free video game systems to win people to Christ is materialism. Then people won't come to Christ for Christ, but because of the merchandise they can get.
                                    Would you object if we described our soup kitchen ministry, where we feed the homeless, provided that they are willing to listen to the Gospel message first?

                                    This is the same thing, only this ministry is designed to attract middle-class teens and young adults.

                                    Pastor Billy-Reuben
                                    Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.

                                    âśť This is a Christian community and we worship GOD of the Holy bible, the only Living GOD. We worship Jesus Christ, Son of GOD and Savior. Anything else is absurd. âśť
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                                    #ChristianLivesMatter

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                                      Comment

                                      • Brother Temperance
                                        Senior Usher
                                        True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
                                        A very nice young man
                                        True Christian™
                                        • Sep 2006
                                        • 15621
                                        #40
                                        Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                                        Originally posted by silver_cougar View Post
                                        Brethren, I am speechless. I only registered here a few minutes ago and posted in your introduction forum to say hi. Now that I have been looking around, I am stunned at what I am seeing. Giving away free video game systems to win people to Christ is materialism. Then people won't come to Christ for Christ, but because of the merchandise they can get.
                                        Friend, the object of the entire enterprise is to win people away from materialism. From a material perspective, giving away video game systems for nothing makes no logical sense. By behaving in this way, we provoke people into questioning what motivates us, and hopefully help lead them towards Jesus. Do you understand now?
                                        O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                                        God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                                          Comment

                                          • Daisy Mae Johnson
                                            The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                                            Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                                            aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                                            True Christian™
                                            • Sep 2006
                                            • 15708
                                            #41
                                            Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                                            Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                                            I do indeed. With my rock hard abs (I swim 5 miles a day in my olympic-sized pool) and my natural good looks (blonde-haired and blue-eyed, just like Jesus!), I have innumerable queers wanting to commit sodomy on me. Being strong with Jesus, I am not tempted to indulge in that particular filthy sin.

                                            I have hear it said that there are fan sites devoted to me on other forums, but I am too humble to check and see if that's true.

                                            Praise Jesus!

                                            Oh, there he goes being all humble and shy again.

                                            He indeed is a Hunk of Man on fire for the Lord!

                                            Here is a pic I snapped of him last summer while he was mucking out a stall on my property.

                                            Why, I bet even JESUS Himself envies Pastor Zeke's abs.

                                            GLORY!
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                                              Comment

                                              • imback
                                                Unsaved trash
                                                 
                                                • Dec 2007
                                                • 86
                                                #42
                                                Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                                                Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
                                                Oh, there he goes being all humble and shy again.

                                                He indeed is a Hunk of Man on fire for the Lord!

                                                Here is a pic I snapped of him last summer while he was mucking out a stall on my property.

                                                Why, I bet even JESUS Himself envies Pastor Zeke's abs.

                                                GLORY!
                                                That photo is fake.

                                                  Comment

                                                  • Pastor Ezekiel
                                                    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                                                     
                                                    • Sep 2006
                                                    • 78552
                                                    #43
                                                    Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                                                    Originally posted by imback View Post
                                                    That photo is fake.
                                                    Prove it, heathen. Sister Thumper is my fiancee. Are calling her a liar?

                                                    I was there when that picture was taken, so don't come in here bearing false witness.
                                                    Who Will Jesus Damn?

                                                    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                                                    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                                                    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                                                      Comment

                                                      • Jeb Stuart Thurmond
                                                        Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
                                                         
                                                        • Jun 2007
                                                        • 6572
                                                        #44
                                                        Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                                                        Originally posted by silver_cougar View Post
                                                        Brethren, I am speechless. I only registered here a few minutes ago and posted in your introduction forum to say hi. Now that I have been looking around, I am stunned at what I am seeing. Giving away free video game systems to win people to Christ is materialism. Then people won't come to Christ for Christ, but because of the merchandise they can get.

                                                        Jesus condemned the Pharisees for making his Father's House a den of theives (See John 2:15-16). I'm afraid I can't encourage this at all.

                                                        In His Precious Name,

                                                        Roy
                                                        Friend, now this is hate speech. Are you saying that "Prosperity Christianity" is equivalent to the theives who pillage New Orleans? Are you saying that the promise of Jesus to reward his followers a thousandfold is theivery?

                                                        The only reason people accept Christ is because he bribes them with heaven, a material reward. Heaven is a bribe. Are you calling Jesus a thief?
                                                        Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
                                                        Got Questions? See Frequently Asked Questions, or use Forum Search, tag system, or our guides on Geography, History, Science, Comparative Religion, Civics, and Current Events.
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                                                          Comment

                                                          • ILikeJesus
                                                            Confirmed Enemy of God
                                                            BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                                                            • Dec 2007
                                                            • 12
                                                            #45
                                                            Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3!

                                                            Waste of Bandwidth removed. -Wash O'Hanley

                                                              Comment

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