Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

I'm so upset right now!!! I was simply looking for some wholesome gifts for my little nieces and nephews when I came across these ABOMINATIONS on the Godless Internets!

WARNING!!!

Only scroll down if you have your KJV 1611 handy. And Ladies of Landover,

DO NOT VIEW UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES!

They call these pornographic dolls TEACHING TOOLS!!! To teach what? To teach our Christian children to have SEX, that's what!

And these are supposedly Teen Dolls!!! Isn't that illegal? What has happened to this country?!?

And these are CHILDREN!!! Hello, calling all pedophiles, buy these dolls to lure kids into your vans so you can rape them! I'm beside myself!!!

And look, a whole family NUDE TOGETHER!!! Hey kids, your bodies are beautiful, let's have an incestuous orgy! It's unfathomable that this stuff exists!

And while your at it kids, let's all imagine what Gramma and Grampa look like naked! Oh wait, we don't have to imagine it, BECAUSE WE HAVE THESE DISGUSTING DOLLS!!!

Fellow True Christians of Landover, we must draw a line in the sand here and now!!! A black President is one thing, but encouraging OUR Christian children into lives of underage, incestuous, multigenerational group sex is beyond the pale!!! We must take on the perverts that created these dolls by any means necessary. The very future of our nation is at stake.

[Nobar King]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

Most dollmakers provide clothes with their toys. What happened to this factory? Is it the economic slowdown?

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

What are they!!! Are they those dolls that the police keep in the Catlick Offenders’ File so the poor choir boys can point at the bits rather than have to soil their mouths?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

They look like those voodoo dolls the witchdoctors use to control people and make them do things hey would never, never do on their own only they can't help it, see, because they got cursed by a witchdoctor years ago and now he controls me and no amount of Prayer seems to change that and....

[Nobar King]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

Are they supposed to be instructional dolls?

"Look, kids, daddy's a beaner!"

I guess all the men have mustaches because they used the same pattern for both dolls. How else are you supposed to tell a man from a woman?

[Eugene Hackwith]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

What's stopping children from putting a brown skinned doll with a light skinned doll? Not only will those dolls teach children about dirty, shameful sex, but also about racial mixing.

Light skin goes with light skin, dark skin goes with dark skin, end of discussion!

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

We must mobilize, organize a mob group of concerned citizens and storm the gates express our views that this company should be burned to the ground stop making these dolls immediately!!!

[you people are nuts.]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

Omg you are stupid obviously these weren't made for children. Their probably adult prank gifts dumbshit.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

Omg you are stupid obviously these weren't made for children. Their probably adult prank gifts dumbshit.

Are you calling me stupid?!? You little unsaved piece of dog filth! I'll have you know I am very far from stupid.

These are teaching tools that SICKular LIEberals use to indoctrinate good, innocent Christian children into lives of sinful "body acceptance".

Children should be just as ashamed of their "down there" parts as we True Christian™ adults are! It's hellbound trash like you that are ruining America! I bet you voted for Obama!

[you people are nuts.]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

Are you calling me stupid?!? You little unsaved piece of dog filth! I'll have you know I am very far from stupid.

These are teaching tools that SICKular LIEberals use to indoctrinate good, innocent Christian children into lives of sinful "body acceptance".

Children should be just as ashamed of their "down there" parts as we True Christian™ adults are! It's hellbound trash like you that are ruining America! I bet you voted for Obama!

btw obama is dumb cuz he's raising shit loads of taxes and you shouldn't be ashamed of what god gave you cuz thats like so wrong.

[Nobar King]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

Did you think any of us voted to destroy our country with higher taxes and greater spending?? Do you think we're idiots?

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

btw obama is dumb cuz he's raising shit loads of taxes and you shouldn't be ashamed of what god gave you cuz thats like so wrong.

Well, at least you're on the right page as far as Obama is concerned! But you're wrong about shame son. It's in the Bible.

And please use proper grammar here. Jesus hates lazy people, and bad grammar is a sure sign of laziness!

[you people are nuts.]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

Neither Jesus or God hates anybody he loves all no matter what our defaults are

[Mollywhop]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

Ha, throw some baby clothes on those and there's your 'wholesome' gift.

Those are a little weird though.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Disgusting Dolls Teach Children to Sin!!!

Neither Jesus or God hates anybody he loves all no matter what our defaults are

Here is God talking about the shame of nakedness.

. . .Blessed is he that watcheth, and keepeth his garments, lest he walk naked, and they see his shame.
Revelation 16:15