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Question What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-21-2009, 12:34 PM

You know that song from "The Sound of Music" about "a few of my favorite things"? Maybe we could make a thread about that.

I'm kind of embarrassed that my favorite thing isn't a gun. It's these shoes on the right. Their real glory comes out when you look at what losers wear (on the left):



I'll do the first verse:

A few of God's favorite things


Mag-Lights and Baconaise,
AK-47,
Ham and Pork dishes that taste just like heaven...


#forevertrump: Supporter of The Donald as president-for-life! #MAGAlomaniac!
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-21-2009, 03:37 PM

Tidy front lawns and good little doggies,
Those two will show that you do love your neighbor,
Taking a nap on the porch in my swing,
These are a few of my favorite things.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-21-2009, 03:44 PM

Jesus God the ten commandments and Leviticus,


Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-21-2009, 03:55 PM

watching The Passion of the Christ - ESPECIALLY the whipping scene Oh Jesus, you love me ever so...
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-21-2009, 04:26 PM

I am being persecuted for my artistic vision. I'm a free verse poet damn it...

but anyway,

Not to mention Genesis, Isaiah, and Exodus
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-21-2009, 08:55 PM

I miss George W. Bush.

Cities in ruins and treasuries stolen
The poor floating face down and rich wallets swollen
Racism rising and vacation flings
These are a few of my favorite things

Creationist classrooms and buildings in ashes
Lobbyist windfalls and light sticks in asses
Torture and war while cash registers ring
These are a few of my favorite things

Headstones in graveyards and banners on coffins
Bright terror warnings and casualties often
Late empty gestures, the drowning it brings!
These are a few of my favorite things

When the polls drop
When the press stings
When I’m feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don’t feel so bad
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-21-2009, 09:00 PM

That was beautiful, brother H. You certainly have a way with words. It would be nice to hear that sung.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-21-2009, 11:04 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King View Post
That was beautiful, brother H. You certainly have a way with words. It would be nice to hear that sung.
I was really impressed with his verse, too! I actually was singing it. *Embarrassed*


If someone could tell me how, I could, y'know, record myself singing it and post it here... If, y'know, y'all would be, like, interested in that... 'Cause singing is something I really enjoy doing... And people seem to think I'm not so bad at it...


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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-21-2009, 11:08 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
I was really impressed with his verse, too! I actually was singing it. *Embarrassed*


If someone could tell me how, I could, y'know, record myself singing it and post it here... If, y'know, y'all would be, like, interested in that... 'Cause singing is something I really enjoy doing... And people seem to think I'm not so bad at it...
I would love to hear you. Especially the buildings in ashes and war thing.
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-21-2009, 11:26 PM

Stay away from Allie, she is not a lesbian like you!

Right?...
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-22-2009, 12:09 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
Stay away from Allie, she is not a lesbian like you!

Right?...
She's a witch, Brother Basher. They all play for both teams.



Anyway, to continue on with the topic of this thread, I recall the gala Landover event some years ago when that old prune beloved matriarch Mrs. Rogers sang her own version of that song at my father's retirement party. I still have the lyrics she sang.

Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Cadillacs and cataracts and hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.

When the pipes leak,
When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Back pains, confused brains, and no need for sinnin',
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',
And we won't mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.

When the joints ache,
When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-22-2009, 01:47 AM

I know this is not a contest, but I like Monty's version better.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-22-2009, 02:22 AM

Beaches and palm trees and tiny bikinis.
Tequila and tacos and lynched gringo weenies.
Cantinas with putas did I mention bikinis?
Warm nights and cold beer and hot chili beanies.
The last llines a stretch did I mention bikinis?


Wrestling with Demons.
Apostle at LARGE to the Heathen Latin Chicas.
LBCs Token compliance to NAFTA
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-22-2009, 02:27 AM

That's fantastic. How about another verse about fishing and smuggling wetbacks across the border? Then you can finish with something about corrupt Mexican politicians.


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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-22-2009, 04:17 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
If someone could tell me how, I could, y'know, record myself singing it and post it here... If, y'know, y'all would be, like, interested in that... 'Cause singing is something I really enjoy doing... And people seem to think I'm not so bad at it...
1. Get a microphone, if you don't have one.
2. MP3 files can be added as attachments

If you want to add instruments get the free trial of Accoustica Mixcraft for PC, or Garage Band for mac. You can also make it sound like you're in a concert hall, and even have people clapping at the end.
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-22-2009, 05:20 AM

Bullets and seal-clubs
and juicy mooseburgers,
rebuking a retard who calls it "Asperger's"
The Father, The Spirit, and the King of Kings,
These are a few of my favorite things

Glenn Beck and Limbaugh and Godly Dick Cheney
Seeing a beggar when it's cold and rainy
shiny gold crosses and abstinence rings
These are a few of my favorite things

Tea parties where people call for secession
Praying that Obama makes a depression
And once again all that abstinence bling
These are a few of my favorite things

When the queers hug
when the blacks breed
When I'm feeling mad,
I fire a few shots from my favorite things,
And then I don't feel so bad


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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-22-2009, 05:28 AM

Very nice, indeed. I see a potential trend here.


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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-22-2009, 05:42 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sixtha View Post
I would love to hear you. Especially the buildings in ashes and war thing.
Yeah, I found that all pretty amusing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
Stay away from Alie, she is not a lesbian like you!

Right?...
No, I'm not a lesbian.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond View Post
1. Get a microphone, if you don't have one. Check!
2. MP3 files can be added as attachments How?

If you want to add instruments get the free trial of Accoustica Mixcraft for PC, or Garage Band for mac. You can also make it sound like you're in a concert hall, and even have people clapping at the end.
Very cool, thanks for the info, Jeb. I'll see what I can do to make this happen.


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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-22-2009, 06:41 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fubar King View Post
That's fantastic. How about another verse about fishing and smuggling wetbacks across the border? Then you can finish with something about corrupt Mexican politicians.
Fat Federalies with gold teeth who watch ya,
Laughing when when by your sweet pink ass they gotch ya,
Jail cells with bedbugs and new sweaty freinds.
Wondering if this is how your life ends.
Chicken Beak Soup and water you cant drink.
Cant wash your face someone shit in the damn sink.
Huge cucaraches and spiders that bite.
Your brand new amigo says tonight is the night!
Walls that drip moisture and food that looks pre chewed.
No place to sit where someone has not spewed.
Saturday night brings a new load of drunks.
You can bet your last peso theyve been sleeping with skunks.
In the hot night.
When the drunks fight.
And your last feed
makes your ass bleed.
I think of Obama
in bed with your Mama
and then I dont feel
so baaaaaaad !


Wrestling with Demons.
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Last edited by Don Bozo el Guapo; 04-22-2009 at 06:48 PM. Reason: Boo Boos
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Default Re: What are a few of your favorite things? - 04-22-2009, 06:55 PM

Don Bozo! Don Chisteraro!

Did you enjoy those "putas" I sent you for Christmas?
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