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  • MARIO KART Turns Children into Gay Homosexuals!

    Recently, as I was setting up the Bible Quiz game in the Boys Only No-Homo™ prayer shed, I noticed that one of the boys had set up a nineteno wee game or whatever it is. Now, we already have a PrayStation™ Bible Console set up on the TV on VHF Channel 3, so I'm not opposed to educational games being played by the boys while they wait their turn to pray with a counselor in the worship closet inside the shed. But, when I turned on this game, I nearly came

    unglued!


    This game features what appears to be a rough italian tradesman scooting around a track like a bear in a prius (a known homosexual car). The object of the game is to shoot animals up other players' butts and watch them jump in the air and twirl around in ecstasy. They even let a GIRL drive!

    This Mario Kart game is just filthy, dirty, doody, homoerotic chaos and has boys squeeling with delight as they ram each other from behind over and over again like a big ole bunch of fancy boys who like that game better than they like praying with their own prayer counselors!!! I'm just sickened by it! If you have a boy who has one of these games, throw it on the book burning pile immediately and send that boy to the prayer shed for an emergency prayer cleansing!
    Slathered in the Fresh Hot Blood of the Infant Christ,
    -Youth Minister Harry Lester

  • #2
    Re: MARIO KART Turns Children into Gay Homosexuals!

    It gets worse Minister Harry. They're encouraging Mudstuffing openly on Youre-a-Tube.

    Two Gay Guys Playing
    Ecclesiastes 1:18 - For in much wisedome is much griefe: and hee that increaseth knowledge, increaseth sorrow.


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    • #3
      Re: MARIO KART Turns Children into Gay Homosexuals!

      Originally posted by Back against wall View Post
      It gets worse Minister Harry. They're encouraging Mudstuffing openly on Youre-a-Tube.

      Two Gay Guys Playing
      What a horrifying link! Thank you for the warning. I will write that link down on my list of filthy, dirty boy links I keep next to the research computer.
      Slathered in the Fresh Hot Blood of the Infant Christ,
      -Youth Minister Harry Lester

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      • #4
        Re: MARIO KART Turns Children into Gay Homosexuals!

        I thought Mario cart was that damn food cart selling ethnic food outside main gates of Freehold

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        • #5
          Re: MARIO KART Turns Children into Gay Homosexuals!

          Also in Mario Galaxy(Another evil game) has a secret message turning kids gay in the title screen


          Thank you for the warning Sir!
          Proverbs 15:26 - The thoughts of the wicked [are] an abomination to the LORD: but [the words] of the pure [are] pleasant words

          POKEMON=SATANIC PAGAN RITUAL
          Check out my new Discipline Lotion if you have NAUGHTY kids

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          • #6
            Re: MARIO KART Turns Children into Gay Homosexuals!

            Nintendo has made strides in inclusiveness with many of its properties, Mario Kart among them, but they still have a ways to go.

            Of the 36 playable drivers in Mario Kart 8, 12 are female-presenting. That's one in three, a big improvement from the SNES original's one in eight. However, there are still zero POC on the roster, and Birdo, the most visible trans* character in gaming, has been dropped from the series for no apparent reason. Also problematic is the introduction of the White Shy Guy, who bears a disturbing resemblance to a hooded Klansman. Given Japan's troubled history with representations of Black people, it is reasonable to wonder about their intentions here.



            I'm thinking maybe hackers could shift the balance a little by giving the Black Shy Guy some Black Power imagery, like a raised fist salute, Afro, and Cleaver pants. How cool would that be?
            Alex | 28 | He/Him | White | Non-disabled | BLM & ACAB | Proud godless communist | All opinions mine and correct

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            • #7
              Re: MARIO KART Turns Children into Gay Homosexuals!

              Originally posted by Alex Osterman View Post
              Nintendo has made strides in inclusiveness with many of its properties, Mario Kart among them, but they still have a ways to go.

              Of the 36 playable drivers in Mario Kart 8, 12 are female-presenting. That's one in three, a big improvement from the SNES original's one in eight. However, there are still zero POC on the roster, and Birdo, the most visible trans* character in gaming, has been dropped from the series for no apparent reason. Also problematic is the introduction of the White Shy Guy, who bears a disturbing resemblance to a hooded Klansman. Given Japan's troubled history with representations of Black people, it is reasonable to wonder about their intentions here.



              I'm thinking maybe hackers could shift the balance a little by giving the Black Shy Guy some Black Power imagery, like a raised fist salute, Afro, and Cleaver pants. How cool would that be?
              Are you a faggot? You sure do talk like a faggot. Try being more normal and you'll get a girlfriend so you won't have to be queer any more.
              Let Jesus Christ Wash You Clean
              in 2016

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              • #8
                Re: MARIO KART Turns Children into Gay Homosexuals!

                ***NONSENSE REMOVED BY MODERATOR***
                Last edited by Mary Etheldreda; 12-20-2016, 01:15 AM. Reason: Time for your meds, dear.

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