Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

[Nobar King]

Friends, I was browsing the internet looking for other Godly web logs when I came upon an inspiring site. I quickly thought of the horrible trolls who infest our forum, and the lazy way they throw around apostrophes. My mother (RIP) used to say about people with bad teeth: "So and so looks like God took a handful of teeth and just threw them in his mouth." This is what apostrophe errors look like to me. I remember studying apostrophe rules in English class. How many are there? 10? It's like 2 pages in the English textbook. Examples of this transgression are like the fourth nail that the triclavianists throw at us.

SATAN WORSHIPPERS TAKE NOTICE:

http://evilapostrophe.blogspot.com/

[beautifulbloodsucker]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

Cake...
A demon?!
How...
I am so lost.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

Cake...
A demon?!
How...
I am so lost.

We know friend, but do not give up. We will help you reach Salvation!

[beautifulbloodsucker]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

Im sorry.
I misread it.
Just glanced at the picture...
My bad.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

Im sorry.
I misread it.
Just glanced at the picture...
My bad.

That's it friend, repent of your wickedness!

[Nobar King]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

That's the worst haiku I've ever read.

[One-eyed Jack]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

Brother Nobar, that comment about haiku made me so joyful before the Lord that my beverage came forth like the camels of Hazeal from my nostrils. Surely the spirit of Jesus inspires your words.

~~ OEJ

[Nobar King]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

Who knew it was the French?

[Nobar King]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

[Nobar King]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

Friends, I was browsing the internet looking for other Godly web logs when I came upon an inspiring site. I quickly thought of the horrible trolls who infest our forum, and the lazy way they throw around apostrophes. My mother (RIP) used to say about people with bad teeth: "So and so looks like God took a handful of teeth and just threw them in his mouth." This is what apostrophe errors look like to me. I remember studying apostrophe rules in English class. How many are there? 10? It's like 2 pages in the English textbook. Examples of this transgression are like the fourth nail that the triclavianists throw at us.

SATAN WORSHIPPERS TAKE NOTICE:

http://evilapostrophe.blogspot.com/

Your mother was a wise and observant woman and had a poetic turn of phrase. The erroneous omission or addition of the apostrophe is an insult to The Almighty; when He dictated KJV1611, He made sure that all apostrophes were present and correct. A sign, were one needed, that we should do the same ourselves.

Allowing trolls to desecrate this site, which was raised for the Glory of The Lord, is an abomination.

I would encourage anyone seeing such blasphemy to quote the error and write in Bold Red after the offending word, “The Wrong Apostrophe There!” E.g

“It’s (TWAT!) idea is good but it contradicts itself.”

Oh, and whilst I’m about The Lord’s Work, has anyone a verse justifying stoning for using “There” instead of “Their” or “They’re” and vice versa?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

God has made it crystal clear that proper grammar, spelling and punctuation is important to him. Glory!!

"one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law" - Matthew 5:18


My Godly father encouraged me to use my apostrophes correctly when I was a boy. A broken finger or toe for each mistake got my attention right now, I can tell you.

[Nobar King]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

YOUR/YOU’RE



“You’re” is always a contraction of “you are.” If you’ve written “you’re,” try substituting “you are.” If it doesn’t work, the word you want is “your.” Your writing will improve if you’re careful about this.

If someone thanks you, write back “you’re welcome” for “you are welcome.”

Examples:
You're right about your poor grades.
Your car and you are using too much gas.
You're an alcoholic.
You're a sinner.
Your dinner is ready sir.
Use your brain, already. You're lucky God gave you one.

[Nobar King]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

Dear members,

I have noticed an increase in the number of apostrophe errors in this forum. Please take a moment to familiarize yourself with the following apostrophe rule:

Be aware of the its/it’s exception. You should only use an apostrophe with the word “it” when you want to indicate a contraction for “it is” or “it has”. Otherwise, its is one of the few words that indicates possession without an apostrophe. For example, “The dog is eating its bone”. This may seem confusing, but it follows the same pattern as other possessive pronouns: his, hers, its, yours, ours, theirs.

It will make it easier for everybody to understand your messages if they are written clearly. Thank you for your attention.

[Nobar King]

Re: Beware the dangers of the evil apostrophe

This sign shows how thoroughly ingrained apostrophe errors are in our society. Almost EVERYONE is failing to see the difference between it's and its.

It's an important rule to remember.

However, in this case, the apostrophe abuse draws the viewer's attention away from those lusty buttocks.