Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

[Bob4God]

Secular scientists, blinded and driven mad by satan, have somehow become convinced that we share something like 96 percent of our genetic makeup with chimpanzees!

Of course all this science stuff is just garbage, because Genesis 2:7 says that GOD formed us from the dust of the Earth, and then breathed life into us. That's science.

Still, scientists continue to argue that we are close relatives to chimps. That's right, they believe we are related to these creatures that are covered in hair, who are violent, and who play with their own excrement.

With that said, I would like to present a meticulously researched counter-argument:

Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

1. Humans create and use tools. Chimps do not.

2. Chimpanzees have hair all over their bodies, while humans only have hair on their heads, and a couple other places GOD intended.

3. Chimpanzees smell awful, while humans bear the GODly scent of springtime rains in Ireland, old spices, and flowery perfumes.

4. Chimps are aggressive and territorial. Humans, blessed by GOD, are above such primitive behavior.

5. While humans are intelligently designed by GOD to have a single spouse of the opposite sex, chimps are promiscuous and mate with multiple partners without shame.

6. Chimpanzees are avid cannibals and eat each other on a regular basis. The only instances of human cannibalism happen in the jungles, where savage black people learned the behavior from chimps!

7. GOD gave humans the ability to read, write and communicate, so that we could read the Bible, write about His Majesty, and tell the word they are going to hell. Chimps have no form of communication and cannot read or write.

Chimpanzees are going to hell!

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

Chimpanzees are going to hell!

Yes, they are there to sodomize the secular scientists who believe they are related to us.

[Lost Sheep McUinnean]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

And an infinite number of chimps with typewriters never wrote the true Bible.

They wrote liberal 'versions' and the 'Good New' version.

[Meek and Humble]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

Unless chimps accept Jesus as their personal Lord and Savior, they have no hope!

[Iamfred]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

Chimpanzees have hair all over their bodies, while humans only have hair on their heads, and a couple other places GOD intended.


Take this one for example... check your arms... hair, check your legs.. hair, check your chest... hair... there is hair everywhere, so eh, you got owned I guess

There's just not as much hair because we don't need it anymore, it evolved slowly leading into less and less hair.

[Wide-Open]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

Sure Fred, sure.

So this person is going to Heaven?



I think not.

Oh, and you forgot the other questions. Tools? (and don't give me that old straw/thermite hill crap).

Or the fact that they can learn American Sign Language. That only says something about the US, not about those savages.

[Iamfred]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

I was just pointing out one flaw in the explantion..

And what does that tongue have to do with anything? I don't see apes with hair on their tongues...

[BelieverInGod]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

I'm confused Brothers,

I thought that since chimpanzees are animals that they have no souls and therefore don't go anywhere after they die.

I'd really hate the idea of my dogs ending up in hell.

[Aformerbaptist]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

1. Humans create and use tools. Chimps do not. in fact chimp have learned to use rocks and spears to hunt and use.

2. Chimpanzees have hair all over their bodies, while humans only have hair on their heads, and a couple other places GOD intended. so do humans, you have hair everywhere on your body, just not as full.

3. Chimpanzees smell awful, while humans bear the GODly scent of springtime rains in Ireland, old spices, and flowery perfumes. in fact, animals use different scents to lure mates. just like humans.

4. Chimps are aggressive and territorial. Humans, blessed by GOD, are above such primitive behavior. psh so are we. for centuries and millenias in the past, humans have fought for their territory. and humans are aggressive also, have you ever watched sports or a fight?

5. While humans are intelligently designed by GOD to have a single spouse of the opposite sex, chimps are promiscuous and mate with multiple partners without shame. so do humans haha cheating happens all the time

6. Chimpanzees are avid cannibals and eat each other on a regular basis. The only instances of human cannibalism happen in the jungles, where savage black people learned the behavior from chimps! what about some of the serial killers in the US that raped their victims and ate them? its a psychological illness or pure craziness.

7. GOD gave humans the ability to read, write and communicate, so that we could read the Bible, write about His Majesty, and tell the word they are going to hell. Chimps have no form of communication and cannot read or write. you are right about how they cannot write and read; however they do communicate just like every other organism on this planet.

simple psychology

[Iamfred]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

Aformerbaptist, stop wasting your time mate , look at this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Landover_Baptist_Church

[True Disciple]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

in fact chimp have learned to use rocks and spears to hunt and use.

Wow, that's amazing! They use natural objects! But hey, so does an octopus. Are you saying an octopus is your granddaddy? You are a funny guy!

Come back when you can show me a chimp constructing a bicycle, and riding it.

so do humans, you have hair everywhere on your body, just not as full.

Which makes us very, very different, don't you agree?

In fact, animals use different scents to lure mates. just like humans.

Yes, different scents. Because, you know, they are different animals. Not the same, as evilutionists claim about monkeys and people.

psh so are we. for centuries and millenias in the past, humans have fought for their territory. and humans are aggressive also, have you ever watched sports or a fight?

We don't fight for our territory because it's our territory. We aren't greedy animals. We fight for it because God gave it to us, and we have the right to it.

so do humans haha cheating happens all the time

It was very rare among humans, until, of course, the hellish theory of evilution became taught at public schools, teaching people that they were animals, and that therefore they should behave liike animals as well.

what about some of the serial killers in the US that raped their victims and ate them? its a psychological illness or pure craziness.

Again, these people also were indoctrinated with evilutionist propaganda, which made them become rampaging psychopaths. Just another instance of people being taught by atheists to behave like monkeys.

you are right about how they cannot write and read; however they do communicate just like every other organism on this planet.

Yes, except humans. Which is Brother Bob's point here.

[Aformerbaptist]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

Wow, that's amazing! They use natural objects! But hey, so does an octopus. Are you saying an octopus is your granddaddy? You are a funny guy!

nope im saying that animals learn just as we do. maybe not to the extent, but they learn unlike you.

Come back when you can show me a chimp constructing a bicycle, and riding it.

come back to me when you learn the laws of thermodynamics and basic biology, chemistry, and physics


Yes, different scents. Because, you know, they are different animals. Not the same, as evilutionists claim about monkeys and people.

humans use different scents to lure mates. look at the many different perfumes and colognes that we use.

We don't fight for our territory because it's our territory. We aren't greedy animals. We fight for it because God gave it to us, and we have the right to it.

american revolution, french and indian war, texas revolution, wwI and wwII, etc.

It was very rare among humans, until, of course, the hellish theory of evilution became taught at public schools, teaching people that they were animals, and that therefore they should behave liike animals as well.

very rare!?? whatever, cheating happens all the damn time sir. and taught in public schools??? man you are twisted. not once in my public school was cheating pushed on us, if fact it was never brought up. you are so ignorant

Again, these people also were indoctrinated with evilutionist propaganda, which made them become rampaging psychopaths. Just another instance of people being taught by atheists to behave like monkeys.

no they werent, they have psychological problems sorta similar to yours.

Yes, except humans. Which is Brother Bob's point here.
he said animals cant communicate period, which that is the biggest load of crap i ever heard and that is saying something

right

[BelieverInGod]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

You know, I really enjoy watching animal shows. They're usually quite good if you ignore all the evilution stuff. I have never seen one where chimpanzees use spears.

As for rocks, well seagulls have figured out that they can smash open clams by dropping them on rocks, are you saying a seagull is as smart as you?

[IAmJustAMan]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

1. Humans create and use tools. Chimps do not.
FALSE: footage has been captured of chimps sharpening sticks and hunting small animals.
2. Chimpanzees have hair all over their bodies, while humans only have hair on their heads, and a couple other places GOD intended.
Look again. look real close. unless your a cancer paitient you have hair all over your legs, your face your chest your EVERYTHING
3. Chimpanzees smell awful, while humans bear the GODly scent of springtime rains in Ireland, old spices, and flowery perfumes.
lift up your arms and take a whiff
4. Chimps are aggressive and territorial. Humans, blessed by GOD, are above such primitive behavior.
The 3,010 WARS we've had in recorded human history suggests otherwise
5. While humans are intelligently designed by GOD to have a single spouse of the opposite sex, chimps are promiscuous and mate with multiple partners without shame. Never been to the trailer park before have you?

6. Chimpanzees are avid cannibals and eat each other on a regular basis. The only instances of human cannibalism happen in the jungles, where savage black people learned the behavior from chimps!
Ask Christian Alfred Packard otherwise.
7. GOD gave humans the ability to read, write and communicate, so that we could read the Bible, write about His Majesty, and tell the word they are going to hell. Chimps have no form of communication and cannot read or write.
FALSE: chimpanzees can communicate with sign language and a select few can read
Chimpanzees are going to hell!
why would god bother making them then?

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

Ways Humans Are Not Like Chimpanzees

1. Humans create and use tools. Chimps do not.
FALSE: footage has been captured of chimps sharpening sticks and hunting small animals.

Are you sure you weren't watching a National Geographic special on negroid pygmy tribes?

2. Chimpanzees have hair all over their bodies, while humans only have hair on their heads, and a couple other places GOD intended.
Look again. look real close. unless your a cancer paitient you have hair all over your legs, your face your chest your EVERYTHING

There's still not much hair, and far, far less than a chimpanzee.

3. Chimpanzees smell awful, while humans bear the GODly scent of springtime rains in Ireland, old spices, and flowery perfumes.
lift up your arms and take a whiff

Speak for yourself.

4. Chimps are aggressive and territorial. Humans, blessed by GOD, are above such primitive behavior.
The 3,010 WARS we've had in recorded human history suggests otherwise

Where did you draw up this arbitrary number? Can you list all these wars?

5. While humans are intelligently designed by GOD to have a single spouse of the opposite sex, chimps are promiscuous and mate with multiple partners without shame. Never been to the trailer park before have you?

While some people are promiscuous (notably negroes and homosexuals), the majority of people are monogamous. This is a trait that is not found anywhere else in the animal kingdom. Monogamy of humans proves we are not evolved from animals.

6. Chimpanzees are avid cannibals and eat each other on a regular basis. The only instances of human cannibalism happen in the jungles, where savage black people learned the behavior from chimps!
Ask Christian Alfred Packard otherwise.

A Christian would not eat human flesh. Jeffrey Dahmer, was a cannibal, and became a Christian, but he ate people before he repented of his sins and became a born-again Christian. That's an important difference.

7. GOD gave humans the ability to read, write and communicate, so that we could read the Bible, write about His Majesty, and tell the word they are going to hell. Chimps have no form of communication and cannot read or write.
FALSE: chimpanzees can communicate with sign language and a select few can read

Oh, I'd really like to see this. What's next, you're gonna say they can fix transmissions and compose symphonies?

Chimpanzees are going to hell!
why would god bother making them then?

Do you have Scripture to support that point of view?